The Shadow tournament
by Mr. Towel
Summary: I know its been done before, but here is my Yu-Gi-Oh tournament, entries are welcome(chap 38 now up)
1. The Rules

(L-space) I don't own any of the characters of yugioh, and I'm not sure what ages the cast are normally, so you'll have to bear with me. And I don't know what happened to the god cards, so I've given Ra to joey, obelisk to kaiba, and Yugi holds slifer the sky dragon.  
  
I'm sorry, that for about 10 minutes this was replaced by reviews I got for something else, there was an update problem.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------  
  
(Kaibacorp headquarters)  
  
Yugi Moto and Joey Wheeler walked through the doors to Seto Kaiba's office in the head branch of his business; Kaibacorp.  
  
Yugi focused on the chair behind the desk that had been turned to face the window;  
  
"Kaiba, I know you're there, why have you called us here?"  
  
He was taller than normal, and had a harshness of voice that was not usual in the short teenage boy.  
  
A voice came out from behind the chair;  
  
"Yugi, I knew you'd come."  
  
Joey Wheeler cut in with his American drawl;  
  
"Kaiba, can the special effects, just tell us face to face why we you called us here!!!"  
  
A long-suffering sigh came from behind the chair. Then it turned to face the 2 duellists, to reveal Seto Kaiba sitting in it, tall for his age, and sole owner of the Kaibacorp Company, his eyes were strained from lack of sleep.  
  
"I did not invite YOU here at all, Wheeler, I invited Yugi, but I should have expected his little puppy dog as well, but I suppose he might want to know this as well, I am sponsoring a world wide tournament, in which we 3 are to compete. Since Kaibacorp are only sponsoring it, I have no say in who gets invited, but wheeler gets a legitimate entry for once."  
  
"Huh."  
  
"So, Kaiba, why call us here, why not surprise us with the knowledge, when it gets announced."  
  
"Because, Yugi, I need a guinea pig to test out my new duel disks, you see, I was impressed with the shadow realm that Marik created with this rod,"  
  
At this he pulled the millennium rod out of a secret compartment of his desk, the same rod that his ancestor had wielded in combat with the pharaoh, thousands of years ago.  
  
"And I have managed to create something with similar debilitating effects, while not being lethal in any way."  
  
"Kaiba, what is this madness?"  
  
"Well, I realised that in this 'Shadow realm', you were almost defeated by Marik, and as my deck is vastly superior to his, with similar distractions, I am almost certain to win."  
  
"But Kaiba, you are potentially re-releasing the shadow games, many of lives will be at stake."  
  
"No they won't, for my disks will only simulate that effect, combining the effects of modern technology and herbs of a mental suppressing nature. Pegasus' company is producing many new cards for this tournament, including millennium cards, cards that embody the power of the millennium items. Now to test my system, wheeler, you can spectate, but from your position, the full power of these new systems won't be revealed to you, do you have your deck Yugi?"  
  
"Of course"  
  
Spoke the spirit of the pharaoh, whose reign had ended with Kaiba's descendant's betrayal.  
  
"Then let's duel."  
  
________________________________________________________________________  
  
(Kaiba's private duelling field, top of Kaibacorp headquarters.)  
  
Yugi and Kaiba walked to the centre of the field, and put on their duel disks, noting that they were heavier than usual, Yugi walked to his designated spot on the roof, then they each activated their duel disks.  
  
As the field arm extended itself from the disk, 8000 life points flashed up on the screen, and a dark purple mass began to surround them, Kaiba had done his planning well.  
  
"Yugi, put on the eye-piece and the gas mask!"  
  
Kaiba shouted across the darkening field. Yugi noticed a small gas mask with elastic straps, similar to the sort you'd get in hospitals, and a computer screen, the size of a lens from a pair of glasses, mounted on an ear piece with a microphone, which held itself in front of his mouth. He put both of these on, and waited for Kaiba to explain the new rules.  
  
"As you can see, Yugi, the holographic emitters produce a purple cloud, similar to that of the shadow realm, and that gasmask you are wearing will supply you with oxygen in a steady rate, the life points have been doubled again, and the eyepiece will give you various pieces of information, which change according to your skill level, and whether you have any cards that make it do anything different. My step-brother had some useful ideas with the deck master system, and so, those who wish to use it can choose it by setting their duel disks to DMS, on the little control panel next to your hand. And for novices, the rules will be explained on the eyepiece. Now to the cleverest part of the new system, the debilitating effects, whenever you take damage to your life points, you shall be forced to inhale marijuana smoke, with concentration, and amount varying with your tolerance and skill levels. Also, if you take a direct hit, the concentration will double, and you'll have to inhale twice as much. For this battle our disks will be set on 'medium' and performance in this and future duels will change the setting, rather than doing it manually, you can switch it off, if you and your opponent agree. Each deck carries enough marijuana for 10 duels, after which they will need to be refilled. Now; IT'S TIME TO DUEL!!!!!!."  
  
With these words, a small light ignited on the side of the disks, and the 2 champion duellists drew their cards.  
  
~~~~~~~Kaiba~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Yugi~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
~~~~~~~8000~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~8000~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
~~(No monsters on field)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ (No monsters on field)~~~~~~~  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(L-space)  
  
Oh, nasty cliffie there, the duel will begin next chapter, I have made up new cards for the tournament, but these will not be absurdly powerful, so don't worry, anyone wishing to have a cameo in the tournament, leave a review, and email me your deck list, along with the name you'd like to be called, sex, description, and also whether you want any new cards added, made up cards will be considered, and may be adapted to suit, and I will be happy to add any of my new cards to your virtual decks, should I see fit.  
  
Any one who is allergic to marijuana smoke, the magic of story-telling shall fix it so you aren't. See you next chapter, and remember, the only way to leave this greeney Smokey place, is to use the review button. Oh and no millennium items please.  
  
(Mr. Towel disappears in a cloud of funny smelling smoke, leaving just the reader, north is the review button, behind you is the story, pick one exit.) 


	2. A midget with the munchies

(L-Space) (In front of you is a towel and Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard  
  
Welcome back, and if you wish to enter, please also include attk, def points of your cards and their effect, unless it's a really common one, because I don't want to have to spend ages looking up every cards detail before they get played.  
  
I do not own yugioh, nor the concept of millennium item cards.  
  
(oh and thought speech is between s even when they're thinking to theselves)  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You areabout to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Shadow tournament'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking a cannabis joint and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Kaiba's personal duelling field)  
  
KaibaYami  
  
80008000  
  
(No monsters on field) (No monsters on field)  
  
Yami's turn;  
  
"So you think drugging me will help you win, do you Kaiba? Well, you are about to be sorely disappointed!! I DRAW!!!"  
  
The ex-pharaoh looked at his cards and saw 'Black Luster Soldier' and black Luster Ritual', along with his favourite combo, 'Kuriboh', and the magic card 'Multiply'.  
  
Yugi, we must not let this new trick of Kaiba's defeat us.  
  
Yeah, Yami, lets get Kuriboh out first, see if he has anything up his sleeve before we play our most powerful monster.  
  
Agreed  
  
Yami, please could I face Kaiba for once, you can advise me, but I'd like to try this without you behind the cards.  
  
Okay, but I'll start us off  
  
"Alright Kaiba!! You'll remember this one from duellists Kingdom!! I summon Kuriboh, in defence and play the magic card multiply, then I'll place one card face down, your move."  
  
"I'll draw!!"  
  
Seto Kaiba looked at his hand, 2 out of his 3 'blue-eyes-white-dragon's his 'polymerisation' card, 'Lord Of the dragons', 'Horn Of summoning dragon' and magic jammer.  
  
Excellent, I just need one more Blue-eyes to beat him, or if that doesn't work, 'Obelisk The Tormentor' is waiting in my deck for unwary foes, luckily for me, I had combos before I got that almighty card.  
  
"Alright, I lay one trap card on the field, and play Lord Of The Dragons along with the magic card Horn Of summoning dragon, allowing me to bring out 2 of my Blue Eyes!!, and with a triumphant flourish, he laid the cards onto the field. Now since you have the DK version of multiply, I cannot kill your Kuriboh's, so I end my turn.  
  
"I draw!"  
  
Yugi pulled a card from his deck,  
  
Hmm, monster reborn, this can get me out of a tight spot later   
  
No, you can use it now Yugi, think, which other card in your hand can you use it with to create a powerful monster?  
  
I have it  
  
"But for now, I activate 'Raigeki, destroying first your lord of the dragons, and then your 2 blue eyes!"  
  
"What? NO!!"  
  
"Yes Kaiba, your monsters are gone!"  
  
A Lightning bolt hit each monster, causing them to expire on the spot.  
  
"Not only that, but I shall use my monster Reborn to bring back your blue eyes!"  
  
"NO!!!"  
  
Yugi slid the card into his duel deck and pressed the button under it, an emerald shaft, headed with an otherworldly design hit the ground, and then from the point at which it struck, the ground started to shatter, outwards in a circle.  
  
"Now, Kaiba!!"  
  
Yugi shouted over the earth shattering sound of the dragon's bellows from beneath the earth.  
  
"How does it feel, to have your favourite monster facing you?"  
  
Kaiba began laughing, an evil maniacal laugh, that can only be described with a  
  
"MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA"  
  
"Don't count on it, my Blue eyes' are loyal to me, and to me only, that's why I activate the trap card, MAGIC JAMMER!!"  
  
The expanding circle of earthquakes slowed, and where covered with a red magic aura, in a green circle. And as Kaiba discarded, a giant germ flew towards the magical site and was sucked in, dissolving the emerald sign into black vapour, as the ground healed where it once stood.  
  
"Very clever Kaiba, but you shall still be the first one to test, your demented new scheme, Kuriboh, switch to attack mode!! Charge!!!! My swarm of kuribohs do damage, of however many empty spaces on my side of the field that there are, multiplied by its original attack, so say hello to 1500 points of direct damage!"  
  
The Kuriboh's bombarded the CEO of Kaibacorp, forcing to inhale two great lungfulls of marijuana smoke. He stood, having a coughing fit, helped by the respirator which was now pure air again.  
  
"#cough# ok, I er.. I draw..."  
  
Kaiba pulled the top card off his deck, and played the magic card immediately:  
  
"Pot of greed, gives me 2 new cards from my deck, hey you know I thiknk Pegasus smokes this stuff, okay.."  
  
Kaiba fumbled with his 2 new cards.  
  
"Okay, I summon, La gin, the mystical genie of the lamp, and he shall attack your kuriboh swarm, not damaging it, for they soon replenished, but as La gin has 1800attk, and your cute little fuzzy things only each have 300, you take 1500 damage, fule!!"  
  
The genie flew into the swarm of Kuribohs, and he blasted one of them out of the sky, as Yugi stared at the charred fuzzball, he inhaled 2 smaller lungfulls of smoke, causing his eyes to water behind the eyepiece he was wearing.  
  
"Ya know Kaiba; I've kind'a got the munchies."  
  
KaibaYami  
  
65006500  
  
La Jinn, The Mystical Genie Of The Lamp Kuriboh swarm  
  
Status: stonedMunchies  
  
"Well, for your skill during the battle, you will be assigned prize points, the amount of which is viewable through your eyepiece, you even get 'em if you lose, you just plug them into a vending machine, and you er.. Thingy, get as much munch as you want..."  
  
Kaiba trailed off.  
  
"Any way, my move, I draw."  
  
Said Yami, taking control, to let his stoned light side mong out.  
  
Yami, can I get some food?  
  
Sure, once we beat this guy.  
  
k  
  
Yami drew from the deck, pulling out his feral imp,  
  
hmm, I better not risk this with that la jinn on the field.  
  
good idea  
  
"I'll just switch my Kuriboh swarm into defence mode for now"  
  
"Can I have marshmallows on pizza?  
  
Later aibou  
  
"HAHAHHAHA, now you shall witness the power of my most powerful card combo."  
  
"First, I activate stop defence pulling your Kuriboh's into attack, and then I summon cyber-stein in defence then I activate mystical rain, giving us both 1000lp, then I use my monsters effect to pay 5000 life points to summon, my BLUE EYES ULTIMATE DRAGON"  
  
"What!?!?"  
  
um blue berry toast, uh , I mean NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooo  
  
you can stop now  
  
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! I'm done  
  
good, because Kaiba's going to have to take a lot of marijuana to do it, so he may not be able to think past this move  
  
great  
  
Kaiba is meanwhile inhaling a large amount of smoke in one go, forcing him to cough and his eyes to stream. He found himself floating, the eyepiece letting him see through the eyes of his monster, as it bore down on the Kuriboh swarm.  
  
"Wait, Kaiba, I'm glad I forgot to activate my quick-play magic card earlier, but here it is Magical hats hidden in the hats are my Swarm of Kuriboh's a mirror force and my Dk edition, spellbinding circle, your stoned brain has very little chance of taking my swarm.  
  
"I pick the middle left hat!"  
  
"Oh shit!"  
  
The 3-headed dragon knocked the hat aside with its claws, and then charred 3 kuribohs, as Yami lost 4200 life points, 5 more took their place, and Yami took the full hit of ganja smoke.  
  
KaibaYami  
  
20003300  
  
La Jinn, The Mystical Genie Of The Lamp, Kuriboh swarm  
  
(Cyber Stein) blue eyes ultimate  
  
Status: wastedstoned like a monkey that's just fallen on a very big rock  
  
Hey, Yuge, I think you better take over, I feel like that guy of life of brian, you know, gets stoned to death?  
  
very funny Yami, I think, I better take over, MIND SHUFFLE  
  
urgh, Yami, that took a lot out of me  
  
Yes, I think these drugs weaken our connection, you had better win quickly  
  
"Okay, I draw, and play pot of greed"  
  
A pot appeared and broke, leaving Yugi with 2 extra cards.  
  
"Now I activate the magic card dark hole destroying all our monst-diddly- onsterers, then sacrificing from my hand, my dark magician and feral imp using a black Luster ritual, I summon black luster soldier."  
  
Yugi's final monster grew up round him as the monsters were sucked into the glowing shield and swords on his arms, he pulld out a long, thin blade and charged towards Kaiba, cutting the rest of his life points away and winning the game, only, Yugi got so caught up in the virtual moment of beating Kaiba, he tripped over his shoe, to bang his face on the ground.  
  
KaibaYami  
  
00003300  
  
bugger all, Black Luster Soldier  
  
Status: completely monged outMunchy attack  
  
Yugi and Joey left the roof without so much as another word, leaving the wasted CEO to be taken to his room by his minions.  
  
That night the king of games slept as soundly as he had ever done in his life.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(L-Space)  
  
Yay, that's the first duel down, now if anybody knows the name of that card and is in the tournament, you shall get through to the next round if you tell me, secondly, if you spot what English TV show I ripped the intro off, you shall also qualify for round 2, so hurry up, and work em out  
  
(Mr. Towel disappears in a cloud of funny smelling smoke, leaving just the reader, north is the review button, behind you is the story, pick one exit.) 


	3. Some introductions, and a loss

(L-Space) (In front of you is a towel and Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard  
  
Welcome back, and if you wish to enter, please also include attk, def points of your cards and their effect, unless it's a really common one, because I don't want to have to spend ages looking up every cards detail before they get played.  
  
I do not own yugioh, nor the concept of millennium item cards.  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You areabout to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Shadow tournament'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking a cannabis joint and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------- (Kaiba's mansion)  
  
"Wiggle your Big toe."  
  
Kaiba sat, staring at his feet, his minions had carried him to bed but he wasn't tired, though he couldn't move his legs.  
  
"Wiggle you big toe."  
  
He kept trying over and over to just move his toe, trying to get off the bed to get some munchies, but he couldn't move, the dosage in the disks had been to high.  
  
"Wiggle you big toe."  
  
He was officially monged out  
  
"Wiggle your..."  
  
His big toe moved back and forth, it was a start  
  
________________________________________________________________________  
  
(England, 9 pm)  
  
"Got your plane tickets?"  
  
"Mum, I'm fine, get off!"  
  
The older woman pulled away from her son, he stood there, in front of his friends, with his baggage slung over his back. They were about to board a plan for the Duel Monsters World cup. There was Rob Machin, the guy's best friend, and companion duellist, next to Rob, was Olly 'Targit' Howse, their crazy friend from high school, who didn't play the game but wanted to offer support, and then the guy at the front, Edd, county duel monsters champion, his invite had specified, one other duellist, and upto 2 friends for moral support. So here they were, off to the biggest tournament on the planet, since duel monsters had become the biggest fad to hit the earth since mashed potatoes.  
  
"Will you be alright with the foreign languages?"  
  
"Mum, why do I have to keep telling you, the earpieces are translators."  
  
"Oh ok, have fun, and don't do anything illegal."  
  
"Of course not, now we gotta catch our flight."  
  
________________________________________________________________________ (Domino high, 13 hours later.)  
  
"Sorry I'm late sir, I over slept."  
  
"Very well take your seat."  
  
Seto Kaiba strode to his seat as the teacher went out of the class to get some work.  
  
He stalked up to the back row, and sat behind Yugi, he gave him a sharp kick in the seat.  
  
"So, Moto, how did you like my little demonstration last night?"  
  
"It was enjoyable Kaiba."  
  
Said Yugi, stiffly;  
  
"But I'm going to have to decline my entry to the tournament, there is nothing for me to gain by doing it."  
  
"Moto, my employers insisted that you enter the tournament, and they have very persuasive methods."  
  
"Kaiba! I thought you weren't evil anymore!?"  
  
"Yugi, I'm not threatening you, but you must understand, my employers have been through a lot to get this tournament running, and they won't want to see it running without its star duellist. Everybody says an American will win, as Bandit Keith was only the champion by cheating, you don't want us to lose to those idiots do you?"  
  
"Kaiba, you can beat any American."  
  
"Yes but if they come in second and third, America will still win overall. Yugi, that episode with Noa, well, I, want us to be friends for a change, that might be more profitable than my jealous rage making me duel you all the time."  
  
At this point, Joey seized Kaiba from behind;  
  
"Alrigh' you, who are you and what 'av you done with the real Kaiba."  
  
Kaiba swung his brief case over his head onto Joey's back;  
  
"Argh, guess you are Kaiba then."  
  
"So, Yugi, will I see you there?"  
  
"I guess,"  
  
"Good;"  
  
Kaiba stood up  
  
"I guess you better find the teacher before he gets drunk again."  
  
________________________________________________________________________ (The Lunch hall)  
  
Yugi and Joey rounded the corner of the corridor,  
  
~~~~~~~ Miswim Yamitoshi ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Ran Domperson~~~~~~~~  
  
~~~~~~~10000~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~1500~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Ha, finally, I summon Lord of the dragons in defensive mode, and use my horn of summoning dragon to bring out my ultra-rare, ~Barrel Dragon~ Now with his Kick-ass effect, I..."  
  
The lord played a few notes, which discorded, then 2 dragon dwelling in the caves appeared;  
  
"No, I didn't want them!"  
  
"Ha, you fool; they must have been the only dragons in your hand, don't you know your own monsters, Barrel dragon is a machine.  
  
"What, no!! ok, I activate offerings to the doomed to sacrifice the cave dragons and 500life points to summon barrel dragon, now, his kick ass effect, 3 coins, are tossed, then if I get 2 heads out of 3, your Dark Necrofear is going bye-bye."  
  
Miswim, swept back her long black hair, revealing a black rose with golden thorns tattooed into her shoulder; In a barely disguised whisper of disgust, she said,;  
  
"Huh, amateur."  
  
"All right!"  
  
The boys luck had changed, Dark Necrofear was destroyed, but its ghost lingered, possessing the Barerel dragon, and dragging it to Miswim's side.  
  
"You fool, didn't you realise that Dark Necrofear's ghost takes control of your most powerful monster that's out, of course you didn't because you're rubbish at this game, now 'I'll' use your monsters effect."  
  
Her golden eyes glinted as she threw 3 coins onto the hologrammatic field,  
  
"Oh, I guess your Lord of dragons is going bye bye too. Now Barrel Dragon, ATTACK!!"  
  
The dragon turned to point at the boy, and fired its 3 cannons.  
  
~~~~~~~ Miswim Yamitoshi ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Ran Domperson~~~~~~~~  
  
~~~~~~~10000~~~~~~~~~~~Victor: Miswim~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~0000~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Now hand over your card boy, I need to go sell it at the gaming shop. And get some real cards."  
  
The Goth marched over to the boy, who held it out;  
  
"Fine, take it."  
  
He then ran off to hide in the toilets.  
  
"Dat were real mean of ya, ya know"  
  
Shouted Joey, running across to the girl;  
  
"Come-on, I'll duel you for that kids card, right here, right now!"  
  
"Well, I'd love to, mongrel, but I better get to class, I need a nap. I here your in the tournament though, I'll hang on to this card till then, bt you'll have to put up a big stake for it."  
  
She walked away, her, high-heeled boots tapping on the floor, when she reached the corner, they speeded up.  
  
"I'm gunna beat her so fast, she won't know what hit her."  
  
"come on, we'll miss maths."  
  
"And Dat's a problem??"  
  
"Hey jus' kiddin', stop lookin at me like that."  
  
In the corner of the room, behind the light streaming in from the window was a patch of shadows, were a figure lurked, he smiled a sinister grin, and with a quiet chuckle to himself , followed Yugi, and Joey. Cluthing an entry ticket to the tournament.  
  
________________________________________________________________________ (The Game-Shop, 6 pm)  
  
"So, Yug, who's this Miswim girl?"  
  
"A Goth, she rarely comes to class, she managed to afford a duel disk some how, the one she was using, sure wasn't one of the school ones."  
  
"Yes, and I fear that you may not beat her as easily as you thought, Joseph."  
  
"What the?"  
  
A man wearing a turban stept out of the shadows.  
  
"Shadi, you scared me. Joey, this is Shadi, a friend of Ishizu's, he is the one who holds the millennium scales, and the millennium ankh."  
  
"I correct you my pharaoh, the scales are waiting for their owner still, I hold them for that one."  
  
"Uh, thanks Shadi,," Said Joey, sitting down, a little shaken.  
  
"Who's the girl Shadi?"  
  
Asked Yugi indicating a teenage girl hiding behind the robed man..  
  
"This is, *ahem* Wind Striker, she is a helper of mine and will be entering the tournament to keep an eye on things."  
  
"Yes, uncle Shadi, hi Yugi, Shadi here's told me a lot about you."  
  
"We best be going soon," interrupted the tomb-keeper, "But first let me warn you, this 'Miswim' is going to be part of this, so keep an eye on her and don't underestimate her, she was fated to be in the semi-finales at battle city, but after being defeated by Mai, Ishizu, *ahem* appropriated her locator cards."  
  
"Ah,"  
  
""So, er, we best be going."  
  
The elderly item-holder vanished, along with his protégée.  
  
"So, they're gone now?" asked Joey.  
  
Yugi nodded.  
  
"That Wind, sounded like a fan-girl."  
  
"A what?"  
  
"Ah, well it's a good thing you came to me, you see...."  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------- (L-Space)  
  
Ta-Da, now thank Boo and Bob for helping me to churn out these chapters at record speeds, see ya dudes, I'm going home.  
  
(Mr. Towel disappears in a cloud of funny smelling smoke, leaving just the reader, north is the review button, behind you is the story, pick one exit.) 


	4. Preparations

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard  
  
Welcome back, and if you wish to enter, please also include attk, def points of your cards and their effect, unless it's a really common one, because I don't want to have to spend ages looking up every cards detail before they get played.  
  
I do not own yugioh, nor the concept of millennium item cards.  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You areabout to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Shadow tournament'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------- (Yugi's room, later that night)  
  
Yugi said goodnight to Joey and shut the door, the spirit came out of the puzzle.  
  
"Yugi, why did you agree to the tournament with Kaiba this afternoon? Didn't you feel our connection weaken from that duel?"  
  
"Yes Yami, I did, but Kaiba was acting... strange... and with Shadi showing up it looks like I did the right thing after all."  
  
"But Yugi, our connection could be permanently severed if we lose even the one duel."  
  
"Yami, in battle city we risked our lives many a time over the stake of one duel, this morning, the effects had all worn off. Yami, losing one duel wont separate us. Besides, we've never lost before."  
  
"What about when we first duelled Pegasus?"  
  
"We'd of won, but Pegasus fixed the clocks, 2 more seconds, and he wouldn't of captured grandpa."  
  
"Kaiba then."  
  
"You know very well that we'd have won that one too if he was playing by the rules."  
  
"Reb..."  
  
"Hello? We resigned, we'd just drawn the card that would have defeated her."  
  
"I spose..."  
  
"Yami, we've never lost a duel, without some outside factor; cheating, threat of suicide, or friendship. Even if it could severe our connection, we never lose."  
  
(Tokyo airport)  
  
"Come on, boy, don't dawdle."  
  
"I bin stuck in the joint for 2 months, I just wanna look around."  
  
"You were only let out a month early so you can go to this duel monsters thing."  
  
"I guess the government wants us to win the cup too."  
  
"Yeah, I thought it was an individual game though, how's the winning country decided?"  
  
"Well, each round each of us gets to gets the USA another point, then, in the finals, points are awarded depending on final position, 1st gets 10 points, 2nd gets 9 and so on.  
  
"Ah, here's your bag Dereck."  
  
(The other side of baggage claim)  
  
"That was one long flight; did you see that guy in front of us?"  
  
"Yeah, he had a bodyguard."  
  
"Movie stars son?"  
  
"Nah, didn't you read the booklet, he's Derek Conklin, the American champ, they got him out of prison to duel, cos... well he's their champ."  
  
"Edd, here's our stuff."  
  
"Ah, way to go Olly."  
  
The 3 picked up their bags and headed towards the door.  
  
"So where's this tournament being held then?"  
  
"On some boats in international waters. We'll be vulnerable to terrorist attacks, so they have an escort of 5 battle ships, not that its likely."  
  
The group saw a chauffeur with 'Payne' on his card.  
  
"That'd be us, let me try out this new translator thingy."  
  
"Go ahead Edd.  
  
He hooked the small eye/earpiece over his ear and turned to face the man.  
  
"Hi, I'm Edward Payne; you're here to pick us up for the tournament?"  
  
"Hai, Payne-san. This way please."  
  
"Yeah, I understood him!"  
  
"Uh, Edd, he was speaking in English, you had it switched off."  
  
"Oh."  
  
The 3 friends followed the chauffeur to a stretch limousine.  
  
"Cool!"  
  
"Notradyne Systems sent a Limousine for most contestants, Payne-san, they're the ones hosting the tournament."  
  
"Ah."  
  
(A hotel somewhere in Tokyo.)  
  
"Anyway, this tournament's gunna be on some boat, or somet. So how's the land of Auss?"  
  
Sora put down her cards she was absent mindedly shuffling through.  
  
"And Dad?"  
  
She'd just arrived from the airport, and no sooner had she got through the hotel door, then her mum had phoned her.  
  
"Ok, seeya, bye!"  
  
She put the phone down.  
  
"Crap, 9 o'clock."  
  
She'd meant to visit her pen friend before it got too late, but her mum had kept her chatting for ages.  
  
"I better check my deck then turn in; hopefully Tea will be at the docks in the morning."  
  
(Kaiba Mansion)  
  
"What is it Mokuba? I'm busy."  
  
"Seto, I thought you should know before tomorrow, I've entered the tournament."  
  
"That's nice Mokuba, now go to bed, I have to prepare for the tournament tomorrow."  
  
Mokuba stuck his head round his brother's door, Seto was fast asleep, he looked around and saw a door-answering machine, a bit like a normal answer machine, except it turned itself on when the door was opened.  
  
"Night, night brother, I'll see you at the tournament."  
  
(Tea's house)  
  
"So Tea, you said someone was bringing you to the tournament, it'd be great to have you with us."  
  
"Yeah Joey, my Australian pen-friend's taking part, she said I could be her extra person, that leaves you free to take Serenity, and Yugi, to take Tristan."  
  
"Who's Mai bringing along?"  
  
"I'm not sure, she didn't say."  
  
"Oh well, I guess we'll find out tomorrow, ey? I better go, see ya."  
  
"See ya Joey."  
  
(Valentine Mansion)  
  
Mai picked up her deck.  
  
"Ok, one more time, but then I'm going to bed!"  
  
She spread out her cards on the table in front of her.  
  
"Now Yugi and Joey will be my main competition, and they've seen my whole deck, so if I add these...."  
  
Mai pulled two cards out of pouches and laid them next to her harpy's pet dragon.  
  
"Now I'll need... Yes..."  
  
(Another random hotel room in Tokyo)  
  
"Hey Edd, guess what's on the box?"  
  
"What Rob?"  
  
Shouted Edd from the next room.  
  
"Kill Bill."  
  
"Cool, we'll watch this then go to bed. You up for that Ollie?"  
  
"Hell yeah!"  
  
Shouted Ollie, running in from the 3rd bedroom.  
  
"This place sure is nice. I wonder what our cabins on the boat'll be like."  
  
"Yeah, well I'll guess we'll find out tomorrow."  
  
(The Shibousha Shourei inn)  
  
A strange man pushed his way through the throng, to the bar, pulling out a box with some duel monsters cards in;  
  
"I'll have a beer."  
  
"Hai"  
  
The stranger shuffled his deck, and put it back into his pocket next to an invitation. (Shadi's Tokyo apartment)  
  
"Wind, you should be taking this time to prepare your deck for the tournament, not watch 'Kill Bill' for the hundredth time."  
  
"I'll do it in the morning."  
  
"Well we leave here at 8, so unless you want to get up at 6, I suggest you do it now."  
  
"Ok, ok, I'm doin' it, I'm doin it."  
  
Wind pulled out her deck, and trunk cards, then chased her mother's friend out of the room. Before sitting down to watch TV again, with her cards spread over the coffee table. (The Shibousha Shourei inn)(Upstairs)  
  
Miswim listened to her parents yelling as she gathered her deck together, after 5 years, it was just background noise now, she slipped her deck into a hidden compartment in her shoe, which she slipped under the bed, her father wasn't going to ruin this tournament.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(L-Space)  
  
The tournament starts next chapter, but I'm still accepting entries, and will be until the finals, though, after chapter 10, no new duelists will be able to make it through to the finals, unless they tell me what card Kaiba used, in chapter 2, and what TV intro, I'm ripping off, oh and btw for all you lawyers out there, I don't own or plan to make money off that or kill bill either.  
  
Well see ya guys, I'm goin' home  
  
(Mr. Towel disappears in a cloud of funny smelling smoke, leaving just the reader, north is the review button, behind you is the story, pick one exit.) 


	5. The tournament begins

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard  
  
Welcome back, and if you wish to enter, please also include attk, def points of your cards and their effect, unless it's a really common one, because I don't want to have to spend ages looking up every cards detail before they get played.  
  
I do not own yugioh, nor the concept of millennium item cards.  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You areabout to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Shadow tournament'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking a cannabis joint and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(The docks 9am)  
  
"Come on big brother, we don't want to miss the boat."  
  
"I don't know why I let you talk me into bringing you along."  
  
"But Seto, I........."  
  
"Present your boarding passes. Ah Kaiba, Seto, and Kaiba, Mokuba, no guests?"  
  
With a furtive glance at Seto, Mokuba quickly shook his head.  
  
"Ok, then you to can share cabin 17 on boat no. 3, have a nice trip."  
  
"Next!!"  
  
"Ah, Payne, Edward, and Machin, Robert, guests?"  
  
"Just the one,"  
  
"Hi, I'm Howse, Oliver."  
  
"Okay, three single berths, that's cabins 20-22 on boat no. 2."  
  
(The Shibousha Shourei inn)  
  
"Dad, Mum, I'm off to a friends for a week or 2, I've got my mobile."  
  
"Shut up I'm tryin ta watch the telly."  
  
(The docks)  
  
"Next!"  
  
The official took the boarding passes of the next group  
  
"Moto, Yugi, and Wheeler, Joey, one guest each?"  
  
"Yes, that's right."  
  
"She your girlfriend Wheeler-san?"  
  
"No, she's my sister."  
  
"Ah, then that'll be 2 singles and a double berth?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Rooms 19-21, boat 3. Have a nice trip"  
  
Another guard wandered over;  
  
"Baka."  
  
"He might have wanted a single berth for the 2 of them."  
  
"Huh.  
  
"Next."  
  
The figure, shadowed by his great overcoat handed the boarding pass to the official.  
  
"Thanks, any guests?"  
  
"No."  
  
Came the voice from behind the hood.  
  
"But I would like room 31 on boat 1."  
  
"I don't think that's being used... yep, single berth, room 31, boat 1, here are your keys."  
  
"Next!?"  
  
"Conklin, Derek."  
  
The guard handed the boarding pass to the surprised official.  
  
"We'll have a double berth, I'm keeping my eye on him."  
  
"Yes sir, room 13, boat 3. Have a nice trip."  
  
"Next!"  
  
Miswim darted out of the shadows.  
  
"Here."  
  
"Ah, Yamitoshi, Miswim, yes, you can have room 30, boat 1."  
  
"Thanks."  
  
"Good luck."  
  
"Thanks."  
  
She hurried onto the boat.  
  
"Next!"  
  
"YES, I THINK YOU'LL SEE MY NAME ON THE LIST, JUST THERE."  
  
A skeletally thin hand slipped out from under a robe and dropped 1000 American dollars on the clipboard.  
  
The official gulped, he wasn't supposed to do this, but he needed a new car, and there was that spare room.  
  
"Uh, room 29 then, single berth if that's okay?"  
  
"THAT IS ABSOLUTELY FINE, AND NEXT TIME I SEE YOU, YOU SHALL BE ON MY LIST."  
  
"Uh, sure, um..."  
  
But the figure had disappeared.  
  
"Uh, Next!"  
  
"Here."  
  
"Ah, um, 'Wind Striker'?"  
  
"Yep, oh yes, the Canadian champion, boat 3 room 27."  
  
"Next?"  
  
"G'day mate."  
  
"Pardon?"  
  
"Ah, bugger, hang on, I'll get this translator thing working."  
  
"No, no, its working fine, I just didn't here you."  
  
"Oh, I said G'day mate."  
  
"Right, um, you'd be the Australian champion then, Sora Jade?"  
  
"How did ya tell? Must be me nose."  
  
The Australian showed the official her boarding pass.  
  
"Any guests?"  
  
"Well, there is the one, but I aint seen 'er anywhere, have you? A Sheila, calls herself 'Tea'."  
  
"It's Teá actually."  
  
"Ah, wicked cool, that'd be 2 singles then please, mate. Sorry bout that girl."  
  
"Okay, boat 2 then, have a nice trip."  
  
"Its fine SJ, after all we are friends...."  
  
As the two girls went onto the boat, the official slipped the money into his pocket.  
  
"SORRY TO BOTHER YOU."  
  
The Official nearly jumped out of his skin.  
  
"BUT COULD I ORDER A CURRY?"  
  
"Um, you'll have to sort that out with room service, sorry."  
  
"SORRY TO WASTE YOUR TIME."  
  
"I could always..."  
  
But the stranger was gone.  
  
(On board boat 3)  
  
"It's this way Yug."  
  
"Joey, I'm going to have a look this way, okay?"  
  
"Fine, suit yourself, keep your mobile on."  
  
"Will do."  
  
Yugi went through one of the doors into the ship; everybody had translators on now, so communication was no problem, he saw Kaiba coming the opposite way, and without thinking he ducked through a cabin door into the kitchens, he didn't want to face the arrogant CEO yet.  
  
He walked between the tables, looking for a way to his room A knife glittered in the sunlight streaming through a porthole, Yugi kept walking, suddenly paranoid, not looking behind him, just heading as fast as he could to his cabin, he heard a sound behind him, he turned, there was a man in the shadows.  
  
"You shouldn't be here."  
  
Said the man, reaching for the knife, he picked it up, and played with it for a second before saying.  
  
"Yugi Moto, right? well you won't be here for long."  
  
"W-What do you mean?"  
  
Asked the suddenly frightened teen.  
  
The man swung the knife, and Yugi heard it whistling through the air.  
  
(Edd's cabin)  
  
"Couldn't be better."  
  
Said Edd as he walked through the door connecting his and Ollie's rooms.  
  
"All 3 rooms, with lockable doors between 'em we don't have to go out into the corridor to visit each other."  
  
"Yeah, hey Edd, hadn't we better get on deck, isn't their some sort of announcement?"  
  
"Yeah, Ollie, you can stay here if you want."  
  
"Nah, I'll come with you guys."  
  
"K, oh wait, its not till we leave, I'm gunna go check out some of the stalls on deck, see you guys at the announcement."  
  
"Seeya Edd!"  
  
The two called after him as he left the room.  
  
(The kitchen)  
  
THUNK  
  
The butcher's knife chopped through the bone like it was made out of butter, 2kg of bone, meat and sinew fell onto the floor.  
  
"Now look what I did."  
  
The cook bent down to pick up the leg of lamb he'd dropped on the floor;  
  
"I'll have to wash it again. What I meant was Yugi, is that you'll go up to the next round soon, that's on an island ahead of us. By names Bob by the way Bob Slade."  
  
"Nice to meet you Slade-san."  
  
"Call me Bob. We'll be leaving soon, so you better get to your cabin, it is this boat right?"  
  
"Yeah, yeah."  
  
"What number."  
  
Yugi looked at his keys,  
  
"Uh, room 21."  
  
"Ah, that's just down the hall to your right. See ya later little buddy all right, but don't come through the middle of the kitchen again, ok? Just knock on the door, or hang by the side, you could get seriously injured here."  
  
"Ok, uh, bye."  
  
As soon as Yugi was out of the door he legged it to his room, colliding with a short, green-haired boy on the way. He didn't even notice, as he ran on.  
  
"Stupid Yugi, I'll get you this time. Hiohohohohoho"  
  
I'm sorry if you disagree with your characters nationality. Or any mannerisms they may have picked up. My plan is not to offend any body.  
  
(Mr. Towel disappears in a cloud of funny smelling smoke, leaving just the reader, north is the review button, behind you is the story, pick one exit.) 


	6. More rules

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard  
  
Welcome back, and if you wish to enter, please also include attk, def points of your cards and their effect, unless it's a really common one, because I don't want to have to spend ages looking up every cards detail before they get played.  
  
I do not own yugioh, nor the concept of millennium item cards.  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You are about to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------- (Boat 1)  
  
Everybody here? Good."  
  
Everybody in the tournament was on the deck of boat one, as the crews finished preparations to leave, the rope bridges to the other boats were still up.  
  
"Now you must all be wondering about the rules for the new tournament. Well, everybody is given a duel disk, now some look like the classic ones from battle city, and based on your ranking; you could be getting a different disc. No disc has any less functions, well during duels at any rate."  
  
The boats began to pull away from the docks.  
  
"All duel discs will be able to duel with any other, in a variety of ways, including double duelling, tag team duelling, and the new deck master system, none of which is compulsory to use."  
  
A rope in a hangman's noose slipped around the leg of an official standing on the dock, looking up at the ship.  
  
"Your eyepieces will explain the any system you are unfamiliar with, just say; 'keyword: help:' then the name of the system you don't understand."  
  
The rope began to tighten, still unnoticed by the grinning official.  
  
"Now, to the new 'Shadow' rules. At the beginning of any duel, the holographic emitters will produce a purple fog, which shall surround the players, preventing them from any distraction, though anybody outside will be able to see the duel, with life points and monster stats hanging in the air."  
  
With a loud 'Oof 'sound, the official was pulled from the docks, hitting his head on the side, rendering him unconscious as he was pulled into the water.  
  
"Remember it is important to know that though you may think you can see things in the fog, it is all an illusion and nothing can harm you."  
  
The official was dragged underwater by the rope, where it came from, wasn't immediately apparent, as the icy water woke him up.  
  
"Then you must put on the respiratory masks, which, when your life points are damaged, will release marijuana smoke, simulating strain to the body, and the mind."  
  
As the official was pulled through the icy depths, he thought he saw a seven foot tall skeleton with glowing blue eyes.  
  
"I suggest only one duel in as 3 hour period, or you will suffer a severe handy cap, when entering the next duel."  
  
The skeleton reached into a pocket in its robe, and pulled out an enormous egg timer, and a pair of room keys, he looked at them both and sighed.  
  
"There will be several tournaments going on at once here, the main tournament, the accumulation of points for country teams, the 'comedy' tournament, where people enter with decks that have a funny theme, and finally the team tournament, which will involve double, and tag team duels, which will still be acknowledged as part of the main tournament, as we have drawn up proper rules for them. These reformatted rules will be viewable in your headsets."  
  
The Skeleton drew back his scythe, and swung.  
  
"I think that's everything, good luck, now head over to the stalls on the decks of your boat to pick up your duel disks. The rope bridges will be disconnected in 10 minutes to allow the boats to travel through the gates of the docks and will be reconnected 1 hour later, when we are in international waters, when the duelling will commence, as we head to the place where round 2 will take place. Oh and one more thing, everybody starts with 2000 points, to advance to the next level you need 10000, each duel, you choose how many points to bet, and the winner gets them, and his pick of one card form the losers deck. Happy duelling."  
  
He chopped through the rope pulling the man down, and flipped the life- timer over. The official surfaced and took gasps of breath. As he swam for shore, he could have sworn he heard a voice, as deep as the crypts shouting;  
  
"I OWED YOU A FAVOR."  
  
(Boat 3)  
  
"Uh, can I have my duel disk please?"  
  
"Name?"  
  
"Yugi Moto."  
  
The woman handed Yugi a duel disk, coloured in an elegant shade of purple, with a dark-magician holding a regal pose over the slot for Yugi's deck.  
  
"Joey wheeler. Mine'll be the one made outta gold."  
  
The woman laughed, and reached behind the counter, she pulled out: a duel disk shaped like a yellow dog's head with the big ears forming the two sections of the his card field, and a lolling red tongue poking out of the bottom of the deck holder. Joey turned it over and saw written on the bottom, good luck puppy, Kaiba.  
  
"That no-good stinkin'..."  
  
"Seto Kaiba."  
  
The Kaibacorp CEO was handed a blue-eyes white dragon, its wings forming his field, the deck coming out of a dragon's mouth, and the covered in perfect detail, down to the colour of its eyes.  
  
Kaiba slipped his deck into the mouth, and pushed it shut.  
  
"Puppy dog, if you manage to make it to the next round, you do have a decent duel-disk waiting for you. But we all know you'd never get that far."  
  
"Grr, I outta... "  
  
"Save it for Later Joey, I've entered us in the team tournament as well."  
  
The two friends walked away followed by the taller Kaiba.  
  
"Um, Mokuba Kaiba please."  
  
The woman handed over a regular duel-disk to the terrified teen.  
  
"Good luck honey, if you make it to the next round, I'll have a good-un waiting for ya."  
  
"Thanks ma'm."  
  
"S'alright kiddo."  
  
The smaller Kaiba slipped his duel disk into his back pack, and ran off to his room.  
  
Maybe I can finish reading that book before the tournament starts.   
  
He thought to himself.  
  
"Derek Conklin."  
  
The woman looked at the large guard.  
  
"Not me, him."  
  
Said the guard pointing at the dark-haired boy standing next to him.  
  
The disk-woman rummaged through the boxes behind the stall.  
  
"Hmm, I'm sure I saw, somewhere."  
  
The woman straightened up, and handed Derek a metal snake, with a wrist strap, there was a small space on the back for his deck., which he slotted in, and slid a cover over the top.  
  
"Striker, Wind."  
  
"I don't need your name back to front sweet heart."  
  
Said the old woman glancing at the blond in the black leather outfit.  
  
"Here you go."  
  
The old woman handed Wind-striker a normal duel disk, which was in the shape of the ying/yang symbol, but with red and silver moons colliding, and crossing over.  
  
"Weevil Timothy Underwood."  
  
"Hmm, nice name, okay even though you never got past the beginning stages of any decent tournament, you are to get th9is personalised disk."  
  
She handed over a green, insect queen, its front legs forming the playing field.  
  
"Excellent, Hiohohohohohoho."  
  
(Boat 2)  
  
"Sora Jade."  
  
The man behind the counter passed over a phantom of the opera mask, with a cloak billowing out to form her duelling field.  
  
"Ah thanks mate."  
  
"Next!"  
  
"Edd Payne"  
  
"Ah, we have something special here for you."  
  
He reached behind the desk and pulled out a grey duel disk, it had a hole in the middle, and a deck holder mounted on a pop-out arm. Edd inserted his deck and shut the arm.  
  
"Where's the field?"  
  
"Ah, you'll see when you duel. Next!"  
  
"Rob Machin"  
  
"Sorry Machin-san, only a regular disk for you."  
  
"It's okay."  
  
Said Rob as he took his disk.  
  
"But if you get to the next round you'll get something special."  
  
"Good to know."  
  
(Boat 1)  
  
"Hello my name is Ryou Bakura, can I have my disk?"  
  
"Of course young man. Oh, this is a creepy one."  
  
The old woman behind the counter handed over a disk shaped like an angel split into two halves; its wings were folded into its back.  
  
"When you activate the disk, the wings fold out to form the duelling platform, I suppose it means something to you."  
  
"Yes, yes it does."  
  
Like the reason I'm in this tournament.  
  
A dark figure reached for the counter.  
  
ahem "I am here for MY duelling disk. My name is BILL door."  
  
"Ok, Door-san, here's..... wow!"  
  
The duel disk was an ebony construction, made entirely out of what seemed to be bone. It had a grinning deaths-head for the cards.  
  
"AH yes, this will do perfectly."  
  
The figure reached under his cloak and pulled out a duelling deck, which he inserted into the mouth of the skull, which closed over it.  
  
"I'll see YOU later."  
  
Then without another word, the man was gone.  
  
"Um, okay, uh, next?"  
  
The Goth strode up to the counter.  
  
"Miswim Yamitoshi"  
  
The woman produced a dolls head, mounted on a red gauntlet, with leathery bat wings, in place of the normal field.  
  
"So I get all the creepy disks."  
  
Miswim slipped the deck on her arm, inserted her deck into a hole in the dolls head and walked away.  
  
"Next?"  
  
"Rex Raptor. I was told it would be in the form of a mammoth graveyard?"  
  
"All we got for you is the regular one. Sorry."  
  
Rex snatched it and marched off muttering under his breath.  
  
The tannoy sputtered to life.  
  
"WE ARE NOW OUT OF THE HARBOUR, BRIDGES UP, AND DUELING WILL COMMENCE NOW."  
  
(Boat 2)  
  
So, Rob, wanna duel?"  
  
Asked Edd holding out his disk.  
  
"Yeah, right, oh, and Josh told me to give this to you."  
  
He held out a barrel dragon, Josh Cable, a friend of the two had once traded for their most powerful cards out of their decks when they were starting out.  
  
"Wow, does that mean he gave you..."  
  
"Yep, and I've put it right in my deck." "You know, I never saw that card."  
  
"Well you won't until you see me duel."  
  
"Oh that reminds me; I entered us in the team tournament."  
  
"Great, we'll kick so much ass."  
  
"Hi, is one of you Edward Payne?"  
  
The two turned around, an American stood behind him.  
  
Edd answered;  
  
"Yeah, what can I do for ya?"  
  
"My name's Derek Conklin, we duelled over the internet some time ago."  
  
"Oh yeah, I remember, what's up Derek?"  
  
"Yeah, I challenge you to a duel."  
  
"Wow...ok, you sure? First duel, lotta people watchin'."  
  
"Course I'm sure, let's duel!"  
  
The two threw a chip to each other which lets the disks identify the opponent, then they each took 5 steps back, clearing room for the holograms.  
  
"1000 points and one card?"  
  
"Sure."  
  
"lets do this  
  
Derek pressed the activation button, and the snake's tail shot out displaying a duelling field, the head twisted around, and black fog started billowing out of the holographic emitters in the eyes.  
  
Edd pressed his button, and the grey cover flew open, revealing relinquished, an arm sprung out revealing his deck, and the other swung round to form a duelling field, and the head turned, and started spewing the thick purple holographic fog.  
  
"Deck masters?"  
  
Asked Edd with his finger over the mode switch.  
  
"You know the rules?"  
  
Asked the dragon master.  
  
"Hell yeah."  
  
"Let's do it."  
  
They flicked the switches, and out of one of relinquished's armour pieces came a card holder, Edd slipped in a card, and the wings slammed shut.  
  
The mouth of the snake opened up, and Derek slipped in a card from his deck.  
  
Each disk released its gas mask, which the two boys strapped over their mouths and noses.  
  
"Many people may think that there are only 4 blue-eyes in the world, but the truth is, that there are 4 in each country, and I posses 3 of the American ones, so say hello to my deck master, the blue eyes white dragon!"  
  
Cried Derek, as the dragon flew out of the mists behind him.  
  
"Well, rather than a card which is rare, I have one which is ultra-rare in this world, so far I have not seen a single other person with this card, I show unto you, the might of my MOISTURE CREATURE!!!!!"  
  
Out of the mist came a closed umbrella, a gun/syringe with a virus in it, and a face made out of two pinpricks of yellow in a white bubble.  
  
"Huh, that's your deck master, it looks as insubstantial as this mist."  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(L-space)  
  
Well we begin the duelling, if anybody disagrees with what happens during a duel in this tournament, by al means contact me, and I will hold that duel, between me and that person over the internet, and it shall be documented in this fic.  
  
I'm sorry if you disagree with your characters nationality. Or any mannerisms they may have picked up. My plan is not to offend any body.  
  
(Mr. Towel disappears in a cloud of funny smelling smoke, leaving just the reader, north is the review button, behind you is the story, pick one exit.) 


	7. The first duel

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard  
  
Welcome back, and if you wish to enter, please also include attk, def points of your cards and their effect, unless it's a really common one, because I don't want to have to spend ages looking up every cards detail before they get played.  
  
I do not own yugioh, nor the concept of millennium item cards.  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You are about to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------- (Boat 1) EddDerek  
  
80008000  
  
(No monsters on field) (No monsters on field) Deckmaster: Moisture Creature Deckmaster: Blue Eyes white dragon  
  
"So ya wanna start?"  
  
Asked Derek in his best American drawl.  
  
"Ok, Derek old chap"  
  
Responded Edd with a posh British accent.  
  
"Old bean, I draw, then I place one card face down, and one monster face down. Your move me old sardine."  
  
"Ha, u is goin' down dawg.. I draw."  
  
hmm  
  
Derek looked at his cards,  
  
pretty damn good, he'll have trouble beating this  
  
"Ok, you Limey bastard, first, I'll place a card face down, and activate pot of greed, letting me draw 2 new cards, then I place another card on the field and summon Dark Blade, with 1800 attk power."  
  
"Not so fast me old mate, I activate Trap hole sending ur monster into the infinite abyss of ur graveyard, me old cocker-spaniel."  
  
Ha, he's gunna walk straight into my trap, sucker  
  
"'K"  
  
Said Derek putting on a grumpy face.  
  
"Your move."  
  
"Y Soitantly, I draw, and then, because I don't trust your face down cards one bit. I activate my deck-master ability."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Oh, no more accents, ok then, moisture creature's deck master ability acts sort of like a harpy's feather duster, you've heard of that card haven't you?"  
  
"It destroys all my magic and traps on the field?"  
  
"Got it in 1. So let's say good bye to your line of defence." Edd pressed a switch on his duel disk, and the viral gun turned to face Derek, and then sprayed purple goo over his hologrammatic cards, revealing a mirror force, and a rush recklessly card, before dissolving them completely.  
  
"And now that your defence is gone, I summon, Hysteric fairy in attack mode."  
  
The bespectacled angel rose from its card.  
  
"Now attack my feathered friend."  
  
The fairy flew towards Derek and whacked him across the face with its book, causing him to inhale the smoke from the respirator.  
  
EddDerek  
  
80006200  
  
Hysteric Fairy (1800attk) (No monsters on field)  
  
Deckmaster: Moisture Creature Deckmaster: Blue Eyes white dragon  
  
"Your move, boyo."  
  
Derek drew, and his deck masters effect flew up on his eyepiece,  
  
Well isn't that useful.  
  
"I summon spear dragon to the field, he can damage your life points, even if you have a monster in defence. "  
  
The small dragon with 2000 attack points came out of the snake's mouth and hovered, flapping its wings occasionally.  
  
"Then I activate MY deck masters effect, and transfer 1000 attk points to spear dragon. Spear dragon, attack his face down card!"  
  
The dragon charged towards the card, flipping it over, then impaling it onto Edd.  
  
Edd laughed as his life points dropped and he inhaled the penalty.  
  
"You fool, you just flipped penguin soldier, though I take 2400 damage, I can send 2 monsters back to their respective owners hands, so spear dragon loses his extra thou as he goes bye -bye back to your hand, and before penguin soldier dies, he brings himself back to my hand. Leaving you with no monsters, once again."  
  
EddDerek  
  
56006200  
  
Hysteric Fairy (1800attk) (No monsters on field)  
  
Deckmaster: Moisture Creature Deckmaster: Blue Eyes white dragon  
  
"Your move."  
  
"Thaks. I draw, and place 2 cards face down, and summon another monster face down. Then, Hysteric fairy, take another chunk out of his life points."  
  
Again, the nerdish fairy attacked the American, again, he inhaled cannabis.  
  
EddDerek  
  
56004400  
  
Hysteric Fairy (1800attk) 1 face down monster (No monsters on field)  
  
Deckmaster: Moisture Creature Deckmaster: Blue Eyes white dragon  
  
"You've almost lost half your life points buddy, you must be feeling it. Your move by the way."  
  
The American fought all effort to start dancing, and concentrated on the duel.  
  
He drew.  
  
"Okay, I'll put cave dragon in defence mode. Your move."  
  
"I draw, and summon a defence monster, your move."  
  
"No attack? Good, then I draw."  
  
What the hell?  
  
He had it, the combo that would help him win.  
  
I must be cautious  
  
"I summon spear dragon, and with all blue eye's attack points transferred to him, attack my pretty, attack his newest monster!"  
  
The souped up monster attacked the face down card with a whopping 3900attack points. Flipping mask of darkness, but forcing Edd to suck in almosthalf a duel's worth of cannabis smoke in one turn.  
  
"Oh my god, that rush."  
  
EddDerek  
  
21004400  
  
Hysteric Fairy (1800attk) spear dragon(3900attk,2500def)  
  
1 face down monster cave dragon(2000def)  
  
Deckmaster: Moisture Creature Deckmaster: Blue Eyes white dragon  
  
"Startin' to feel it ey? Eddy boy? After giving all 2500 of blue eyes's defence points to my spear dragon, I end my turn."  
  
The spear dragon switched to defence mode, with 2500 defence.  
  
"I draw, now I activate the permanent trap card needle wall, which I can use to destroy your spear dragon if I'm lucky, it's in position two on the field, your cave dragon, position is in 1, the rest are empty, now I roll a dice, and if I hit your monsters thingy, then it dies. If I get 6, then I roll again."  
  
Edd rolled a die, it rolled in between the legs of his hysteric fairy, then grew as the holograms built it up, it balanced on its edge, then fell over.  
  
It was a 2  
  
Two walls came out from nowhere and crushed the spear dragon.  
  
"No, my monster!"  
  
"Unfortunately, I can only use that after I draw, each turn. So I place one monster face down and 2 cards face down as well, end turn.  
  
"My turn, ahaha, luck is on my side, graceful charity! I activate it, drawing 3 cars, then discarding 2."  
  
He slotted a seyaru, and a meteor dragon into his grave.  
  
"AHAH, I activate the magic card null-effect which stops your monsters from using their effects to destroy my monsters, or send them back to my hand,, then I activate remove trap on needle wall, seeing as though if you had any traps that can stop me you would have used them on spear dragon."  
  
Edd did a loud fake gulp  
  
"Now, I summon my Blue eyes to the field, and activate my magic card Polymerisation fusing it with 2 others in my hand, to create the Blue eyes Ultimate Dragon"  
  
His deck master flew over his head, then 2 others came out of the field, flying upwards with it, they flew so close, they were almost indistinguishable from each other, then a beam of light shot up from his deck, fusing the 3 together, creating the beast of legends.  
  
"Now I can't attack, seeing as I fused them this turn, so, your move."  
  
EddDerek  
  
31004400  
  
2 face down monsters Blue eyes ultimate(3900attk,2500def)  
  
cave dragon(2000def)  
  
Deckmaster: Moisture Creature Deckmaster: Blue Eyes ultimate (on field)  
  
Ollie came up to Rob on the side lines;  
  
"What's happening Rob?"  
  
"Well Derek just summoned a monster with the highest attack points you can get without using any magic cards, or effects."  
  
"Wow."  
  
"Yeah, though Edd can defeat him, he just needs the cards, he has them in his deck, though, most of his deck is useless, Derek's stopped him using his effect monsters against him."  
  
"So Edd's scewed."  
  
"Unless he can get Raigeki out."  
  
"What's that?"  
  
"It's a magic card that destroys all of your opponent's monsters."  
  
"Cool."  
  
"Things aren't looking good for him though."  
  
"Ok, Derek, I draw, summon one monster face down and flip hysteric fairy into defence mode and use its effect to sacrifice itself, and my penguin soldier to up my life points by 1000. Your move."  
  
"You think defence monsters can stop my ultimate dragon? I activate my magic card Dragon's rage which gives me spear dragon's main effect, then I attack your newest monster."  
  
"Ah, I was afraid of that?"  
  
"Exactly"  
  
"I wouldn't survive that."  
  
"Exactly."  
  
"That's why I activate my trap card Dark spirit of the noisy instead."  
  
"Exactly....what?"  
  
"To make you attack, my other monster, Royal Keeper, I still lose 2500 life points, but thanks to hysteric fairy, I still have 600 lp left, which is just enough for my plan."  
  
The spirit intercepted the ultimate dragon, and directed it at the other card, which flipped exposing a royal keeper with 2000 defence points. Edd was forced to take a large breath of the debilitating smoke. But was still in the game.  
  
"Okay, um, I draw, then flip my des lacooda, and draw again, then I use its effect to flip it back over, then I use 500lp to use my deck masters effect again, you see, after the initial usage I have to pay 500lp to get it to work, so, that's me down to 100.  
  
EddDerek  
  
1004400  
  
1 face down monster Blue eyes ultimate (3900attk, 2500def)  
  
cave dragon (2000def)  
  
Deckmaster: Moisture Creature Deckmaster: Blue Eyes ultimate (on field)  
  
"Oh, look at this magic card, the book of moon it'll put a monster into face down defence, I'll use it on Mr. Ultimate dragon then."  
  
"What's that supposed to do?"  
  
"I think he's stoned."  
  
"But wait.... Dersh shmore, I then activate the trap I've had for ages, super- acidic-trap hole, which destroys any face down monsters on my opponents side of the field."  
  
"What?"  
  
"That means you lose mother fucker."  
  
Said Edd with a mean look on his face.  
  
The dragon reached behind it, and pulled its card over its head to hide from the moon that had flown out of a book, as he did, a fissure appeared beneath the card, and it dropped down into it, falling down into a pool of strong acid. Destroying Derek's deck-master.  
  
"Wow, dat were fun hey Derek?"  
  
The American just sat there, inhaling lung-full after lung-full of cannabis smoke, as fumes of his departed deck-master came up to him, suddenly, the fog faded away, and the duel discs closed up.  
  
------------------------------------------------- (Edd's eyepiece)  
  
New point total 3000 points  
  
Pick one card from Derek's deck.  
  
------------------------------------------------- (boat 1)  
  
Edd reached down to the cross legged boy, and the snakes head extended out to him, giving him the deck, Edd leafed through it and pulled out Derek's mirror force.  
  
"See ya some other time 'D'"  
  
(L-space)  
  
Well we begin the duelling, if anybody disagrees with what happens during a duel in this tournament, by al means contact me, and I will hold that duel, between me and that person over the internet, and it shall be documented in this fic, though I personally liked this duel, as we got to see some of the new enhanced cards.  
  
I'm sorry if you disagree with your characters nationality. Or any mannerisms they may have picked up. My plan is not to offend any body.  
  
(Mr. Towel disappears in a cloud of funny smelling smoke, leaving just the reader, north is the review button, behind you is the story, pick one exit.) 


	8. Prepare for the dark duel

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard  
  
Welcome back, and if you wish to enter, please also include attk, def points of your cards and their effect, unless it's a really common one, because I don't want to have to spend ages looking up every cards detail before they get played.  
  
I do not own yugioh, nor the concept of millennium item cards.  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You are about to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------- (Boat 1)  
  
As the crowd began to disperse, a small boy with spiky black hair ran up to Edd as Rob helped him away.  
  
"I saw you duelling there, you were realy something."  
  
"You too kid, you too."  
  
"You've seen me duel? Ah, you must of watched me online at battle city."  
  
"You know I was just being polite, I have no idea who you are."  
  
"My name is Yugi Edd-san"  
  
"Just Edd, so you were in battle city eh?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"So how well did you do?"  
  
"I won."  
  
"Really? I always thought you'd be taller. Nice to meet you."  
  
Edd stuck out his hand, Yugi looked at it a moment, then shook it vigorously.  
  
"If you want to come watch, 2 people are duelling on the deck of boat 2."  
  
"Sure, it'll be a laugh. You comin' Rob? Ollie?"  
  
"Nah, I'm gunna find a duel for myself, I'll see you at the first round of the team tournament later."  
  
"Ok."  
  
"Your in the team tournament too?"  
  
"Yeah what about it, uh, yugi?"  
  
"I'm in it too."  
  
"Cool, see you then."  
  
The two walked to the rope brdge.  
  
"You first Mr. Yug."  
  
Yugi hesitantly walked across the bridge. Edd followed slowly, pausing every couple of seconds to grap the hand rails.  
  
"Oh, this isn't safe when you're stoned."  
  
Edd staggered to the other side of the bridge.  
  
"Let's go!"  
  
The two walked to the crowd around the two girls, neither was backing down.  
  
(boat 2)  
  
MiswimMai  
  
59006000  
  
(No monsters on field) Harpie's brother  
  
"So Blondie, you ready to lose?"  
  
"Fat chance, like anybodies going lose to a pathetic Goth like you."  
  
"That's it Barbie, I'm going to pull out all the stops now, first I activate my magic card: Poker face, which lets me tribute these 2 monsters from my hand."  
  
Miswim handed a headless knight and a summoned skull to the doll like duel disk, which shoved them in its mouth.  
  
"Then I play soul exchange to sacrifice your harpie's brother, along with the two from my hand, to summon..."  
  
"What? An Egyptian god card?"  
  
"Noir Anubis! My most powerful card."  
  
The winged warrior turned into a bolt of white light, and two beams of blackness sprung from Miswim's hand, colliding, forming a black hole in nothingness, through which an enormous Jackal pounced.  
  
ATTk: 3000  
  
Def:3200  
  
"Poker face, allows the monster summoned to attack as soon as its summoned, even if rules in play prevent this, adding onto this the 'Yami' card I played earlier, and his attack power is 3400. Poker face then returns to my hand. NOW! NOIR ANUBIS, ATTACK WITH FEARLESS NIGHT!!"  
  
The gigantic beast bounded forward and bit into Mai with its enormous teeth.  
  
MiswimMai  
  
59001600  
  
(No monsters on field) Harpie's brother  
  
She shrieked in shock as she saw the hologram bite into her side, and she felt painful memories come rushing back with the inhalation of the cannabis.  
  
She looked around, everywhere, purple mist, she could make out faint faces, but she couldn't recognise them, it was battle city all over again. She ran into the darkness, the mist following her, not disappearing until the duel ended.  
  
"Where's that bimbo disappeared to? This cloud won't go till we finish this duel, and my patience is wearing thin. I end my turn, and If she doesn't come back in 5 minutes, she forfeits!"  
  
Away from the harshness of the purple mist. One boy ran after the frightened woman.  
  
"Mai, Mai, where ya goin'?"  
  
"Mai stopped and looked around, all she could see was purple fog, closing in on her.  
  
"Joey? Is that you?"  
  
"Sh, shh,"  
  
Said Joey as he hugged her.  
  
"Yes, it's me, Joey."  
  
"I can't see you Joey!"  
  
Shouted Mai as the mist closed in on her and she felt pressure round her torso.  
  
"It's these duel disks, they won't let you see anything, not in the duel till it's over.  
  
"I'll resign."  
  
"No Mai, you can win, I'll guide you back to your opponent, Miswim aint gonna take any of your cards."  
  
"Ok Joey, I believe in you."  
  
(Back near Miswim.)  
  
"Is that slut coming back? Or is she to scared to finish this?"  
  
"I'm here girl."  
  
Said Mai as she calmly stepped out of the fog,  
  
"Just making sure being alone didn't scare ya'"  
  
"Huh, as if, well, its your move harpy woman."  
  
Mai drew.  
  
All right, mirror wall, time to show this girl what it takes to be queen bee.  
  
"All right, listen up, I'm summoning Durames Dark witch, and placing one card face down."  
  
"Ok, ok, my turn now?"  
  
"Yeah, go ahead."  
  
"Okay, well I draw, and activate a certain special magic card."  
  
The black haired teenager flipped it in between her two first fingers.  
  
Reciting from memory she showed the card too her opponent.  
  
"This card can only be played if Noir Anubis is on the field, well I guess I just got lucky, effect 1: sacrifice a quarter of your life points to send all monsters on your opponents field to their graveyard and all monsters on your field (excluding The Seal of Anubis) back to your hand. Oh, I don't really think I want to use that one, oh, wait, it has another effect: effect 2: remove all trap and magic cards from play. Oh, that looks fun, I think Ill use that one."  
  
Miswim slotted the card into her duel disk and activated it. An octogram drew itself around Mai's face down card, then suddenly, when it was completed, Noir Anubis flicked his claw, and the card disappeared.  
  
"Now my dark beauty, attack her life points and finish that hag off!"  
  
The Jackal leapt at Mai, and she fell back as it pounced on top of her, its fetid breath in her nostrils as she unwittingly inhaled cannabis, then it bent its head down and ripped her organs out, before bounding into the mists that even the spectators could see around the two, then the holograms vanished, and Mai got up.  
  
"I lost."  
  
"That's right, now give me my Harpy's ghost back."  
  
"Hold on a second Miswim."  
  
"Oh the dog can speak."  
  
"I challenged you to the other day, and you said wait till the tournament, well it's the tournament now, so I challenge you to a duel, right here, right now."  
  
"You still want the lickle kids bawwell dwagon back do oo?"  
  
"Yeah, and Mai's harpy ghost too."  
  
"Oh, and I suppose you want my newly acquired thousand points as well."  
  
"That would be good. Yeah."  
  
"So what are your risking?"  
  
"My Jinzo."  
  
"That's a good card, but not worth my 2."  
  
"I hadn't finished; Jinzo, and my Egyptian god card, the winged dragon of Ra."  
  
"Wow, I here that's pretty powerful, Ok, you got yourself a deal."  
  
"Tommorow though Joey."  
  
"What Yug?"  
  
"I said tomorrow, Miswim's just had a duel, and is still high from the cannabis."  
  
"Oh yeah, when I win, you'd just say I cheated, and demand the win, nah, I'm not falling for that, tomorrow!"  
  
"Ok, if the little puppy's scared, I'll see you then, twelve a clock, on the top of the cock pit on this boat, if you're late, you lose."  
  
And with this the haughty Goth took her prize and strode away.  
  
"Oh, that was a cool duel."  
  
Mai sat on the floor, spaced out, her duel disk obscured by the harpy's wings folded over it.  
  
(The corridor outside room 30)  
  
"So, you are to duel the dog."  
  
A white haired man was leaning against the wall by Miswim's cabin, his face hidden by shadow.  
  
"What's it to you?"  
  
"I admire your style, in fact I'd like to duel you."  
  
"Oh, so you want my dark Anubis?"  
  
"No, I'm not after any of your cards, but I'd like you to work with me, and you don't properly know someone until you have duelled them."  
  
"So a friendly duel?"  
  
"You could put it like that"  
  
"What's your name?"  
  
The man lifted his head and looked directly at Miswim with his dark brown eyes  
  
"You can call me Bakura."  
  
"Well Bakura, where would you like to duel?"  
  
"How about my cabin?"  
  
"Sure. Shall I strip now or wait till later?"  
  
Bakura laughed at this.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Aren't you planning to impress me with your duelling skills and then sleep with me?"  
  
"No, NO!!!"  
  
"Sorry about that, I have a low opinion of your sex."  
  
"Well most of your sex try and sleep their way to the top."  
  
"True, but I definitely aint a Barbie-girl."  
  
"I like you already. I said my cabin, because we won't be disturbed, but we can duel wherever."  
  
"Let's go to your cabin."  
  
"Your choice."  
  
"Where is it?"  
  
"Right here."  
  
Bakura got out his key and opened the door to cabin 31.  
  
"Ladies first."  
  
"Sure..."  
  
The Goth strode into the room and gasped in surprise when she saw a table already set out for a duel.  
  
"You didn't think I'd be unprepared did you?"  
  
"No, of course not."  
  
Miswim sat down at the table, in the chair nearest to the door, ready for a quick get away.  
  
"Good, no bloody holograms."  
  
"I get tired of all this technology too."  
  
Said Bakura gliding over to his side of the table.  
  
"I like magic. You ever seen a magic trick?"  
  
"Sure, tons."  
  
Said the girl, unimpressed.  
  
"Well this one will blow you away."  
  
Bakura's chest began to glow and then a necklace appeared.  
  
"I prefer duelling in the shadow realm."  
  
The ring flashed, and then purple fog was all around them.  
  
"Oh brother, you have a hologram set up somewhere right?"  
  
"No, no, we are in the shadow realm, normally when a person loses a duel they get consumed by the shadows."  
  
"Dark."  
  
"Yes, your friend Mai has played here before, that's why your duel freaked her out."  
  
"Oh."  
  
Miswim was starting to become a little edgy.  
  
"Yes, but the hound found a way to let her out. Don't worry by the way. You will only fall prey to the shadows if your mind doesn't match up to the task, I shall beat you, but there won't be any penalty for losing."  
  
"Oh really? What do you mean about my mind?"  
  
"Well to duel here in the shadow realm, one must concentrate on their monsters to make them appear. If your mind is not up to the task, you shall fade away. Do not be afraid though, your show with that Dark Anubis showed me you were more than up to the job."  
  
"Are we going to duel, or are we going to talk for ever?"  
  
"Duel of course. Shall we use 4000 life points?"  
  
"All right."  
  
The two drew their starting cards.  
  
Miswim was an expert at reading poker faces, and realised that bakura was enjoying his hand a little too much.  
  
She set 2 cards on the field, then activated:  
  
"Card destruction!"  
  
They each deposited their hands in the graveyard and drew again, Miswim couldn't believe it, her second most powerful card, the one her duel disk had been based on.  
  
"Then I remove the 3 fiends that I just discarded from my graveyard to summon the mighty Dark Necrofear."  
  
As she put the card on the field, she felt her concentration start to slip, she focused and the monster climbed out of the card, it was 3 inches tall, but impressive nonetheless.  
  
"Well done."  
  
Said Bakura,  
  
"I was right. My move?"  
  
Miswim nodded.  
  
"All right. I draw, then I remove 3 fiends from my graveyard to summon MY dark Necrofear!"  
  
Again, a blue figure climbed out of a card, this one with more refined detail, than the one controlled by the Goth.  
  
"Mine is more powerful than yours, it was the first version to be created my Maximillion Pegasus. Its effect is more potent."  
  
"We'll see."  
  
"Yes, you will."  
  
"My turn."  
  
If I summon a monster, then attack his Necrofear with mine, he'll take control of my other monster, then my Necrofear will take it back, allowing me to get his life points.  
  
She looked at her hand.  
  
"OK, I summon Giant Rat in attack mode, then attack your dark Necrofear with mine, and because their attack power is the same, they both get destroyed. And their effects negate each other."  
  
"I just told you, no they don't. When MY dark Necrofear is destroyed, I activate the field magic card ."  
  
Disembodied teeth, mouths and eyes appeared everywhere.  
  
"Now we have n unlimited Magic card fields, and your monsters no longer obey your command."  
  
Not liking the sound of this, Miswim didn't attack.  
  
"Your move."  
  
"I activate the magic card final destiny board. Which will..."  
  
"I am fully aware of its effect."  
  
A glass on a mystical board spelt the letter 'D'  
  
"Good, finally somebody who can duel. Now I put this monster face down, and end my turn."  
  
Miswim drew a card from her deck.  
  
"Since I don't like the look of that field card, and because of your board, I activate the magic card, Giant Trunade."  
  
All of the magic cards on the field were blown back to their respective owners hands.  
  
"Now I activate MY final destiny board."  
  
A board appeared on Miswim's field, spelling an 'F'  
  
"I switch giant rat into defence, your move."  
  
"Hmm, good move, okay, I draw, and then activate return of the spirit; this allows me to bring back my 3 fiend monsters form out of play to the graveyard. Then I use monster reborn on my dark Necrofear, and remove those monsters again. Then I attack your giant rat. Your move"  
  
"Nice move, but now I get to summon a monster with less than 1400 attack points, so I choose Ghost Harpy this card gains 300 extra attack points per fiend/spirit or harpy on the field, so it goes up to 1700, now, I draw, and the letter 'I' makes its appearance and use offerings to the doomed to summon 3 monsters by paying 1000 life points, So, I summon another spirit harpy, and sacrifice my kuriboh which Also comes thanks to that card to summon summoned skull!"  
  
"Now, each of my ghost harpies have 2600 attack points, and one shall attack your dark necrofear."  
  
"Soon I will win Bakura."  
  
"not likely"  
  
With my dark Necrofear's hidden ability, I shall defeat this girl, ad prove that I am more skilled than her, then I shall use her to help me win this tournament and gain all of the millennium items!!!!!!  
  
I'm sorry if you disagree with your characters nationality. Or any mannerisms they may have picked up. My plan is not to offend any body.  
  
(Mr. Towel disappears in a cloud of funny smelling smoke, leaving just the reader, north is the review button, behind you is the story, pick one exit.) 


	9. The Dark Duel

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard  
  
Welcome back, and if you wish to enter, please also include attk, def points of your cards and their effect, unless it's a really common one, because I don't want to have to spend ages looking up every cards detail before they get played.  
  
I do not own yugioh, nor the concept of millennium item cards. Or this intro, anyone who guesses where the intro is from immediately gets to the second round  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You are about to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------- (The shadow realm)(Room 31)  
  
"Now you get to take control of one of my monsters."  
  
"No I don't."  
  
"Fine, then ghost harpy, attack his life points directly!"  
  
The harpy's ghost flew towards Bakura, and lifted its sword, and swung, but the force of the impact flew back at Miswim, and Bakura was left with more life points than before.  
  
"What happened?"  
  
"It's very simple, you see, this field holds a ghost, a ghost who possesses your monsters, when they attack me, half their attack points gets taken from your life points and added to mine."  
  
MiswimBakura  
  
67009300  
  
"OH, yeah, I've heard of this effect, but you can only use it on one monster a turn, so summoned skull! Other Harpy ghost! ATTACK!!!!!!"  
  
Bakura shuddered as he lost 5100 life points taking him to a measly 4200  
  
"My move?"  
  
"Of course"  
  
I activate the magic card dark door, and place one card face down, then using your ultimate offering card, I pay 500 life points to sacrifice my sangan, allowing me to draw a monster from my deck, and summon BEKURAK the white haired devil."  
  
The monster dived on its sacrifice, and tore it into shred, it stood up, and looked almost human, like Bakura was on the field as well. It had 6500 attack and defence points.  
  
"Now, as my life points are lower than yours I activate Megamorph on Bekurak, doubling his attacking strength, attack demon of the night, take out her summoned skull!!"  
  
The monster walked up to the skeletal figure, who began his lightning attack by raising his arms, then, quick as a flash, bekurak plunged his arm deep into the skeletal warrior's chest, and ripped him to pieces.  
  
MiswimBakura  
  
40004200  
  
The demon's attack points dropped until they reached 1300.  
  
"Your move Miswim."  
  
Bakura's ghost creature dived into a ghost harpy, unnoticed by Miswim.  
  
"Now I shall take you down, I get another letter."  
  
An 'N' appeared on the board above Miswim's head.  
  
"2 turns left, And I activate Great Trunade to remove all your magic and trap cards, then Ghost Harpies attack his monster and his life points."  
  
The two ghosts charged at Bakura and his monster;  
  
"I activate rush recklessly on the one which is attacking your monster!"  
  
Shouted Miswim, powering the Harpy's spectre up to 3000 attack, as it swooped in for the final blow.  
  
"Not so fast, My face down card, switches your second harpies ghost to attack my monster, and seeing as summoned skull died, weakening it, it loses, and you lose 200 life points and your monster, as well as wasting your quick play magic card."  
  
"NO!"  
  
The harpy disappeared, taking Miswim's life points with her.  
  
"I place one card face down, then end my turn."  
  
"I use offerings to the doomed to reduce my life points, and to sacrifice witch of the black forest to summon Vessel of the spirit."  
  
Another white haired monster appeared;  
  
"With both these monsters on the field, they up each others attack by 500, giving them both 3000 attack and defence points, then I equip Bekurak with Megamorph again, andmy loyal servants now WIPE HER OUT!!!"  
  
The Vessel charged towards the Ghost, and out of a ring around its neck flew the demon, the vessel then sucked the ghost harpy into his ring, and they both attacked MIswim's life points directly, then the ghost harpy was released, unharmed.  
  
"Oh did I tell you?"  
  
Said Bakura;  
  
"Vessel of the spirit can remove any 1 ghost/spirit or fiend from the field for the battle phase."  
  
"You win."  
  
Said the Goth and walked out the door.  
  
I'm sorry if you disagree with your characters nationality. Or any mannerisms they may have picked up. My plan is not to offend any body.  
  
Sorry for the short chappie this time, but I wanted to have something between her battle with Mai, and Joey.  
  
(Mr. Towel disappears in a cloud of funny smelling smoke, leaving just the reader, north is the review button, behind you is the story, pick one exit.) 


	10. A bashed Bakura

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard  
  
Welcome back, and if you wish to enter, please also include attk, def points of your cards and their effect, unless it's a really common one, because I don't want to have to spend ages looking up every cards detail before they get played.  
  
I do not own yugioh, nor the concept of millennium item cards. Or this intro, anyone who guesses where the intro is from immediately gets to the second round  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You are about to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
Miswim ran into her room and started crying, Bakura listened to the Goth and was worried when he felt sorry for her.  
  
"Time for you I think."  
  
He said, and the Millenium ring around his neck glowed, making his hair droop. His duel disk flipped revealing a second deck in the white side, and exposing the white side as the one facing away from him.  
  
"Fine, you'll owe me one."  
  
I take over your body and force you to duel for terrible stakes against your will, and THIS? Is what I owe you one for.  
  
"Yeah, well you can't help doing that, I'd be cranky if I'd had to spend 3000 years trapped inside a piece of jewellery. I'm doing this because you care for that girl."  
  
I do not, I care for no-one, I'm doing this because she reminds me of a friend I had when I was still alive, and she will be a useful tool to my objectives.  
  
"Fine, well you still owe me one."  
  
The spirit stayed silent, as the English boy went to comfort Miswim.  
  
(The next day, corridor outside room 30/31)  
  
Ryou yawned as he woke up, the last thing he remembered, a baseball bat.  
  
Miswim dragged his body into his room,  
  
"There, that'll teach you to beat me, then come across all nice and British. Trying to take advantage of me... Huh!!"  
  
She grabbed his key from the coffee table and shut the door behind her as she left,  
  
"Now, to find that mutt."  
  
(Boat 2,)  
  
"Joseph Rover Wheeler!"  
  
Miswim strode onto the centre of boat 2's deck, holding a door remote.  
  
"I am here for our duel, show yourself!!! Or are you a cowardly dog?"  
  
"I'm here Miswim, you'll never defeat me."  
  
Said Joey stepping out from behind a handy potted plant.  
  
Miswim looked at him and snorted;  
  
"Hah, you answered to Rover."  
  
Joey's face turned red.  
  
"We shall proceed to the hotbox arena behind this door."  
  
"NO!"  
  
Everybody on the deck gasped  
  
"What did you say?"  
  
"I said no."  
  
Said Joey stepping forward.  
  
"We shall duel on the vertigo platform."  
  
Everyone gasped again.  
  
"The... what?"  
  
"The vertigo platform. Miswim, every time somebody has challenged me to a duel, its on their home turf. Weevil made sure I had a certain card. Mai did her phsycic trick, Bones got me in the graveyard."  
  
"Oh, its funny, now you come to mention it."  
  
"Mako duelled me in the middle of his aquarium, now this time, its my advantage, I have talked to the boat guys, and they agreed to let me duel on the blimp, this is where I duelled my best, now do you accept? Or are you a coward?"  
  
With this he slapped her lightly with his star-chip glove from duellist kingdom.  
  
Her face darkened, and her nose twitched. She flicked at a cross that hung around her neck;  
  
"You have yourself a deal there."  
  
(The world cup blimp, half an hour later)  
  
Misiwim came out of the cabin to see the field on which they'd be duelling.  
  
She wore a dark jacket over her black top, and her black dress billowed around her legs, she strode out onto the platform, opposite Joey.  
  
The platform rose.  
  
Miswim pulled off her jacket and flung it into the wind without looking; it circled down beneath them, and fell on the face of Ryou Bakura who had just left to search for his key. She was wearing a black off the shoulder top, and it revealed a black thorny rose tattooed onto her shoulder, she reached out and flicked a switch on her duel disk, which sprung to life, as she revealed another tattoo on her wrist, which formed, in Japanese characters, the words: 'the darkness is untold.'  
  
"So? What's it to be? Deck master?"  
  
"Alright, I pick Jinzo."  
  
"I pick my legendary beast, Anubis Noir."  
  
Miswim-----------------------------------Joey  
  
8000-----------------------------------------8000  
  
"Ladies first..."  
  
"Did your little harpy queen drill that into you? All right, I play a monster face down in defence mode. And activate Final destiny board."  
  
An 'F' appeared above her.  
  
"Now this'll be a short game. Your move."  
  
"Why isn't Jinzo destroying it?"  
  
"You mutt! You don't even know your own cards, jinzo only takes out traps, magic cards work fine, and since there's only 1 trap card in my deck...."  
  
"Damn. I summon one monster in defence, then end my turn."  
  
"Tick tock Joey, don't you remember yugi's duel with bakura? Yep, he told me all about it, you lose in 4 more turns, wait, its 3 now."  
  
Miswim said as the letter 'I' appeared above her head.  
  
"I summon one more monster face down, and end my turn. This'll be easier than I thought."  
  
The American reached to his deck.  
  
"Joey do you know what you're doing? You're gunna lose ya great knuckle- head."  
  
Shouted Tristan.  
  
"Shut up, my brother has a plan don't you Joey."  
  
Shouted Serenity.  
  
Yeah I do, and I got the cards ta do it, I just hope This gal don't do anything to change the position.  
  
"I summon one more monster face-down, your move."  
  
"You really do suck; I'll put a 3rd monster down to be on the safe side."  
  
The letter 'N' appeared above her head.  
  
"Your move."  
  
"I summon one more monster....Your move."  
  
Come on Joey you can do this.  
  
Thought Yugi.  
  
Just one more turn.  
  
The letter 'A' appeared as Miswim drew.  
  
"Aw, this is my last turn, oh well this is the easiest duel I've ever fought. I guess one more monster can't hurt. Your move Wheeler, and it better be a good one!"  
  
Tristan suddenly put 2 and 2 together, the number 4 was within his grasp.  
  
"Joey's going to summon the.....mmmmph"  
  
He shouted as Yugi and serenity grabbed him to prevent him from ruining the plan.  
  
"Oh it is."  
  
Said Joey as he drew.  
  
"I sacrifice my flame swordsman, black panther, and swordsman of landstar to summon...."  
  
He held up the yellow card in the air.  
  
"The WINGED DRAGON OF RA!!"  
  
He slammed his hand down onto the yellow dog's ear that was supporting his cards, sweeping the 3 monsters into the graveyard in the same motion.  
  
A golden ball appeared in the sky, and he unlocked the dragon from within it, now I activate Raigeki!"  
  
Lightening bolts fell from the sky destroying all of Miswim's monsters.  
  
"Now, I transfer all but 1 of my life points to power up The winged dragon, now my god!!! Attack!!!"  
  
The Golden dragon flew towards the girl, and fired its energy beams at her, just before they hit, something appeared in front of her and a huge explosion obscured everyone's vision.  
  
A smoke ball stayed around Miswim, as Joey called out:  
  
"I win, now hand over my friend's cards."  
  
"I'm not dead!!"  
  
Came the voice from the smoke ball, and Miswim walked out unharmed.  
  
"Come again?"  
  
"I said: I'm not dead."  
  
"I think your life points will drop any second."  
  
"Actually I'm feeling a lot better?"  
  
"How could you? That was over 12000 attack power. Are you sure your life points aren't going to drop off soon?"  
  
"I'm fine; I had a card in my hand, which you'll recognize."  
  
"Huh?"  
  
Said Joey  
  
"The normal edition of Kuriboh, he can be sacrificed as a fuzzy shield to prevent one attack on your lifepoints."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Your mighty god was stopped by a kuriboh."  
  
"Oh.... Well I use mystical space typhoon to destroy your destiny board. That's that curse ended. Your turn."  
  
"Not quite. I activate the Ouija board. Which replaces the destiny board. Then I use my deck master's effect to destroy everything on your side of the field, and bring my side of the field back to my hand, with a penalty of a quarter of my life points of course."  
  
Miswim-----------------------------------Joey  
  
6000-----------------------------------------0001  
  
The winged dragon of Ra was absorbed by the seal of Anubis, causing Joey to be fling to the edge of the platform, where he unsteadily took his feet.  
  
"Get away from the edge fool!"  
  
This gave Joey an idea.  
  
"No!"  
  
"Joey!!"  
  
Yelled everyone on the field.  
  
"I love Mai, and I promised Ran I'd give him his card back. If you attack me, I will be so stoned that the force will knock me off this platform, maybe even off the blimp."  
  
Serenity ran into the cabin.  
  
"Now Miswim, I believe you are a decent person, and would you let an innocent person die?"  
  
"Death is a part of life, Anubis Noir, I summon you to the field."  
  
Her deck master walked out from behind her.  
  
"Before I attack, I'd like to tell you something, I just wish to tell you how Mai came to possess that ghost Harpy..."  
  
(Flashback, battle city.)  
  
"Miswim?"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"My name's Mai and I wish to challenge you to a duel."  
  
"Fine, I'll duel you."  
  
"I hear you are an occultist?"  
  
"I'm a Goth; to normal people we're all occultists."  
  
"Do you believe in psychic powers?"  
  
"I guess so."  
  
"I'm a psychic, and I wish to challenge you to a psychic duel, we can not look at our cards, until we play them, then we will pick them up to show which we have chosen, and play them, without showing them to the other person until they've been used of course."  
  
(Back on the blimp)  
  
"I agreed of course, I do have slight psychic powers, but Mai beat me easily using a combination of various perfumes."  
  
"She said she wouldn't pull that anymore!"  
  
"She lied, that ghost Harpy was mine to begin with. Why did you think I went straight after your little miss perfect harpy goddess? She stole one of my most powerful cards from me, and made me lose faith in my duelling skills, she tricked me, and for that she paid, now do you really consider it worth taking my card off me?"  
  
"Um.."  
  
"I thought not, I will not attack you, but I will not give you my harpy's ghost. I resign, but everybody knows who really won today."  
  
She powered down her duel disk, and a whumpth of in rushing air knocked Joey off his feet, Miswim dived for him, and grabbed the floppy ears of his duel disk.  
  
"You do care."  
  
"Quite hound."  
  
Miswim muttered under her breath.  
  
"I'm only doing this for your sister."  
  
Joey heard his duel disk click as she pulled him up, and handed him his barrel dragon.  
  
As soon as the platform Miswim jumped down and walked back to her cabin on the blimp.  
  
As it descended she looked out the window.  
  
"I won that duel."  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------- (L space)  
  
I'm sorry if you disagree with your characters nationality. Or any mannerisms they may have picked up. My plan is not to offend any body.  
  
Oh and last chapter I meant ultimate offering, not offerings to the doomed.  
  
(Mr. Towel disappears in a cloud of funny smelling smoke, leaving just the reader, north is the review button, behind you is the story, pick one exit.) 


	11. All about Kaibas

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard  
  
Welcome back, and if you wish to enter, please also include attk, def points of your cards and their effect, unless it's a really common one, because I don't want to have to spend ages looking up every cards detail before they get played.  
  
I do not own yugioh, nor the concept of millennium item cards. Or this intro, anyone who guesses where the intro is from immediately gets to the second round  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You are about to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------- (Boat 1, deck)  
  
"Big brother, did you here Joey copied what you pulled at duellist kingdom to beat some Goth girl."  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"Where you threatened to jump off the castle to save me, Joey was duelling her on the blimp, and was about to lose, so he threatened to jump."  
  
"I didn't know the kid had it in him. Did the Goth beat him?"  
  
"No, she resigned. I'll see you later, I got to meet some guy."  
  
Mokuba ran off.  
  
"See ya..."  
  
Said Seto looking around,  
  
"I better find myself a duel."  
  
(Boat 5)  
  
"Ok Newbies, listen up, I'm going to challenge you to a duel, and if one of you don't accept, by the end of tomorrow, everybody will know that you are sucky newbies."  
  
"I accept."  
  
A muscly guy walked up to Mokuba,  
  
"You want to duel kid, I duel, jus' don't go talking smack talk, especially if you're one so young."  
  
"Fine."  
  
Mokua pulled his duel disk out of his back and slipped it on his wrist.  
  
"I got a monster that is almost unbeatable."  
  
"Fine kid, you go first, shall we put 1000 points on this duel?"  
  
"How about all or nothing? No deckmasters."  
  
"What? Fine, I guess, you go first."  
  
"No, you can."  
  
"Fine, I put 1 card face down and summon spirit of the flames in attack mode. Your move."  
  
A Firey demon rose out of a patch of flames on the field, it flexed its muscles at the young Kaiba.  
  
"I activate harpies feather duster."  
  
The man's trap card disappeared in a wave of a semi-visible wing.  
  
"Then I summon the machine monster Gradius then I activate a 7 completed, taking his attack points up to 1900"  
  
The fighter jet flew out of the shadows, and grew 5 extra laser cannons.  
  
"Now I use a move my brother taught me. I special summon 2 Gradius' options, which take on the attack and defence of my Gradius."  
  
2 shells were fired from Gradius, which transformed into identical copies of Mokuba's Gradius.  
  
"Next I activate the magic card Limiter Removal, which doubles all machine monsters attack points for one turn, now attack his spirit of the flames Gradius!"  
  
The original flyer flew at the fire demon, then its lasers overloaded and blew it up. The man lost 2100 life points.  
  
"Now my clones, destroy his life points!!"  
  
The cloned fighter jets overloaded their laser beams into the man, he sucked in wave after wave of marijuana, losing 2 sets of 3800 damage. He lost  
  
The 3 fighter jets exploded and the fog dispersed.  
  
"Your deck please."  
  
The stoned man handed over his deck with no words.  
  
Mokuba leafed through it.  
  
"I'll take your Kazjin of thunder monster, thank you."  
  
Mokuba walked away to find another duel.  
  
(Boat 1)  
  
"Now I activate polymerisation to fuse my deck master blue eyes with the 2 in my hand, to create the blue-eyes-ultimate dragon. Can your deck master stand against me?"  
  
His deck master flew over his head, then 2 others came out of the fog, flying upwards with it, they flew so close, they were almost indistinguishable from each other, then a beam of light shot up from his deck, fusing the 3 together, creating the beast of legends.  
  
Seto Kaiba---------------------Ash Ketchum  
  
8000-------------------------------------4500  
  
"Ha, you can not hurt me, because monsters can't attack directly after they've been fused."  
  
"Well there's a funny story about that, you see, the blue eyes deck master has a choice of abilities Either it attacks straight away after fusing, or it can transfer its attack points to my monsters; I chose the first one, Blue eyes ultimate dragon!!! ATTACK!!!!!!!!"  
  
"My Pikachu can save me!!!"  
  
With this the mad pokemaiac threw a cage at Kaiba, it contained a mouse spray painted yellow, Kaiba dodged.  
  
"I win, and I think you're insane, I mean realy, who takes a computer game so seriously?"  
  
"Pikachu lightening bolt attack!!"  
  
"You knew that wouldn't work, you're just embarrassing yourself."  
  
"It could of worked."  
  
"Now give me your deck so I can pick one card, then you can take your mouse home, because your out of points my friend."  
  
Kaiba leafed through the boy's deck.  
  
"I'll take this; Suijin."  
  
He strolled away.  
  
(L-space)  
  
Another short chappie,  
  
I'm sorry if you disagree with your characters nationality. Or any mannerisms they may have picked up. If by any jokes I made, some people get offended, I am seriously sorry, I only wish to entertain....  
  
OH GOD WHY WON'T THEY LET ME ENTERTAIN????  
  
PLEASE LORD TELL ME WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY YYYYYY................................  
  
(Mr. Towel disappears in a cloud of funny smelling smoke, leaving just the reader, north is the review button, behind you is the story, pick one exit.) 


	12. The Millenium Dog?

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard  
  
Welcome back, and if you wish to enter, please also include attk, def points of your cards and their effect, unless it's a really common one, because I don't want to have to spend ages looking up every cards detail before they get played.  
  
I do not own yugioh, nor the concept of millennium item cards. Or this intro, anyone who guesses where the intro is from immediately gets to the second round  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You are about to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Yugi/Yami's room)  
  
"Yugi, please can I borrow your millennium puzzle?"  
  
"What do you mean Joey?"  
  
The shorter boy turned to his friend.  
  
"Please Yugi, I need Yami to help me learn how to be a stronger duellist, I basically lost to that Goth kid, look please dude, Yami's helped teach me about the heart of the cards, and now I need him again."  
  
"I suppose 1 day won't matter, right?"  
  
Yami, could you please help Joey?  
  
Yugi, I will do this, but you must promise to let me eat at dinner. I so miss the taste of food.  
  
Thanks Yami.  
  
Yugi looked at his friend;  
  
"Joey, the millennium puzzle won't let you contact Yami unless you beat the previous owner in a duel."  
  
They each pulled out their decks.  
  
"Joey, I'll go first, I summon Kuriboh in attack mode."  
  
"I activate polymerisation, fusing together the summoned skull, and red eyes black dragon, from my hand, and then I activate metalmorph, megamorph, and limiter removal. Now I activate quick-attack so that my monster can attack you straight away."  
  
The black skull dragon now had 140,000 attack points, and as they weren't playing with the duel disks, Yugi removed his Kuriboh, and crossed his life points off the piece of paper they'd scavenged for a life point counter.  
  
"Well done Joey, you win, when did you get those cards?"  
  
"When Marik took me over, I got a bunch of rare cards; I created an extra deck with them so that I could surprise you."  
  
"Well done Joey, you deserve it, here."  
  
Yugi unhooked the millennium puzzle from his neck and handed it to Joey.  
  
"See ya later dude, thanks."  
  
Joey slipped on the puzzle and walked out the door to his own cabin.  
  
Yugi picked up his hand, and shuffled it into his deck, including the card 'bottomless trap hole.'  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---------------  
  
(boat 1)  
  
(5 hours later)  
  
"Sir, a duellist has been found with a deck containing Exodia!"  
  
"Really? Where? I must have it!"  
  
"Boat 2, on the deck outside the arena."  
  
"On my way!"  
  
Kaiba turned off his phone and ran towards boat 2. (Joey's room (5 hours ago))  
  
Joey went in and sat down on his bed,  
  
"Ok Yami its time for us to have a little talk."  
  
(Joey's soulroom)  
  
Joey woke up in his soulroom and looked around,  
  
"I've been here in my dreams before"  
  
"Hey, I can't think inside my own head, I keep talkin'"  
  
"Must... Not.... Think..... About..... That.... Night.... When......... I...... Saw...... Tea...... hey look at that, a door, I've never seen that there before."  
  
Joey walked towards the door, he opened it and looked up and down the corridor, there was one door opposite him, and as he looked up and down, there were hundreds of rooms lining the corridor.  
  
"None of those rooms have doors, but this one does, hey it has a picture of the millennium puzzle on it."  
  
Joey tried to turn the handle, but it wouldn't turn.  
  
"Hey.... It must be locked, but I won that duel, wait.... There's a slot under the door, big enough for one card. I must have to insert the card that I won with, hey how did I get so smart?"  
  
Joey reached for his fusion deck and pulled out his black skull dragon, which he slotted into the slot, the door opened......   
  
(Boat 2)  
  
"I am looking for a Mr. Edward Payne, can anyone help me?"  
  
"Yeah, I'm Edd, so what do ya want?"  
  
"My name is Mathew, I wish to duel you."  
  
"American, right?"  
  
"How... didyouknow Mr.... Payne?"  
  
"Only an American could fake an English accent like that."  
  
"Iwishto...doubleduel... you Mr...... Payne."  
  
"Okay, Rob, me and you against him, deckmasters."  
  
"Hey dude, who's your partner."  
  
"I... Don'thaveone Mr...... Machin. I was hoping one would......showup."  
  
"I'll do it."  
  
Miswim strode onto the scene.  
  
"I've heard you have some powerful cards Mr. Edd, I wish to win them."  
  
"Your funeral."  
  
"Reay? MrPayne?"  
  
"You betcha."  
  
"Okaythen, letusproceed." (Yugi's room.)(earlier)  
  
"Wow, it feels so weird without Yami with me, I'll have him back soon, I'll just wait here till Joey gets back."   
  
(Yugi's room but a different point of view)(Still earlier)  
  
Shadows line the corner of your vision, gold streaks appear everywhere, the mysterious interloper looked over at Yugi and saw a ying without a Yang,  
  
That's weird.  
  
He thought to himself as he reached over to the coffee table and put back the book he had borrowed earlier.  
  
He walked over to the nearest wall;  
  
"Wow, it feels so weird without Yami with me, I'll have him back soon, I'll just wait here till Joey gets back."  
  
The interloper paused, and then stepped through the wall, the other side of the wall, a thin smoky outline formed from dark fog that was seeping through the wall, a long haired boy was materialising.  
  
"Must.... Fight it....."  
  
His eyes glowed red.   
  
(Boat 2) (The present)  
  
Mathew thumbed open the control to the garage door behind them.  
  
They all walked in and the doors slammed shut behind them.  
  
"Hey! What gives?"  
  
Shouted Rob.  
  
"Nobody.... Leavestillitsover."  
  
"Well aren't you a happy person."  
  
"We'll be...usingthehotbox rules for this one, there is a.... arenahere, sono...dueldisksneeded. Ohand MrPayne?....I have... Exodia."  
  
"We can beat you..... Right Edd?"  
  
Edd looked down and said;  
  
"If it's as good as the last Exodia deck I faced, he could win."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"It beat me last time."  
  
Edd slotted a side deck into his main deck,  
  
"But I came prepared."  
  
"4000 lifepoints each... boys...addingupto.... 8000, ohand.... Allornothing, letsgo."  
  
"Let's Duel!!!"  
  
Shouted Edd and Rob as the speakers played the kill bill soundtrack, and they ran to their positions, Mathew flipped to his and Miswim ran to hers.  
  
Everybody slammed their deckmasters home.  
  
Noir Anubis rose behind Miswim, and a creature shrouded in black rose behind Rob, while the floor under Edd and his field turned to stone, and a shadowey blob rose behind Mathew.  
  
(Soul corridor.) (Earlier)  
  
The door started glowing and Joey pulled his card out of the slot, and then the door disappeared, and the other side was.....  
  
Yami.  
  
"Hello Joey."  
  
"Uh, hi Yami."  
  
"We must begin your schooling, first off to communicate with me, just think, and I shall hear."  
  
"So I get no privacy till you go back to Yug?"  
  
"Not now that you have unlocked my soul door."  
  
"How do I return to my body?"  
  
"Just return to your soul room and lie on the bed and close your eyes, you should wake up in your cabin. Though it is different for everybody."  
  
"Shall I leave my door open?"  
  
"No! You must not, for there are fearsome beasts that roam these corridors. I can enter your soulroom at will, and you mine, until the puzzle gets won."  
  
"Okay, so you know about when I saw......"  
  
Yami quickly interrupted him.  
  
"I only can hear your thoughts that are at the top of your mind. If you don't think it then I don't know it."  
  
"Ok, so...I won't...think... about...."  
  
"JUST GO BACK TO YOUR BODY!!!"  
  
Yami quickly shouted before he heard anything that would embarrass either of them. He was used to sharing his thoughts with Yugi, but didn't want to invade Joey's privacy.   
  
(Boat 2) (The present)  
  
Kaiba ran out onto the deck of boat 2;  
  
"Where are they? I must get a hold of that Exodia deck."  
  
He looked up to a TV screen that hung from the cabin, above a garage door.  
  
Kaiba looked through the TV screen, the camera panned around the room, the Goth was playing a double duel, against 2 teenagers, 1 with orange hair, and one with dark brown, he looked at her companion, and it was the Exodia duellist!!!  
  
And round his neck, was......  
  
Yugi's Millenium Puzzle.  
  
(Joey's cabin.)  
  
"Ok, I'm back in my body AH!"  
  
Yami appeared in an incorporeal body.  
  
Joey looked down,  
  
"Jeez man, your short, I mean, when you take Yugi's body he grows, but, you're a midget, and is that my body you're wearing?!?!"  
  
Yami did indeed look like a shorter Joey, his green shirt billowing like a cape, his blond hair was stuck up in points, in the usual style of Yugi.  
  
"Ahem."  
  
Yami coughed.  
  
"By the way, I can not hear your thoughts when I am in my incorporeal body."  
  
Ah, phew, finally, I can think about that time I walked in on Tea.....  
  
"Joey!!"  
  
Yami clicked his fingers in front of Joey's face.  
  
"We must head to boat 6, there are many new duellists there, they have little experience, but many have powerful decks."  
  
"Gotcha."  
  
(DoubleDuel arena) (The present)  
  
Mathew shouted above the music: "Youstart... first MrPayne."  
  
Edd drew, and playing graceful charity, he discarded a des lacooda and a giant trunade, and then brought des lacooda face down with a shallow grave, after summoning a monster face down. Then after placing 2 cards face down, he ended his turn.  
  
Miswim placed a monster face down, and two trap cards.  
  
Followed by Rob laying 2 traps and a monster in defence.  
  
"You sure we can do this Edd?"  
  
"Yep."  
  
"Let's whoop their butts."  
  
Then Mathew activated the magic card graceful charity, he discarded two pieces of exodia, and placed 1 card face down, then summoned cannon soldier on the field.  
  
The blob behind him grew two legs.  
  
"Mr.Paynedoyou....know what I... meant when isaid..... allornothing......"  
  
"Yeah, we pool all of our points, then the winning team splits them in half between them."  
  
"NoImeant.... Yourwholedeckas..... well."  
  
"What? I'm not doing that!"  
  
"ToolateMr.Payne.... You already agreed. Yourmove."  
  
(Boat 6.) (4 hours ago.)  
  
There are plenty of duellists here, challenge one, any one to a duel.  
  
"Anybodywanta.... Duel?"  
  
Not him.  
  
"Why not?"  
  
Joey muttered under his breath.  
  
look at him through your eyepiece.  
  
Joey turned around and looked at the boy.  
  
Mathew Perriwinkle  
  
Nationality: American  
  
Age:18  
  
Point total: 3000  
  
Normal duelling strategy: Exodia  
  
Duels played in tournament: 2  
  
"This is perfect Yami, I'll win Exodia for Yugi, prove I'm really good, and he's already lost at least one duel."  
  
If you're sure  
  
Joey failed to notice the line at the bottom of the screen;  
  
Average points bet per duel, 500   
  
(DoubleDuel arena) (The present)  
  
"Ok, my friend, I draw, then I flip des lacooda and draw again, and he flips himself face down again. Then I flip spear cretin and sacrifice him for summoned skull, owing to his special effect, he returns to the field, face down once again. Your move Miswim."  
  
"I summon Dark Blade, and attach Axe of despair, now he has 2800 attack points, now, attack his summoned skull!"  
  
The monster jump towards the summoned skull, swinging its blade. Then he smashed it towards the summoned skull, causing a cloud of dust to rise around Edd and his monster.  
  
(Boat 6) (4 hours ago)  
  
"Sothe.... Winnergetsthe.... Other'sdeck?"  
  
"That's right."  
  
Said Joey, risking his new powerful deck.  
  
You realise that you have a small chance of summoning Ra, and even if you do, to have acquired 'Exodia' as his standared tactic, he must have ome top notch strategy to bringing it into play.  
  
"I owe Yugi Exodia, well actually Weevil does, but he's not in this tournament."  
  
A spiky green head disappeared behind a shed.  
  
"I will duel you Mathew!"  
  
Shouted Joey.  
  
"Fine,Iwishto... usedeckmasters."  
  
This'll be easier than I thought.  
  
Good idea Joey, use Ra as your deck master.  
  
No I was going to stop him using traps with my jinzo.  
  
Joey, you can bring Ra to the field at anytime if he's your deck master, use a magic card to clear the field of monsters and traps don't work on the god cards....  
  
I know Yam, I know, I was jus' kiddin'.  
  
I can't afford to make that kinda mistake again.  
  
Yami didn't tell his friend he'd heard that part, and Joey searched through his deck.  
  
Ra... It's not here!  
  
(DoubleDuel arena) (The present)  
  
Edward clicked a button on the side of the arena, and the smoke cleared.  
  
"Now I shall... What the hell?"  
  
Where the cloud had cleared, sat a wall.  
  
3000Def  
  
The dark blade's sword shattered and Miswim lost 300 life points.  
  
"What just happened?"  
  
"My deck master."  
  
Responded Edd.  
  
"Whenever you attack my monsters or my life points, if I wish, Labyrinth wall, my deck master can protect my field, hell, from now on, you can't even see what cards me and Rob have behind here."  
  
Their two opponents looked at there screens, where it normally listed the opponents card, it just had coloured blobs indicating that a covered card was there.  
  
Miswim grumbled.  
  
"I'll place one card face down and end my turn."  
  
(Boat 6) (4 hours ago)  
  
I can't find Ra, that Goth must have stolen it when she pulled me up. It was on the top of my graveyard.  
  
Don't panic, tell him you'll duel him later, and we'll go find Miswim.  
  
"K, mate, someone nicked my strongest card, so I'll go get it, then duel you later, that allright?"  
  
"Slightproblemjoey..... we have...... alreadystarted..... youcanforfeitmeyourdeck.... Right now if you want."  
  
"Nah, we'll duel."  
  
Fine, I will use Jinzo.  
  
"I summon Jinzo as my deck master."  
  
"And I, Exodia Necross!!"  
  
"Ah, you do know you can't summon that to the field till you use its magic card."  
  
"YesMr.Wheeler..... Iresearchmy...... cards before........ Iplaythem."  
  
This'll be a piece of cake, Yami, his deck master has pretty much no effect, apart from he can reshuffle exodia into his deck, if any of the parts goto his grave.  
  
"Leyts duel!"  
  
"£$BABYKANGAROOOOOOJEEOH$£"  
  
A dog's face appeared over the millennium puzzle and Joey shrank in size, his hair sticking up, and his coat nbillowing like a cape. His dogs ears on the duel disk sprang to attention, and he pushed jinzo under the dogs chin.  
  
"You can go firstwheeler."  
  
"Fine."  
  
Joey summoned harpy's brother and placed 2 cards face down.  
  
Mathew played pot of greed, and then summoned one monster face down.  
  
"Huh, not that scary, first I summon rocket soldier, then I attack your face down monster with harpy's brother, then rocket soldier can get your life points."  
  
The battle sequences were acted out by the holograms, Joey's rocket soldier taking 1500 off Mathew's life points.  
  
"Nicely... donemrwheeler..... nowasthatwas.... Witch..... oftheblackforest, I take Exodia'sleftlegto... My hand."  
  
Don't worry Joey, use your card destruction next turn.  
  
Yeah, yeah, I'd a' done it anyway.  
  
Mathew summoned one more monster face down.  
  
"Now I'llusemonster......... rebornto bringmywitch backtothe field........, inoffensive.... Mode. Yourmove.... Wheeler."  
  
If I attack, he'll get another piece, and then I can send them both to the grave in the same turn.  
  
Go for it.  
  
"I summon swordsman of landstar, harpy's brother attack his face down monster, rocket soldier, his witch, and swordsman of landstar, attack his life points.  
  
The attacks went through, and Mathew took an exodia leg, and an arm from his graveyard as his sangan disappeared.  
  
"This'llbe...easierthanIthought."  
  
"Not so fast, I activate the magic card Card destruction."  
  
Joey NO!  
  
What I do now?  
  
You should have put your soul release on the field first, now his exodia cards stay in the grave.  
  
Oh well, at least he doesn't win straight away with them there.  
  
No, but look.  
  
The dark version of exodia's legs and arms became more defined, it's as if he was growing out of a black blob.  
  
"Oh shit."  
  
Yes indeed.  
  
Agreed the pharoh.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -----------------------------  
  
I'm sorry if you disagree with your characters nationality. Or any mannerisms they may have picked up. My plan is not to offend any body.  
  
If anybody in the tournament tells me where I've stolen the new American from, then they automatically gets to the next round.  
  
(Mr. Towel disappears in a cloud of funny smelling smoke, leaving just the reader, north is the review button, behind you is the story, pick one exit.) 


	13. An evil cliff hanger

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard  
  
Welcome back, and if you wish to enter, please also include attk, def points of your cards and their effect, unless it's a really common one, because I don't want to have to spend ages looking up every cards detail before they get played.  
  
I do not own yugioh, nor the concept of millennium item cards. Or this intro, anyone who guesses where the intro is from immediately gets to the second round  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You are about to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------- (4 hours ago, boat 6)  
  
"Ahwell.... Done. Youseemtohave... defeatedmy.... Exodia.....hehnot....likey."  
  
Mathew discarded 3 cards, including exodia's head, the dark figure behind the boy grew completely into focus.  
  
"Mwahahahahahayou shall soonfeelthewrathof.... Mydeck........ master. Iplaceonecarddownonthefieldthen..... Yourmove."  
  
Joey drew.  
  
Wait Joey.  
  
He stopped.  
  
What is it Yami?  
  
He has no monsters on the field.  
  
Yeah and?  
  
Well that face down card's a pretty obvious trap don't you think?  
  
Jinzo stops traps.  
  
Yeah, but quick-play magic cards?  
  
Good point.  
  
"Ok, I'll use my magic card Harpy's feather duster!"  
  
No, not yet.  
  
The feather duster swept over the field, destroying a mirror force.  
  
"What?"  
  
I tried to warn you, it was a bluff.  
  
Well excuse me, Mr. Know it all.  
  
"Now, my monsters! ATTACK HIS LIFE POINTS DIRECTLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
Jeez, calm down, would ya Joe?  
  
Jeez, where did chandler come from, oh holey-moley, he's stuck in MY HEAD, AH GETOUT!!  
  
"Not.... sofast!"  
  
As Mathew laid a card down onto his duel disk, and a brown puff-ball appeared in front of the harpy's brother, and exploded, leaving Joey's monsters unharmed, but Mathew with 100 life points.  
  
"Now..... myturn."  
  
Mathew drew.  
  
"Now, I win, I activate Raigeki, destroying all of your monsters, then I activate contract with exodia to summon my deck master to the field, and finally, I eguip him with megamorph, to double his attack points to inflict 3800 points of direct damage to you, then he gets stronger for having been in combat, and because I play my magic card, double-strike, he gets to attack again!"  
  
The massive black figure ran towards Joey and swung one fist into him, then he spun around and slapped him across the face with the other hand.  
  
Joey choked on the smoke blown into his mouth and he grew back to his original size as the duel disks shut down.  
  
Joey, you must give me to him?  
  
Huh, why?  
  
I can no longer hear your thoughts, you got beaten, and you must give him the puzzle.  
  
"You won, here's my new deck, and my necklace thingy."  
  
"Yourwhat?"  
  
"I er.... I promised a friend that if I lost a duel, I'd give the winner my pyramid thing, so that he could... errr... find you and see if he could beat you, its this weird thing we do, then you give it to him."  
  
"O-kayyyyyyyyyyy........."  
  
Don't worry, he won't be able to use the puzzle's powers, you have to have a link to the past, or at least be psychic.  
  
Cool I'm psychic.  
  
Joey handed the puzzle and his deck he got of Marik to the exodia duellist.  
  
No you're not psychic, you have a link to the past, I don't really understand it that much, but I can sense psycicness, IT IS A WORD!!!  
  
I thought...  
  
No, I can't hear you, but I can project my thoughts to anybody, but I can guess what you're thinking.  
  
I could really use a...  
  
Cheeseburger, I know.  
  
Damn you to hell!  
  
Been there, done that.  
  
Grrrr...  
  
Growl like a dog Joey boy.  
  
Ok, I'm not going to think anymore, lets see you predict that.  
  
....  
  
Hehe it worked.  
  
Joey began to hum 'God damn right it's a beautiful day' in his head.  
  
Uh-huh  
  
Damn You!  
  
"WhoshouldI..... look for?"  
  
Joey said the first name that popped into his head, Yugi needed to prepare first, he remembered the boy who had hung with Yugi during Mai's duel with the Goth girl.  
  
"Uh... Edd Payne, oh and Rob Machin."  
  
"Iwill... findthem."  
  
The American walked away to find the English duellists, and Joey sat there, monging out.  
  
(doubleduel arena) (The present)  
  
"I summon one monster in attack mode behind Edd's labyrinth wall. Your move Mathew."  
  
"I........ activateshallowgravewhichletseverybody....... bringbackone monstertothe field face downindefence...... mode....... Your..... moveMr.Payne."  
  
"I activate my magic card Raigeki."  
  
A bolt of lightning slammed into each of the other teams monsters.  
  
"Now, II activate another magic card, since it is hidden in my labyrinth, you can not see it yet, but it is continuous so you will eventually find out."  
  
Miswim growled under her breath.  
  
"Now I summon one monster in face down mode, and flip my des lacooda so I get another card, then he hides under his card again, though, you still can't see that. Now, Summoned Skull, emerge from my labyrinth!"  
  
The skeletal monster marched out of the maze.  
  
"Now I activate my trap card robbing goblin. Whenever you lose life points you also lose one random card from your hand. So that one you just picked up from that sangan you just lost is at risk to."  
  
Suddenly a banging was heard on the door.  
  
"Open up!! IT's Seto Kaiba!!"  
  
"Whois... he?"  
  
"I have no idea."  
  
Said Edd.  
  
"We can't open the door until the duel's over mate, sorry!"  
  
Shouted Rob.  
  
"Yeah, hotbox rules, sorry 'dude'!"  
  
Shouted Miswim.  
  
"I was in the middle of my move?"  
  
"Ohyessssss.... Sorry."  
  
"Anyway, as I was saying, Summoned Skull! Attack Mathew directly."  
  
The skeletal figure raised its hands and shot lightning towards the American.  
  
"Notso....fast. I... activatemirrorforce!"  
  
As soon as the trap sprung up, a bolt of ruby red light sprung out of the darkness of the labyrinth and destroyed it.  
  
"Tut tut Mr Mathew."  
  
Said Rob, taking the piss.  
  
"You forgot to find out who my deck master was."  
  
"Onlyonemonsterhas the powerto destroy..... trapcards."  
  
"Well actually 2, but we won't get into technicalities."  
  
Jinzo's red eyes shone from the gloom as Mathew breathed in pure smoke, from the strongest form of marijuana harvested, and another Exodia piece was stolen from his hand by a mysterious creature, and dropped into the graveyard.  
  
"Now that you have 3 Exodia pieces in the grave, I shall use the magic card soul release to remove them from play."  
  
Mathew chuckled to himself.  
  
"Your move, milady."  
  
"Oh, so you English guys do have manners. Okay, I'll draw.  
  
Now I bring my own summoned skull to the field, by using the magic card a graveyard sacrifice and remove my dark blade from play. Now I power him up with a mask of brutality, and attack your summoned skull."  
  
The mask wearing skeleton fired arcs of electricity at the other one, it tried to fight back but got smashed into a section of the labyrinth wall.  
  
Miswim looked through her visor  
  
Labyrinth wall  
  
Defence 2000  
  
Health Points 2000  
  
"Mathew, when we damage monsters out side of his labyrinth, it damages the labyrinth."  
  
"Soif.... Wedestroythe.... Labyrinth... wecan.... Gethislifepoints...youdothat.... I'l....concentrateon.... exodia."  
  
"Gotcha. Okay Rob, your move."  
  
"Fine, I'll summon my spirit monster Inaba white rabbit"  
  
A torch appeared on the outer wall of the labyrinth, and then a ghostly rabbit swung itself into view.  
  
"Huh, is that all? My summoned skull can crush that rabbit easily."  
  
"Watch and learn, Inaba! Attack Mathew directly!"  
  
"Summoned Skull! Defend my partner!"  
  
The skeletal figure dived in front of the American, firing electricity at the ghostly form like a bad action hero firing his guns at an attacking Iraqi. The ghost passed through the summoned skull and dove into Mathew's chest.  
  
"ARGH!"  
  
The unwitting American inhaled 700 points of damage.  
  
"You only have 8000 life points now, stupid American. Now my spirit, return to my hand."  
  
The ghost dived back into the torch, and Rob picked it up from the field.  
  
"Now, your turn Mr. American type-person thingy!!"  
  
"Excellent,Iuse mining...... formagicalstones andIdiscardmy....... last2piecesof Exodia...... tobringback.... potofgreed, whichI...... playrightaway."  
  
The jar appeared, and shattered, delivering Mathew 2 more cards.  
  
He started to laugh.  
  
"Mr.Payne, yourdefeatisathandbecause.......... Iplaymyownsoulreleasetoremovetherestof.... Exodiafromplay!"  
  
Edd and Rob gasped theatrically.  
  
"ThenIplace one...... monsterandone..... cardfacedown and.... endmyturn!"  
  
Edd drew.  
  
"Okay, first, I'll pay 1000 life points to power up labyrinth wall, back to its full 3000 defence and health. Then I activate my trap card solemn wishes and flip des lacooda to gain another card and 500 life points."  
  
Edd: 3500 Rob: 4000 Miswim: 3800 Mathew: 800  
  
"Now I play power of doubles which allows us each to special summon 2 monsters from our hands straight away."  
  
"Now behind my wall, I sacrivice 3 face down monsters to summon one of my most powerful cards!"  
  
(Boat 2)  
  
"What? There are only 3 Egyptian God Cards, I have one, Yugi has the other one, nad the puppy dog should have the third, unless he's lost it in some dule or another."  
  
(doubleduel arena)  
  
"I summon Moisture Creature!"  
  
A billow of fog came over the roof of the labyrinth, carrying 3 indistinguishable monsters, they glowed white and swirled together, it turned into a bug eyed face, which grew until it almost obscured the entire labyrinth.  
  
A syringe-gun came out of the darkness, followed by a pink umbrella, a trap card activated and every creature on the field turned insect-like, moisture creature brandished its gun, and with one smooth motion, vaporized Miswim and Mathew's magic/trap cards.  
  
A green interlocking cobweb grew in front of Miswim and Mathew.  
  
"Now, moisture creature, attack Mathew!"  
  
The creature aimed its gun at the American and fired, Mathew laughed as a wall of fuzzy Kuribohs appeared in front of him.  
  
"You got lucky, now, Miswim?"  
  
"Thank you."  
  
Miswim drew, her eyes boggled at the card.  
  
She looked at her hand,  
  
"Edd you fool, I 2 now have 3 monsters on the field, and I sacrifice them to summon the most powerful monster ever created!"  
  
(Boat 2 deck)  
  
"What? Another 3 sacrifice creature? What can it be?"  
  
(doubleduel arena)  
  
"I sacrifice my 3 monsters to summon.........."  
  
"AH!"  
  
"Uh?"  
  
"Who?...What?"  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -----------------------------  
  
(Back in L-space)  
  
I'm sorry if you disagree with your characters nationality. Or any mannerisms they may have picked up. My plan is not to offend any body.  
  
If anybody in the tournament tells me where I've stolen the new American from, then they automatically gets to the next round.  
  
(Mr. Towel disappears in a cloud of funny smelling smoke, leaving just the reader, north is the review button, behind you is the story, pick one exit.) 


	14. The Millenium Hamster

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard  
  
Welcome back, and if you wish to enter, please also include attk, def points of your cards and their effect, unless it's a really common one, because I don't want to have to spend ages looking up every cards detail before they get played.  
  
I do not own yugioh, or garth merengie's Darkplace, nor the concept of millennium item cards. Or this intro, anyone who guesses where the intro is from immediately gets to the second round  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You are about to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------- (doubleduel arena)  
  
"I Summon My Egyptian God Monster!! The Winged Dragon of Ra!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
The golden spirit shot out of the card as it appeared in the arena and locked itself into a golden ball; Miswim mumbled an incantation, displayed on her visor, and the golden orb transformed into Ra.  
  
(Boat 2)  
  
The crowd watching the duel gasped, and Kaiba frowned.  
  
"I can't believe even the puppy dog managed to lose the winged dragon of Ra, that's the most powerful monster in the game! That Goth must have stolen it from him, after their match. Typical Wheeler."  
  
(Bakura's room)  
  
"So, you think I have a crush on the dark one do you?"  
  
"Well, I'd say yeah, she's the first person you've defeated in a duel who you haven't sent to the shadow realm."  
  
To the untrained eye, it looked like the silver haired boy was having an argument with himself.  
  
"She's just someone I can use to further my plans."  
  
But to someone who was watching carefully, the shadows darkened when the first voice spoke, and he used a harsher tone with his words, whereas the second voice carried smatterings of a British accent.  
  
"Sure, further your plans.."  
  
The boy said this last part with a wink, and an intonation that smelt strongly of affairs of the bedroom.  
  
"Get your mind out of the gutter Ryou, and how come you're talking of the shadow realm with such flippancy?"  
  
"Behkura, I'm used to it, you've lost that edge which scared me, and I've come to understand you better, you're not insane like Marik's dark side was. You protected me from Yugi's Egyptian god...."  
  
"How many times do I have to tell you?"  
  
The darker side interrupted.  
  
"You don't have enough strength to survive an Egyptian god attack, it would have killed you, my dark powers protected me, but without your body I'm dead. Now the god's have been sealed away permanently, the cards possess no real power at all."  
  
"Fine, whatever, listen, I'm going for a walk with Tea, stay in the ring!!"  
  
"Fine, fine."  
  
With this the ring suspended on the figure's chest stopped glowing, and the duel disk settled on the white side, it having been rotating madly throughout this conversation.  
  
(Double duel arena.)  
  
"The monsters I sacrificed where summoned skull, and two of my ghost harpies, giving my winged dragon a total of 6100 attack points. Now, Attack , my DARK BEAUTY, ATTACK HIS MOISTURE CREATURE!!!"  
  
Rather than its normal attack, the mythical dragon body slammed the ghost- like creature into the labyrinth wall, smashing it to pieces, it got up and strode back to Miswim's side of the field, while the moisture creature evaporated.  
  
On the boys side of the field was two monsters, a face down one, and, on Rob's side, a thousand eyes idol.  
  
"Oh darn, my walls down, and I can't bring it back up unless I sacrifice 1000 more lp, than I wish it to have, pretty pointless really.  
  
"I end my turn."  
  
Before Rob began, Edd played a trap card.  
  
"Sorry about this Rob, but I need a turn, now."  
  
"Its ok, dude."  
  
"I activate Tag This card switches when me and another designated player take our turns, I designate Rob, letting me take control of the field."  
  
"I draw, raising my lp back to 4000."  
  
"Now, I activate des lacooda, to draw again, and raise my life points another 500. Then, I summon sonic bird, in defence mode."  
  
A bird appeared on the field, but no sooner had it arrived, then it fired a rocket pack, on its back, and zoomed into Edd's deck, returning with a card, which it handed over.  
  
"First, I use black illusion ritual, to sacrifice sonic bird for Relinquished, one of my favourite cards, which absorbs one of Mathew's 2 face down cards. Then, I activate Polymerisation to fuse Rob's thousand eyes Idol, with the relinquished still in my hand."  
  
(Boat 2)  
  
"What? How can this be?"  
  
The whole crowd turned to look at Kaiba.  
  
"2 Relinquished's? in one deck?"  
  
(Doubleduel arena.)  
  
"Now I have the almighty thousand eyes restrict, which paralyzes all monster on the field, enemies, and friend alike, now, Restrict! Absorb the Winged Dragon of Ra!!"  
  
The god card got sucked into the spell caster. But then something strange happened, rather than being consumed by the multi-eyed creature, Ra absorbed it, developing a thousand eyes on its body, and its wings getting coated by a dark, defensive substance.  
  
Once this was done, an infinite abyss appeared in its chest.  
  
"Wow, that was imprssive, now attack Miswim directly!!"  
  
The creature spun around, and swung its tail into Miswim, knocking her off her stand, her life points dropped to zero, and she got hit in the face by an enormous jet of smoke.  
  
"Edd, we better finish Mathew off quickly, this room's filling up with smoke, and after that attack, its going to get a lot stronger."  
  
"Agreed."  
  
"Mathew, your turn."  
  
"Finally.I.... first flip magicianoffaiththensummon.... Mysummonedskullby... sacrificing my monsterleftonthefield."  
  
A third horned skeleton appeared.  
  
"NowI, activate Miswim'saxeof.... Despair, andmymegamorph.... Making summoned skull morepowerfulthanthatgodthing..... FinallyIuseeffectjammerto..... stop 1000eye's parylyzing effecy......... Now.... Attackthethousandeyesrestrict!!!!"  
  
The summoned skull wheelded lightning at the god hybrid, it exploded, and since miswim couldn't take the damage, Rob was showered with 900 points worth of smoke.  
  
"Lastbut... notleastI'lluse.... Fissuretodestroytheremainingcreature........................ Yourmove....MrMachin"  
  
"I summon Inaba to the field again and attack your life points."  
  
"Your move."  
  
Rob concluded as he picked up his card.  
  
"OhnoI... haveonly100lifepoints... Ohwell."  
  
The American drew.  
  
"Finally.....first raigeki"  
  
A lightning bolt eliminated relinquished.  
  
"ThenIactivate.... locked emerald chest."  
  
The five pieces of exodia filed into a small box at the corner of the duel disk.  
  
"Thiscardnowrepresentsall5exodiapieces, it allowsmetotakeany...... 5cardsfrommygraveandputtheminthechest...... theycannotbegottoinanyway.......... Butnow....ifthiscardgoes...intomyhand......Ihave..... exodiainmyhandandwin!!!!!! Butitiscurrentlyinmygrave.......andsoIactivate: Contract With Exodia tobringmydeckmasterto.... Thefield....... Summonedskullattackedd... directly...."  
  
The super charged fiend pumped millions of volts of electricity into......  
  
A wall of Kuriboh's.  
  
"Rob, I'd have defended you if he'd attacked you."  
  
"Cule." "Grrrrrrrr.... ExodiaNecross!!!!! AttackEdd!!"  
  
This time the attack succeeded, the massive creature punched Edd for 1900 lifepoints.  
  
Miswim just lay on the floor monging out.  
  
"NowI... useshallowgraveto.... Giveuseachonemonsterback..... facedown....yourturnMr...... Edd."  
  
"Thank you. Now I'd be right in assuming that that monster face down on your field is what? A magician of faith? To get Exodia back?"  
  
"Youmaybe... right."  
  
"So I'll make it simple for you, the card which I brought back thanks to your shallow grave is one that is a staple in most decent Exodia decks, but in this case it will win me the match, I discarded it earlier. Now with me drawing, I get an extra 500lp, and I flip..........."  
  
(Boat 2)  
  
"When I win this Exodia deck I must look for this card, it sounds extremely powerful, if it can make or break an exodia deck."  
  
(Doubleduel arena)  
  
"Fiber Jar!"  
  
"What?thatis... ariskymove."  
  
"We each shuffle our deck, our hand, our field, and the grave together, and draw 5 new cards, it isn't that risky, cos it banishes your deck master to your deck, as he was on the field when It was played."  
  
"Butitwasn't.... destroyed..."  
  
"I know, you're still in the game."  
  
The 3 players shuffled their decks and drew.  
  
"YourealiseifI.... draw emerald chest....youlose."  
  
"That's a risk I have to take, nowI asummon spear cretin in attack mode, and wipe out your last 100 attack points."  
  
A diminutive creature hopped onto the field and stuck a small spear into Mathew.  
  
'500' appeared in the air above his head as he breathed in the last of the smoke.  
  
The pyramid around his neck flashed for a second, and he said clearly:  
  
"Here, take my two decks, spare the girl, I shouldn't have drawn her into this, and I'll give you my neck—chain in the hope we'll duel again, and you can give it back to me."  
  
Edd answered.  
  
"I'll take you up on that, as long as we get that winged dragon of Ra."  
  
"Done."  
  
The American handed over the cards and the millennium puzzle, and then fell into a slouch.  
  
The garage door opened, and fogs of smoke came out, stoning everyone who had been watching.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -----------------------------  
  
(Back in L-space)  
  
I'm sorry if you disagree with your characters nationality. Or any mannerisms they may have picked up. My plan is not to offend any body.  
  
And the American is not captain Kirk AKA William Shatner, nice try Derek, but you don't win, if you want a clue, he isn't really, and he lived in Ankh-Morpork.  
  
If anybody in the tournament tells me where I've stolen the new American from, then they automatically gets to the next round.  
  
(Mr. Towel disappears in a cloud of funny smelling smoke, leaving just the reader, north is the review button, behind you is the story, pick one exit.) 


	15. El mexicano

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard)  
  
Welcome back, and if you wish to enter, please also include attk, def points of your cards and their effect, unless it's a really common one, because I don't want to have to spend ages looking up every cards detail before they get played.  
  
I do not own yugioh, nor the concept of millennium item cards. Or Garth Merengi's darkplace, or Cheech or chong.  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You are about to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Boat 5)  
  
"Hey. Man, where the hell are we?"  
  
The bearded man lifted his head;  
  
"I dunno man, hey look at this."  
  
The Mexican showed his friend something on his arm, it was a duel disk.  
  
"When the hell did we get these, man? Aren't they some sort of game-thing?"  
  
His moustached friend answered,  
  
"Man, we got WASTED last night, I think I remember something about a tournament....."  
  
"You said we could get lots of draw from this tournament..."  
  
"Then you.... Said that your cousin could get us entered for Mexico."  
  
"Ah cool man."  
  
"Yeah..... How do you play this game?"  
  
"Its all easy man, these eye pieces tell us how to play, then we just follow the cards we draw, it'll be easy."  
  
"Cool, let's go get some draw."  
  
--------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Boat 2)  
  
"I told you we were going the wrong way."  
  
"Hey, man there aint much around here, so we're sure to find it somewhere. Let's ask that spiky haired kid, he looks like a stoner."  
  
The two Mexicans made there way over to where Yugi was sitting;  
  
"Hey, man you got any draw we can buy?"  
  
"Draw? Kangichaktoowik?"  
  
"What?"  
  
The Japanese kid sighed and put on his eyepiece.  
  
"Do you understand me now?"  
  
"Yeah, man."  
  
"Ok, what did you want?"  
  
"We're looking for some ganja man."  
  
"Ganja?"  
  
The other Mexican joined in;  
  
"Yeah, you know, ganja, weed, pot, reefer, cannabis..."  
  
Light suddenly dawned on the Japanese midget.  
  
"Ah, marijuana."  
  
"Yes, marijuana."  
  
The bearded Mexican looked at Yugi for a second before asking.  
  
"You do know where we can get some, right?"  
  
"Oh, yes, you can refill your duel disk at the counter, there is one on each boat."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Did you not here the rules at the start?"  
  
"No, we were... asleep."  
  
"Ah, when you duel, you breath in Marijuana when you lose life points. Would you like a duel now?"  
  
The two looked at each other and replied in unison.  
  
"Uh... O...K?"  
  
"Great, what are your names?"  
  
"I'm Cheech Marin, and this is my compadré Tommy Chong."  
  
"Who wants to duel me first?"  
  
"Uh, Tommy will."  
  
"Ok."  
  
Chong whispered to his friend;  
  
"Hey, man why I gotta go first?"  
  
"You get to try out the weed first man. I was being friendly."  
  
"You were just scared weren't you?"  
  
"Was not."  
  
"Shall we duel or what?"  
  
Yugi had begun fiddling with his duel disk, impatient for the match.  
  
"Ok"  
  
"Would you like to play with Deckmasters?"  
  
"Uh, yeah sure."  
  
"Ok, pick one monster from your deck and put it in the slot."  
  
Part of Chong's duel disk opened up as he began looking through his deck.  
  
"Um, I'll play this one."  
  
He said, laying the total defence shogun into the slot.  
  
His earpiece spoke up at that point in a slightly feminine voice.  
  
"Total defence Shogun can use his effect total defence barrier to destroy any monster that attacks your life points directly. A sacrifice of 500 life points must be made to make this effect work however. Fortunately for the less experienced duellist, total defence barrier activates automatically unless asked not to, the command 'stoic' is used to prevent your deck master from using his effect."  
  
"Wow man."  
  
"Impressive choice of deck master Mr. Chong, I'll use Dark magician, my favourite card."  
  
"What does that do?"  
  
"Normally, the players opponent doesn't find out until the effect is used, but seeming as I know total defence shogun's, I'll tell you Dark Magician's, it can duplicate any magic card on the field if I pay 1000 life points."  
  
At this point Chong's earpiece cut in again;  
  
"Magic cards are green, and there effects are written on them, you place them in the slots on the side of your duelling disk and press the button underneath them when you wish to use them, be careful for you only get 5 slots, and some magic cards carry on for ever, you can play as many magic cards as you want per turn, though you can only play them in your opponents turn If it is a quick play magic card, these have this symbol on the top under the name of the card."  
  
The symbol was displayed on Chong's earpiece.  
  
"Chong-san shall we duel now?"  
  
"Errr... yes?"  
  
"Then click the switch on the side of your duel disk to active, and don't get your fingers trapped."  
  
Chong flicked the switch, the half-fields swung out to meet each other and extended away from his hand, then they clicked into place.  
  
"You can go first."  
  
"No. errrr you go first."  
  
said Chong stalling for time.  
  
"Very well."  
  
Yugi drew 5 cards and Chong copied him, black, holographic smoke issued from the duel disks to simulate the shadow realm, and a gas mask popped out from each duel disk and attached to their respective owners heads.  
  
"What the hell's this for?"  
  
"That will release the marijuana when your life points are hurt."  
  
"Ah."  
  
His earpiece explained the basic rules to him and he watched Yugi's move.  
  
"I place 1 card face down, and summon gazelle, the king of mythical beasts in defence mode. Your turn."  
  
Cheech and Chon flipped out at the hologram that appeared before them  
  
"Ok, man.... I..... draw."  
  
Chong looked at his hand, he had an orange card called King's knight, a green card called pot of greed, a pink one called mirror force, a yellow one called 7 coloured fish, another orange one called Queen's knight, and another green one called mystical space typhoon.  
  
"Ok, first I play magic card... Pot of greed."  
  
He thumbed the card into the slot.  
  
That's a powerful magic card!  
  
"And I use my deck master's effect to copy it."  
  
Yugi coughed as he breathed in 1000 life points worth of damage, and they each drew 2 new cards.  
  
Chong got an orange sonic bird, and a blue hungry burger.  
  
"I uh... summon sonic bird in attack, and place two cards down."  
  
His earpiece spoke up;  
  
"Sonic Bird; can get one ritual magic card from your deck,  
  
You have 1 ritual magic card in your deck,  
  
Your ritual cards are: 1.burger recipe  
  
To get a ritual magic card choose the number of the card you would like.  
  
"Errr... 1?"  
  
A small beam of light searched through his deck, and then a tractor beam built into the disc transferred it into his hand.  
  
"Wow.... Trippy. I attack your monster."  
  
Sonic bird fired itself at the monster, but bounced off.  
  
"There attack and defence points are the same, my go?"  
  
"Uh... yeah."  
  
"I summon beta the magnet warrior in attack mode and switch gazelle to attack mode, then beta take out his sonic bird and gazelle attack his life points!!"  
  
Chong rose his arms to protect himself, and inadvertently hit the switch for mirror force, beta bounced off it into gazelle, destroying them both.  
  
"Wow... did I do that?"  
  
"I place one card face down then end my turn, you really got me that time."  
  
Yami would have figured that out, still I'll get him back.  
  
"I draw."  
  
Chong drew a magic card, he was beginning to get a feel for the game, it was one which he recognised Cheech's cousin giving them in Mexico.  
  
"I play the magic card, monster bong, this card drains my life points and lets my monster bong it up, doubling his strength for one turn."  
  
His sonic bird pulled out a bong, and used its jetpack to ignite it, as it filled up woith smoke, Chong's life points decreased, giving him a hit from the disk's pot release system.  
  
He began thinking more clearly.  
  
"This is good shit, man; now mystical space typhoon will destroy your newest face down card."  
  
Yugi's mirror force blew off the field, while the disk, moved the card into the graveyard.  
  
"Now my stoned sonic bird, attack his life points!"  
  
Yugi's life points decreased to 4200  
  
"Now I activate the trap Nutrient Z, which lets me get 4000 life points when you take away more than 2000 of mine."  
  
His life points went back up to 8200.  
  
"Your turn man."  
  
"Thanks, I draw."  
  
Now, the perfect combination, thank god Yami sealed away the power of the gods  
  
"Chong-san, I am afraid, you are going to lose now. I activate graceful charity to draw 3 new cards, then I discard my slither the sky dragon, and twisted kuriboh, then I use my face down monster reborn to bring back slither the sky dragon."  
  
The giant Egyptian god flowed out of Yugi's grave to Cheech and Chong's gasps of horror.  
  
"With 6 cards in my hand, its attack points are 6000, though if I activate my magic card megamorph, as my life points are lower than yours, it raises Slyther's attack power to 10000, and because your monster bong is only in effect on your turn, your sonic bird goes back down to 1400, so if I attack you, you'll take 8600 points of damage. Now do you want to resign, or do you want to get very high?"  
  
"I'll take the dope kid."  
  
"Slyther the sky dragon! ATTACK Sonic bird! Dragon pincer!"  
  
The Egyptian god flew up into the sky as high as it could, then swooped back down, and grabbed sonic bird in one of its claws, flew back up, spun round in the air, and lobbed it, directly downwards at Chong, the weed hit him like a sledge hammer, and he keeled over.  
  
"I'll have your monster bong please."  
  
Said Yugi, powering down his duel disk.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -----------------------------  
  
Next Time, Yugi faces Cheech, but can he defeat the Mexican without his millennium puzzle?  
  
"Haha, man, your sky dragon sucks balls compared to the magic card I just drew. You is gunna lose man!"  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -----------------------------  
  
(Back in L-space)  
  
I'm sorry if you disagree with your characters nationality. Or any mannerisms they may have picked up. My plan is not to offend any body.  
  
If anybody in the tournament tells me where I've stolen the new American from, then they automatically gets to the next round.  
  
(Mr. Towel disappears in a cloud of funny smelling smoke, leaving just the reader, north is the review button, behind you is the story, pick one exit.) 


	16. The return of the mutant evil cliffies

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard)  
  
Welcome back, and if you wish to enter, please also include attk, def points of your cards and their effect, unless it's a really common one, because I don't want to have to spend ages looking up every cards detail before they get played.  
  
I do not own yugioh, nor the concept of millennium item cards. Or Garth Merengi's darkplace, or Cheech or chong.  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You are about to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Boat 2)  
  
Seto watched as the red-headed boy and his friend walked off, he turned around and saw tournament officials pick up the two losers who had both passed out from the sheer power of the smoke.  
  
Behind him he heard a soft voice;  
  
"Kaiba, I have come for you!"  
  
He wheeled around to see a throng of people gradually dispersing, he noticed a green head, a kid with brown hair with a red cap, Espa Roba, Tristan Taylor and Ryou Bakura, he rounded on the silver haired boy.  
  
"Bakura! What was that?"  
  
"What was what Richard?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"My point exactly."  
  
The spirit of the millennium ring marched off haughtily.  
  
When he reached his room he locked the door and fazed out of his body, leaving Ryou in control.  
  
"She lost!"  
  
"Now you won't be able to talk to her."  
  
"Quiet you, she defeated Wheeler, but he got the points, now this Payne defeated her."  
  
"Wow, you really are smitten."  
  
"I am not!"  
  
He shouted.  
  
(?????)  
  
Miswim sat up; she was in a purple fog which stretched further than her eyes could see.  
  
"Where am I?"  
  
"I...."  
  
"I...."  
  
"I..."  
  
"I.."  
  
The echoes bounced back off nothing.  
  
She sat down and waited.   
  
(Boat 5)  
  
"Okay Marin-san. Your turn."  
  
"Call me Cheech, man."  
  
Said the Mexican.  
  
"As you insist Cheech-san, my name is Yugi."  
  
"Nice name man."  
  
"Thank you, shall we duel."  
  
"Sure, I pick this 'Fiend Megacyber' as my deck master."  
  
"I'll have Kuriboh. Let's duel!"   
  
(Bakura's room)  
  
"I've got to get back on track, Miswim was supposed to win me the millennium puzzle from that guy that defeated Wheeler, now Payne has it, and she's out of the tournament."  
  
"Fine, we'll beat Payne."  
  
"Either him or his friend have Ra and the other one has exodia, it's to risky, if only I could get my hands on another Egyptian god card, or a few more souls.  
  
HOW ABOUT ANOTHER MILLENIUM ITEM?  
  
"Who said that!?"  
  
Shouted the soul brothers together as they wheeled round looking for the intruder  
  
(?????)  
  
Miswim did not know how long she had waited there in the shadows, it all seemed familiar, but she couldn't recall where she'd seen it all before.  
  
A dark figure began to walk towards Miswim out of the mist, growing more pronounced with every step; it began as a dark outline, human shaped.  
  
As it got closer Miswim realised it was clutching something in its arms.  
  
It looked like... a doll....   
  
(Boat 2)  
  
Kaiba strode up and down the boat trying to think, who had said that to him? He already knew the answer to why, he was the best duellist in the world, and everybody wanted to beat him, Yugi only beat him last time because of luck, his new deck was unbeatable and he'd tested it against a computer simulation of Yugi's, and if Yugi beat it then it was proof that he was cheating somehow, probably that millennium puzzle.  
  
Kaiba looked up, he'd accidentally wandered over to boat 5, he looked round the corner and saw Yugi duelling.  
  
I'll leave you to the finals, once I've beaten you, I want you out of this tournament.  
  
Seto turned around and as he started to walk back to the rope bridge he thought he heard Mokuba's voice in the background   
  
(Yugi)  
  
"I summon my Queen's Knight to the field to join my King's knight, and then I use their special ability to summon Knave's knight to the field!"  
  
The 3rd knight appeared on the field.  
  
"As your nightmare steel cage is still in play, I can't attack, but neither can you, your turn!"  
  
Yugi Cheech  
  
7500 3000  
  
"Fine amigo, I draw."  
  
The Mexican pulled a card from the top of his deck "Haha, man, your sky dragon sucks balls compared to the magic card I just drew. You is gunna lose man! Now I use my deckmasters ability. Because you have 3 more monsters on the field than me, I can summon a level 5 or 6 monster with no sacrifice!"  
  
The only magic card on the field was Cheech's nightmare steel cage, which ended at the end of this turn.  
  
"So Behold, my bleached summoned skull."  
  
A pile of bones that nobody had noticed before on the floor started to rattle, the sun had bleached them an eerie white colour, they rattled some more, and Cheech's deck master ripped the cloak off his back and threw it on top of the remains.  
  
The cloak lifted slightly off the floor,, a horned head could be made out under its folds, it rose higher and a ribcage joined the head, then an arm, a leg, a hand.  
  
Finally a bony hand reached from under the cloak, and swung it around onto its back, and there stood a summoned skull, whiter than the sun, around him, the shadows were staved off by his shining brilliance.  
  
Oh shit  
  
Thought Yugi.  
  
That's one of those re-releases with an effect, what does it do?  
  
"Yeah, itssummoned skull, well, your move."  
  
The cage around Yugi evaporated.  
  
"Ok...."  
  
Yugi drew.  
  
(?????)  
  
Miswim looked at her duel disk on her arm; it looked the same as what was in the figures arms as it strode closer and closer, through the dark purple fog.  
  
It grew closer and she could make out a bald head, long pointed ears, no, long wasn't the right word, tall, they were tall pointed ears, like in fantasy depictions of an elf. She looked down at its legs; she could make out large boots that travelled up to a point next to the waist.  
  
She looked closer, it didn't make sense, but she could make out fire behind it, no, not fire, the spirit of fire, fire without any physical presence.  
  
Her thoughts were erratic.  
  
I still must be tired after that duel.  
  
She thought.  
  
The duel, the purple mist, that was where it was from, the fog was that which came out of the duel disks.  
  
She began to feel reassured and frightened as the thing approached her, she could make out body armour, and the bald head seemed to be... blue.  
  
(Boat 5)  
  
"Haha, I beat you, that's 8000 points for me, only 2000 more to go and I'll get to the next round!"  
  
"I'll duel you!"  
  
"Ha, sure, I'll whoop your....... Seto?"  
  
"Mokuba."  
  
The two brothers looked at each other.  
  
"Mokuba, why didn't you tell me you had entered?"  
  
"I tried, but you kept ignoring me, I eventually decided to surprise you at round 2."  
  
"Well, you're doing pretty well, you have more points than me, and I only have 6000."  
  
"I thought you'd be mad?"  
  
"Why would I be mad?"  
  
"The pot..."  
  
"No, best to try these things when you're young."  
  
"Seto... I'm 12.  
  
"So?"  
  
"Mokuba, how do you think I survived all those nights without sleep when I was 10? They laced my coke with speed, as long as you don't try anything that can hurt you, I'm fine with it, I mean you've got drunk right?"  
  
"Seto, I repeat, I'm 12."  
  
"Mokuba, that camera, the one in the rec room, the one you think doesn't work..."  
  
"Oh shit. What, you don't care?"  
  
"Not about that sort of thing, no, I care about you enjoying yourself, and I don't want you in danger, that's it."  
  
"Seto?"  
  
"And........ I am very, very stoned."  
  
"Ah."  
  
(?????)  
  
"Miswim."  
  
The voice didn't echo, it seemed harsh, like a sharp wind creeping over gravestones at night; it went straight to her brain, without the intervention of her ears.  
  
Wait a second, I lost that duel, I'm out of the tournament.  
  
The fog scared her more.  
  
"Miswim, I have come for you."  
  
Miswim scrabbled backwards; the floor seemed to be made of silver sand, reflecting light from some unknown source.  
  
Suddenly without warning, the creature lit up with a bright white light. The sand glowed at her face, for it was almost undoubtedly a female.  
  
Miswim stared in disbelief, she knew this creature.  
  
(Bakura's room)  
  
The millennium ring flashed and instantly Behkurah was in control.  
  
"Who are you and what do you want?"  
  
TOMB ROBBER, I SHALL TAKE WHAT I WANT WITHOUT ANYBODIES HELP, BUT IF YOU COULD ASSIST ME I'D BE EVER SO GREATFULL  
  
"Yes, but who are you?"  
  
The robed figure carried on without listening to Behkurah, in a voice that sounded like coffin lids clanging together.  
  
ALSO I SHALL GIVE YOU LONGER TO PREPARE  
  
"For what?"  
  
The hood turned to look directly at Behkurah, and for the first time in his life he knew true fear. Inside the hood he could see two large glowing blue eyes, and he noticed that the figure in black carried a scythe.  
  
FOR WHEN YOU FACE YOUR DESTINY   
  
(Boat 2)  
  
"I sacrifice my 3 knight's to summon Slyther the sky dragon!"  
  
The god flew onto the field, its scales rippling along its back as it coiled around Yugi, and Kuriboh, its head coming to rest on the field where the king's knight had once stood.  
  
"I only have 3 cards in my hand so Slyther's attack is 3000, still more than enough to destroy your summoned skull, go my god monster!"  
  
"Not so fast!"  
  
"Huh? You have no traps!?"  
  
"Yes, but monsterino down here has a special ability, when he gets attacked I can play one magic card from my hand."  
  
"Oh no."  
  
"That's right man, I use the power of mehico to destroy your monster, I play Mexican Burrito!"  
  
"That has ta be tha lamest card I ever saw."  
  
"Joey!"  
  
"Yep, I came bro."  
  
"Where's Yami?"  
  
"I uh, left him in me room, sarree."  
  
"It's ok Joey."  
  
Yugi laughed and turned back to face Cheech.  
  
"Cheech-san, with my friend here, Mexico doesn't stand a chance, proceed with your attack Slyther!"  
  
The god monster finished eating a taco, then flew into the air.  
  
"Uh Yug, I think you're forgettin' what Mexico's famous for."  
  
"What Joey?"  
  
Said Yugi, looking round.  
  
"That!!!"  
  
Shouted Joey as he ran out the way.  
  
Yugi looked up, and falling out of the sky as Slyther dove to attack Cheech's monster was........   
  
(Bakura's room)  
  
The robe suddenly became brisk and business-like;  
  
NOW, I AM LOOKING FOR ONE CALLED SIMON.  
  
"I know no-one called Simon, though I do recognise the name....."  
  
HE WAS FIRST ADVISER TO THE PHAROH IN EGYPT, 3000 YEARS AGO.  
  
"Isn't he dead by now?"  
  
NO  
  
The voice stated, as if it knew everything.  
  
THE MILLENIUM EYE, BRING IT TO ME.  
  
"How did you...."  
  
BRING IT!!!  
  
There was no disobeying that voice, Behkurah went straight for his bedside table.  
  
AND AS FOR WHO I AM, I HAVE MANY NAMES.....  
  
The figure in the robe struck a pose;  
  
I AM HE WHO IS INFINITE, THE DEFEATER OF EMPIRES, SWALLOWER OF OCEANS, THEIF OF YEARS, THE ULTIMATE REALITY, HARVESTER OF MANKIND, THE FINAL DESTINATION, BOATMAN OF THE RIVER STYX, I AM THE ONE 'GAINST WHOM NO LOCK WILL HOLD, NOR FASTENED PORTAL BAR;  
  
I AM DEATH!!!  
  
With this his eyes flared and he pulled back the hood of his robe woven of absolute darkness to expose a grinning skeleton head.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -----------------------------  
  
(Back in L-space)  
  
Now wasn't that an evil, evil cliffie.  
  
If anybody in the tournament tells me where I've stolen the new American from, then they automatically gets to the next round.  
  
(Mr. Towel disappears in a cloud of funny smelling smoke, leaving just the reader, north is the review button, behind you is the story, pick one exit.) 


	17. Reinforcements for evil cliffies

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard)  
  
Welcome back, and if you wish to enter, please also include attk, def points of your cards and their effect, unless it's a really common one, because I don't want to have to spend ages looking up every cards detail before they get played.  
  
I do not own yugioh, nor the concept of millennium item cards. Or Garth Merengi's darkplace, or Cheech or chong.  
  
Imagine a place, parrellell to a dimension.  
  
The sort of place you might find a weird mirror or a spooky door.  
  
My friend, you have just entered.....  
  
The stoner's realm.....  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(A cook Juggling with two knives)  
  
(The Winged Dragon Of Ra, and Slyther the sky dragon flying together towards a boat.)  
  
(Kaiba pointing at Obelisk the Tormentor)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(?????)  
  
"Ok, where am I?"  
  
"I?" "I?"  
  
"I?"  
  
The echoes bounced off nothing and returned to Miswim as she lay there in the silvery sand.  
  
The creature hissed back, in a voice that cut through the air like frost in a graveyard on a bitter morning.  
  
"You are in the place where Death fears to tread, the realm from which nobody escapes, my dear, you are in the shadow realm!" (Boat 4)  
  
"Are you the Kaiba brothers?"  
  
Seto turned around.  
  
"Yes we are, why?"  
  
"We challenge you two to a duel, all or nothing, all points, whole deck."  
  
"Mokuba? You up for it?"  
  
"Yeah Seto!"  
  
"We accept!"   
  
(Boat 5)  
  
Yugi stared blankly upwards as an enormous brown 'Thing' dropped from the sky and landed directly on top of him, the sky dragon flew at the summoned skull and was taken out of the air by arcs of electricity.  
  
Yugi almost fainted from the stench and the sheer power of the reefer being blown into his lungs.  
  
Yugi Cheech  
  
2000 3000 (Boat 2)  
  
"Alright Teá?"  
  
"Yeah Sora, I was just thinking."  
  
"What about?"  
  
"Well, Yugi has had many weird adventures, I've told you about them in the letters I sent you, but..."  
  
"But what?"  
  
"He never goes to the toilet."  
  
"What??"  
  
"He never goes to the toilet."  
  
"That's stupid Teá, why would you be stupid like that? I'm off to find a duel."  
  
(Bakura's room)  
  
Bekurah fetched the small orb.  
  
"Is this what you are looking for?"  
  
YES  
  
Death reached down and took it, examining it with his bony hand.  
  
Then, suddenly, without warning, he rammed it into Behkura's eye!  
  
The pain was so intense that Behkurah was forced back to his ring, and Ryou had to suffer the full blast of agony as the millennium eye seared his eyeball.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -----------------------------  
  
This is an animated short, where events unfold dramatically from the last chapter, next chapter will be a very long one, this is just to give you a taster 


	18. A minimovie

(The Dungeon Dimensions)  
  
# dodges demon-like things #  
  
"Hi, as promised, this chapter will be much longer than usual, there was not enough space in l-space, so I've been forced to write it on-location in the dungeon dimensions."  
  
#weird thing slithers past.#  
  
"So enjoy, and watch out for any hideous monsters that may attack you."  
  
# Enormous creature rears up behind Mr. Towel. #  
  
"Excuse me, just one second."  
  
#Mr. Towel whips out a lightsaber and runs towards it, Boo takes over the narration.#  
  
"Roll the credits."  
  
I do not own yugioh, or Cheech & Chong, or Death or that american.  
  
Imagine a place, parallel to a dimension.  
  
The sort of place you might find a weird mirror or a spooky door.  
  
My friend, you have just entered.....  
  
The stoner's realm.....  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(A cook Juggling with two knives)  
  
(The Winged Dragon Of Ra, and Slyther the sky dragon flying together towards a boat.)  
  
(Kaiba pointing at Obelisk the Tormentor)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(The Shadow Realm)  
  
"The what?"  
  
The harsh voice came again from the creature which Miswim recognised from so many times before.  
  
"The shadow realm, the place where trapped souls wander, without hope, or happiness, ever!"  
  
"What!?"  
  
Miswim scrabbled in the sand looking for a rock or something, anything she could use as a weapon.  
  
The stranger chuckled.  
  
"My dear, I'm not here to hurt you, I just happen to be the only one who is able to help you."  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"Well, that tournament that you were in."  
  
"What about it?"  
  
"I can get you re-entered at round 2."  
  
"Why would you do that? You're a duel monster."  
  
"Recognise me do you?"  
  
Came the harsh voice again, mocking Miswim as she sat, sprawled on the smooth, white sand of the shadow realm.  
  
"Yes, you're Dark Necrofear."  
  
"Quite astute, in fact I am your dark Necrofear, the one from your deck."  
  
"So, you want to help me, because I'm your Mistress?"  
  
"Nicely put, and as a matter of fact yes, but, you'll have to prove your worth to me first. And give me an idea of how much you are willing to stake on this one chance of happiness."  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"Miswim, earth is not as dull and boring as you think it is, Magic, powerfull magic, surrounds it from its very core."  
  
"Oh what, lala lands and fairytales?"  
  
"Where do you think you are now?"  
  
"Maybe a bad dream bought on by the large amounts of marijuana I've inhaled?"  
  
"No, this is a magical realm, parallel to the one in which you live every day."  
  
"And you brought me here I suppose?"  
  
"My, my, you are bright."  
  
The duel monster seemed agitated somewhat.  
  
"Time grows short, I must cut to the chase, there is one way you can get to round two of the tournament, one that has been fated will bring you the truth and happiness you crave from life, but never seem to be able to get."  
  
"So I've been fated to get to round 2, how nice."  
  
"Not so nice, that is one of many possible out comes but to get to round 2 you must risk your life repeatedly."  
  
"On what?"  
  
With this, the duel disk on Miswim's arm, and the doll in the dark necrofear's arm come to life.  
  
"Should of guessed. But what if I don't want to risk my life."  
  
"We will not duel, and then you will wake up in your bed at home wondering for the rest of your life what you might have found."  
  
"So... if I lose then I die."  
  
"No, you'll be stuck here for eternity, with the countless other spirits, a fate much worse than death."  
  
"And if I win? I get through to round 2 of the tournament?"  
  
"Don't be so naïve, you will begin a series of duels, if you lose one of them, you will die. If you want to try this opportunity, summon a deck master, if not, well, I'll say goodbye. Remember, this is a test of courage, not strength."  
  
The secretly nervous Goth shuddered within as she looked at the cards in her deck.  
  
"Where's my dark Necrofear?"  
  
"I'm standing right here, since I'm the one you're duelling against, I'm not on your team."  
  
This shook Miswim even more, no dark necrofear, it had been in her deck since she first started playing.  
  
(The Shibousha Shourei inn) (flashback)  
  
Miswim looked through her deck.  
  
I've got some kick-ass cards, I'm sure to win battle city.  
  
Her dark Necrofear card seemed to wink at her.  
  
Then with no warning, her door slammed open.  
  
"Miswim! Get your ass down...."  
  
Her father paused, mid-sentence.  
  
"What have you got there?"  
  
He seized Miswim's deck before she could hide it.  
  
"You playin' with these stupid cards again!? I'll ban Yoshimitzu for this!"  
  
And with that he threw her cards out of the window.  
  
"Now come downstairs and help out in the bar or I'll beat the shit out of you!"  
  
He stamped off downstairs.  
  
Miswim checked to see he'd gone, then took the single card she'd been able to hang onto out of her pocket, it was slightly crumpled, but it was her favourite.  
  
(The shadow realm)  
  
Miswim's hand paused over her Anubis Noir, her two favourites, battling each other, it didn't seem right, but without it as her deck master, how could she win?  
  
"Tick tock mistress."  
  
She said that with a sneer on her face.  
  
"If you are unable to defeat me, or just don't want to duel, you'll have lost my respect, and that means I'll never fight for you again!"  
  
The air shimmered as Miswim concentrated. Time for a shadow duel.  
  
(Boat 4)  
  
"I'm gonna whoop your ass, Kaiba."  
  
Jinzo appeared behind the first stranger, he seemed to be the deck master of choice for the duellists the had him.  
  
The man wore dark sunglasses and had a bandanna tied over his head, his duel disk was shaped like a cog, and the field areas were little tracks, that presumably expanded upon  
  
"I swear I've seen you somewhere before."  
  
"Yeah, I used to be the intercontinental duelling champion, people call me Bandit Keith. And this is my partner, Arkana, between us we cover magic and technology, there's no way you can win."  
  
"Ha, what ever, you want to use deckmasters?"  
  
"Why not?"  
  
Answered Arkana.  
  
"I'll use my dark magician!"  
  
Kaiba stared in shock when he heard that card name.  
  
"Oh come on, you really didn't think Yugi was the only one with Dark Magician."  
  
Kaiba nodded, dumbfounded.  
  
"Well you're in for a surprise, after Yugi won my other dark magician off me, I went out and got hold of a new one."  
  
Mokuba suddenly flashed with anger at the two creeps.  
  
"I'll use Kazejin for my deck master!!"  
  
Seto looked at his brother and was hit by an inspirational idea.  
  
"And I'll use Suijin."  
  
Bandit Keith sighed.  
  
"Fine, I'll use the auto-shuffler."  
  
A small machine for shuffling decks of cards appeared behind bandit Keith as the cogs on his duel disk whirred, extending the field on either side.  
  
"That looks like a puny machine."  
  
Sneered Kaiba.  
  
"It's as puny as the sum total of yours and your brothers deck, Kaiba."  
  
"So pretty crap then."  
  
"Shut up magic-man and duel, we're here to do a job."  
  
"So normal double-duel rules then?"  
  
"Well no, actually, we thought that the 8000 life points are shared between you...."  
  
"So 4000 each, because those are the normal rules."  
  
"No you Japanese prick, I mean that you share them, and share the damage. When one of you gets hit, you both suffer. And you can not use your monsters to protect each other."  
  
"Ok then, let's duel."  
  
Team Kaiba The Big 2  
  
8000 8000  
  
"Seeing as you challenged us, I'll go first."  
  
Said Kaiba as everybody drew there cards.  
  
"To start with I'll summon Giant Germ in defence mode and place two cards face down."  
  
"Remember, no traps Kaiba!!"  
  
"Shut it."  
  
Arkana set one monster, and placed two cards face down as well, he was copied my Mokuba and Bandit Keith.  
  
Seto drew.  
  
Ahaha, Obelisk already, but my instinct tells me that I need to sacrifice 3 specific monsters. I'll just summon something else right now.  
  
"La Jinn, mystical genie of the lamp, I activate la bombe which destroys all of Keith's monsters and cards on the field and attack with la jinn."  
  
Bandit Keith's field exploded, closely followed by Kaiba's.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Dark Magician lets me pay 1000 life points to copy your magic card, deck master and all that, so we saved 800 life points, and now you're open to attack from me the second you finish your turn."  
  
"Fine, I end my turn by placing one card face down."  
  
"Now I flip my face down card, man eater bug to destroy Mokuba's monster."  
  
The face down card exploded into a thousand shards."  
  
"Then I play a card you may be familiar with, using I sacrifice man eater bug to summon sangan of thunder. I think Kaiba may like a direct attack as he was the one who invented it."  
  
"Not so fast, I Suijin lets me sacrifice a magic/trap card from my field to reduce ur attack to zero, Moki's turn next I think."  
  
"Grr, okay Kaiba, your brother can have his turn."  
  
"Thanks bro, i..."  
  
"Mokuba, summon your deck master!"  
  
"What?"  
  
"Trust me!"  
  
"Ha, your brother's just trying to remove you from the equation to make things easier for himself, because if your deck master dies, you'll be out of the game, and he won't be have to 'look after you,' Mokuba, you are a weakness, because we can get his life points through you, and if you summon your deck master I can destroy it."  
  
Bandit Keith's tirade petered out.  
  
"That's a pretty poor excuse at a mind game bandit keith, I've heard much better from the big 5 and that was nothing, if anything you should try to destroy my deck master while you have the chance because me and my brother are going to kick you into the middle of next week, this duel will be over before you can sing the whole of Las stop this town because after this duel, you won't be stopping in this tournament any more, so I summon Kazejin to the field!"  
  
Mokuba's deck master came to the field.  
  
"Now I attack you directly bandit Keith!"  
  
Kazjin fired a tornado at the American and 2400 dropped away from the big 2's life points.  
  
"Now, Band-aid Keith, come get some!"  
  
The American stared at the pre-teen angrily, how dare he make a mockery of him, Keith drew, but took his card from a little slot under the deck.  
  
"I'll crush you, I activate my deckmasters ability!! Card Picker!!"  
  
"What?"  
  
"I can pay half my life points to pick any one card from any deck in play, and auto shuffler will bring it out, and it shall be my new deck master, and I pick your god card Kaiba, Obelisk the tormentor!!"  
  
A small tractor beam in Keith's duel disk reached out and pulled the god card to the thief.  
  
"Wow, I guess that's lucky for me, and unlucky for you ey?"  
  
Kaiba just glared. Almost hiding the superior smirk that always occupied his face when he knew he would win.  
  
"You forget Keith, You can't summon it to the field, auto shuffler can't sustain it outside of the deck master position unless it's under 4 stars, and obelisk has 10 stars."  
  
"Did I say I was finished? I summon Gradius, and 2 options, then I tribute them to activate Mechanization!"  
  
Obelisk's face crumbled off to reveal a harsh metal version, it shrugged its shoulders and more rock fell off, it took a step forward onto the field and the rest of the rock crashed to the floor cutting the big 2's life points down by another quarter.  
  
Team Kaiba The Big 2  
  
8000 2000  
  
"Now finally, I use monster reborn to bring back Gradius. You see Mechanization allows auto shuffler to control it if the requisite number of monsters are sacrificed to bring the monster to the field, and it surpresseses its special ability of negating magic cards after one turn! Now lock down will stop Kazejin from interfering."  
  
The fighter jet flew out of the grave. And a cage dropped around Mokuba's monster.  
  
"And I sacrifice Gradius to raise Obelisk's attack by another 4000!"  
  
The fighter jet flew up, flipped onto its back and went behind Obelisk, there it went into a dive, or what was a climb to the upside down jet, and looped up to latch into place on the mechanized monster's back.  
  
"Kaiba, you pay for your betrayal, Obelisk attack!!"  
  
Seto calmly laid a card on the field, and obelisk ran full pelt into a wall of Kuribohs.  
  
"Yugi convinced me to put 1 in my deck; I guess it was useful after all."  
  
Gradius exploded.  
  
"Your turn Kaiba."  
  
"I'll finish what Moki started, I summon Suijin to the field."  
  
The ghost-like water elemental passed through Kaiba and onto the field.  
  
"Now we drop 1000 life points to use Game controller and take control of your sangan of thunder. Mokuba? Can I borrow your monster?"  
  
"Of course Seto!"  
  
"I activate Polymerisation! To fuse mine and Mokuba's deckmasters and the monster I took from you Arkana to summon Gate Guardian! Brother to Exodia!"  
  
The 3 monsters fused together to form one big creature.  
  
As one the two Kaibas shouted:  
  
"Gate Guardian! Attack Arkana directly!"  
  
"Not agaiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!"  
  
The giant monster fired a trilogy of elements at the master of magicians.  
  
(boat 5)  
  
A big lump of shit landed on Yugi.  
  
"Mexico burrito's gives your monsters diahoreah man, your monsters attack is taken from your life points and your monster, so mine won."  
  
"No, my most powerful monster!"  
  
"Yes man, now Bleached summoned skull! Attack and wipe him out!"  
  
The effect monster fired electricity at Yugi, but a Kuriboh blocked the attack.  
  
"What was that man? Summoned skull, you can do it!"  
  
The monster launched another attack and it was absorbed by another Kuriboh, soon they were every where.  
  
"Cheech,-san, my Kuriboh's deck master ability is that it can summon a wall of Kuribohs to block an attack by you, and, it summons Kuriboh swarm in defence mode."  
  
"Fine, your turn again midget boy."  
  
Yugi drew beta the magnet warrior, this was just like playing happy families.  
  
"I have a set!"  
  
He yelled  
  
"What man?"  
  
"From my hand I sacrifice alpha, beta and gamma, the magnet warriors to soummon Valkyron, the magnet warrior!"  
  
The monster with 3300 attack appeared on the field.  
  
"Now attack his summoned skull!"  
  
The machine monster charged towards the skeletal monster, but his attack rose by 500, and Valkyron's decreased by 300  
  
"What's going on?"  
  
The magnet warrior smashed summoned skull into a tree, but not before it fired a bolt of electricity into Valkyron's face, they both exploded together.  
  
"I played overload, it's a magic card that makes Bleached Summoned Skull gets an extra 500 attack against machines, and they lose 300, so they destroyed each other."  
  
"Fine, your turn."  
  
"I summon La jinn and attack Kuriboh swarm."  
  
The genie blew up a couple of Kurbohs, but still they multiplied.  
  
"Kuriboh swarm can't be destroyed, I summon Vorse Raider and destroy La jinn."  
  
Yugi Cheech  
  
2000 2900  
  
"I summon one monster in defence, and end my turn."  
  
"Haha, I summon dark elf, and switch Kuriboh swarm into attack and destroy your face down monster with Vorse raider, then Kuriboh swarm takes 900 directly off your life points, and I pay 1000 life points to take the rest off."  
  
On Yugi's visor, the words were displayed:  
  
Yugi Cheech  
  
1000 0000  
  
Yugi wins prize of 1500 points for extra style in taking the exact amount off Cheech's life points. Yugi, take your prize.  
  
"I'll have your Mexican Buritto thanks, I guess I'll see you in round 2?"  
  
"Sure what ever man."  
  
The two Mexicans walked off, Yugi had gained 2500 points for the tournament and was feeling pretty chuffed with himself.  
  
"Ok Joey, I want to win Yami back off you."  
  
"Err okay, follow me."  
  
(Bakura's room)  
  
A mysterious figure in a silvery turban now stood where Bakura had been before, in his eye was the millennium eye.  
  
"Ah, so you finally come for me ey? I've held you off for 3000 years."  
  
AND YOU COULD FOR ANOTHER 3000.  
  
"What?"  
  
The turban flowed slightly, and someone watching would have seen that it was in fact Ryou Bakura's hair was twisted around his head to simulate the turban.  
  
I AM GIVING YOU A CHANCE OF HAVING A LIFETIME, IF YOU CAN DEFEAT ME IN ONE DUEL MONSTERS DUEL I SHALL FLIP YOUR LIFETIMER AND YOU SHALL LIVE FOR A FURTHER 3000 YEARS.  
  
"I accept."  
  
(Bakura's room)(One short duel later.)  
  
"So I'm going to die?"  
  
NOW  
  
The grim reaper swung his scythe and impaled the millennium eye, cutting the blue aura that held Simon's form to Bakura's body.  
  
Ryou fell over and the millennium eye rolled onto the floor, bereft of its spirit.  
  
Death climbed on his horse that had just arrived and had been there for ages, he slipped the soul into one of the saddlebags,  
  
COME BINKY  
  
He rode through the wall.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -----------------------------  
  
(Back with Edd in the dungeon dimensions)  
  
The cliffy monster has been vanquished, and normal chapters shall be resumed shortly, thank you for reading my made for chapter movie.  
  
If anybody in the tournament tells me where I've stolen the new American from, then they automatically gets to the next round.  
  
(Mr. Towel disappears in a cloud of funny smelling smoke, leaving just the reader, north is the review button, behind you is the story, pick one exit.) 


	19. Where oh where may that puzzle be?

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard)  
  
Welcome back to L-space, unfortunately neither Bakura will be in this chapter as they were injured by the creatures from the dungeon dimensions, so the mystery about their duel with Death will remain a mystery till next chappie. Back to the old credits now, they will change again when we reach the second round, or a really important chapter comes up.  
  
I do not own yugioh, nor the concept of millennium item cards. Or Garth Merengi's darkplace, or Cheech or chong.  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You are about to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(The Shadow realm)  
  
Miswim grew wings and took on a ghostly form.  
  
She gasped in amazement.  
  
"Here, you are your deck master!"  
  
Explained the dark necrofear.  
  
Miswim exhulted in the new experience, she let her ghostly body begin to dissipate, then pulled it together, she jumped, flapped her wings, and rose into the air.  
  
She laughed in joy for what felt like the first time in her life as she soared through the air.  
  
"Don't get to attached or you may not want to come back. The flying isn't as fun after 2 millenia."  
  
Miswim swooped in and landed in front of the dark necrofear.  
  
"You know from personal experience?"  
  
"Every creature in this realm once used to be mortal, then they lost a duel, and became their Ka spirits, the monster they trusted the most, or just the monster who happened to be their deck master at the time."  
  
"I've heard about duel monsters coming from Egypt, but I thought Deck masters had only just been invented."  
  
The duel monster just laughed with scorn.  
  
"No, Seto Kaiba was trapped in a virtual reality game with his step-brother who had been to a revealing of an ancient tablet depicting the deck master rules, it was the 3rd to last duel system before the world was almost destroyed, but I speak too much."  
  
"Did you use to be a human?"  
  
Miswim had obviously struck a nerve.  
  
The creature's voice lost all emotion and reverted back to the harsh whisper.  
  
"Duel! Now!"  
  
Miswim summoned her first monster, face down, she followed it up with two trap cards.  
  
I gotta find some more about her  
  
"I activate the magical desstiney board."  
  
Whispered the dark necrofear.  
  
"I discard magical bob to activate magic jammer, whenever magical bob is discarded from the hand to the grave, he appears on the field."  
  
"Fine, I lay down 2 cards and summon vengeful bob, attack!"  
  
The monster destroyed his likely named twin, inflicting a hundred to Miswim's life points.  
  
Around her the fog grew slightly thicker.  
  
"Now Vengeful bob has 700 more attack points because a monster called Bob has been sent to the grave."  
  
Muttered Miswim, recognising the card from her collection of 5 'Bob' spirit cards.  
  
"But luckily for me when a monster with the word Bob in its name dies, mourning Bob can be summoned from my hand."  
  
"No, lucky for the both of us."  
  
The two Bob monsters both appeared on the field.  
  
Miswim finally worked it out.  
  
"You have my deck!"  
  
"Took you a while, yes, apart from your Anubis Noir card, I have every single card in your deck, this is the ultimate test of your skills."  
  
"How did you get trapped here?"  
  
The dark Necrofear sighed.  
  
"In Egypt 3000 years ago I was a, well I guess you would have called me a prostitute, only I didn't get paid."  
  
"What, so you ... were a slave girl?"  
  
"Yes, I was in the pharoh's harem, and because he enjoyed duel monsters so much as a game, all us girls learnt to play it..."  
  
(Boat 1)  
  
"I bet you were pretty good."  
  
Yugi walked with Joey down the corridor, as the blonde tried to explain what had happened that morning.  
  
"Yes, I was doing pretty well, until..."  
  
"Until what?"  
  
Said Yugi, becoming slightly suspicious;  
  
"Until he summoned Exodia Neccross."  
  
"Kaiba told me about that monster, what happened?"  
  
"Well, I had him down to a hundred life points.... Then he summoned Exodia Necross, megamorphed it, and got my life points directly."  
  
"Joey, please tell me.... He didn't..."  
  
"He won Yugi, and Yami insisted that he go with him, something seemed to be up."  
  
Yugi sunk to the floor his head in his hands.  
  
"Do you still have your deck?"  
  
"I gave him the one I'd won from Marik."  
  
"Ok, here's what I'm going to do, give me your deck and trunk, and we'll prepare a deck specifically to take him out, I need to find Kaiba, he'll be able to help me."  
  
(Boat 4)  
  
"Hand over your decks, we get your points to, and you two are out of the tournament."  
  
Kaiba growled at the two.  
  
"I knew we'd lose, how did I let you talk me into this Keeith? Now I've lost my deck!"  
  
Arkana smacked Bandit Keith across the back of the head.  
  
"Don't worry, our bosses will give us our decks back, they didn't expect us to win, we just have to deliver a message, and don't touch me ever again!"  
  
Bandit Keith knocked Arkana to the floor and handed the 2 decks to Seto.  
  
"What's the message your delivering punk?"  
  
"My bosses told me to tell you to be prepared, they are coming."  
  
"What?"  
  
"They are coming."  
  
With this Keith faded from view till all that was left was his hand.  
  
Kaiba stared at it in bewilderment as it rose, lowered, then went from one side to the next.  
  
As it swung to slap him, Kaiba snatched it out of the air and delivered a kick to where Keith's head should have been, but the invisible American had lowered it and head butted Kaiba in the chest, before his last hand disappeared, and footsteps appeared in the silvery sand that was still being projected by the duel disks.   
  
(Back in L-space)  
  
(Swivels round in chair)  
  
Well wasn't that nice, I wonder what conclusions my 2 readers are going to jump to from that  
  
U no the drill  
  
(Disappears in a puff of smoke that smells of; hey, you know, rings, they're round right, and hard on the outside, and soft in the middle, they're like, hard and soft at the same time.)  
  
In front of you is one exit, the review button. 


	20. A 20th chapter bonanza

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard)  
  
I do not own yugioh, nor the concept of millennium item cards. Or Garth Merengi's darkplace, or Cheech or chong, and neither do Almighty Bob or Douglas Adams.  
  
Oh and {} now signifies thought as ff.net kept cutting out the hash's.  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You are about to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(The Shadow realm)  
  
"Your move Miswim."  
  
"I use monster reborn to bring magical Bob back from the field, and with two 'bob' monsters on the field, friendly Bob is special summoned, and when 3 Bob monsters are on the field, I can fuse them together to summon The Almighty Bob (3000,4000)."  
  
The God from hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy came to life;  
  
"Now whenever the almighty Bob is summoned to the field, he gains 500 attack and defence points from any bob card currently in play, bringing him up to a total of 4000 attack and 5000 defence."  
  
"Good move mistress, incidentally, do you know why Pegasus created these 'Bob' cards?"  
  
"You haven't heard of the Egyptian Bob monsters?"  
  
"No, you mean Egyptian gods, for he created these while high as a tribute to Douglas Adams, as Pegasus is a great fan. And for almighty Bob to attack you have to sacrifice a monster from your hand each turn using the magic card Perfectly normal sandwich or else he can't attack, and since you don't have that card, almighty Bob is pretty useless."  
  
"Not if I put him in defence mode."  
  
Almighty Bob glowed blue for a second and resembled a monster Miswim had seen only once before.  
  
"Now you can't attack my life points directly. Now, I haven't summoned a monster this turn, so I summon Zombyra the dark and destroy your vengeful Bob and 200 lp. Your turn"  
  
Now the spirit was losing, but still by a very small margin.  
  
The monster drew and recited more from her life story;  
  
"I became very talented at duelling, and soon became one of the pharaoh's favourites, until one night when he was away on a 'diplomatic' mission to what is now known as England, his high priest Set confronted me."  
  
(Flash back)  
  
"Well, slave, while the pharaoh's gone, I'm in charge, and I need to try out my new tactics for when he gets back, I will play you, and if you lose I will bed you."  
  
"Yes Master."  
  
Said the dejected slave.  
  
So, they duelled, and a little under ten minutes later;  
  
"You lose slave girl, and so pitifully as well, you do not deserve your place in the pharaoh's harem, away with you, To THE SHADOW REALM!!!"  
  
With this set trapped the unfortunate girl in the body of a spirit monster, and sealed her in the shadow realm, from which she managed to use her body's skills to link with the minds of the people who owned her tablet, and later, her card.  
  
(The Shadow realm)  
  
During this story, the dark necrofear laid a monster in defence mode, and played two cards face down.  
  
"I never saw Egypt or the Pharaoh again. Your move."  
  
"Oh, I see what you're doing; you're distracting me from the duel!"  
  
Yelled Miswim suddenly  
  
"This is all a bunch of lies isn't it!? You're definitely not my dark necrofear; I worked it out when you switched to the 3rd person for your story!"  
  
"Maybe, or maybe not, but you must still play the duel."  
  
"Very well, I summon my vengeful Bob, raising almighty Bob's defence by another 500, then Zombyra the dark! Actually wait a second."  
  
Her mournful Bob has 1100 attack and 2000 defence, and yet she didn't switch it into defence against Zombyra the dark, who has 800 more attack than Bob still, those 4 face down cards must be part of some plan. I have nothing that can destroy those cards so I'll have to trust in my trap card and my monster.  
  
"Zombyra, attack!!"  
  
The cloaked figure swung his sword at the weeping bob monster, and as he slashed down, Dark Necrofear activated mirror force, but Miswim was ready and activated 7 tools of the bandit, the mystical energy that reflected Zombyra's attack fell apart just as Zombyra reached it, taking 1000 off Miswim's lp, but Zomyra proceeded to destroy mournful Bob, and remove 800 from the dark necrofear's life points.  
  
"Impressive."  
  
Came the harsh whisper again;  
  
"You were ready for that, huh?"  
  
"Yep, and now my vengeful Bob has 700 more attack, and can get your face down monster."  
  
"Negate attack should take care of that, anything else?"  
  
"No, I'll just put one card face down and end my turn."  
  
"Ok, I'll flip my face down card, Kuriboh, and activate my face down multiply to turn it into 5, now if I activate ultimate offerings from my field, I can sacrifice 2 of them for a summoned skull, and a dark necrofear, now attack and destroy my mistress's Zombyra the dark, dark necrofear, and summoned skull, take out that vengeful Bob!"  
  
The Kuriboh multiplied, and these were run-of-the mill Kuribohs, unlike Yugi's and took up 5 different monster spaces, two vaporised in a cloud of fuzzy light and were replaced by a summoned skull, and a dark necrofear. These two then went charging off at their respective opponents, while the 500lp penalty was exacted on the dark necrofear that was duelling.  
  
"I activate the trap card Bobbify, and equip it to Zombyra the dark, now your dark Necrofear has killed Bob the dark, Vengeful Bob gets a revenge boost big enough to ver power your summoned skull!"  
  
The sword wielding monster cried out;  
  
"My name is Bob!"  
  
As dark necrofear twisted of its head.  
  
On the other side of the field, vengeful Bob cried out in despair and alarm, his attack rose by 700, and he sliced summoned skulls head clean off.  
  
Miswim Dark Necrofear  
  
6400 6300  
  
"You can tell this duel will last for a while Mistress, why don't you resign now, and keep your body? Before you lose and I take it from you."  
  
"Take my body?"  
  
"Errr yes, didn't I tell you, when your mind gets trapped here, I get your body."  
  
"Ok..."  
  
Miswim was beginning to get freaked out, yeah sure she had played well up till now, but her enemy was only losing by 100 life points, and she had sunk some of her best tactics into the match, without almighty Bob being able to attack, she had only one chance to win.  
  
"I summon 2 spirit Harpies, using your magic card against you!"  
  
Miswim Dark Necrofear  
  
5900 6300  
  
"Well if you wish to lose faster, I didn't realise you wanted to give me your body."  
  
Came the harsh whisper, Miswim kicked herself, how could she have believed those lies at the start.  
  
{Oh god, did I just make a terrible mistake? Hopefully not, I better just follow this through and hope for the best, god I wish I had my dark necrofear.}  
  
With these thoughts, dark necrofear turned to look at Miswim.  
  
{Oh God, she can hear what I think, must... be... strong.....}  
  
"With my deck master as who she is, each of my Harpies are at 2600 attack, now is the time to flip my swarm of shadow demons."  
  
Miswim's monster that she had had face down throughout the duel flipped itself over, thousands of little black demons poured out of it, and they marched towards the dark necrofear on the field, swallowing it absolutely. The dark necrofear looked like a massive heaving black blob as it tried to fight off the millions of demons surrounding it, with one last agonizing cry, the support for the demons disappeared, and the demons burnt to ashes.  
  
"Swarm of shadow demons remove your opponent's most powerful monster from play, so unluckily for you, Dark Necrofears effect will not work, now my harpies, and remaining Bob, destroy the last of her Kuribohs!"  
  
The 3 mobile warriors on Miswim's side of the field each dispatched a fuzzy little Kuriboh until her opponent had none left.  
  
"Your move."  
  
Miswim began to feel happier after that move until the fiend rained on her parade.  
  
"You do realise that in all of that my life points were not damaged, and you went from winning to losing!"  
  
"You have no monsters left on your field, and no powerful ones in your deck.... Don't you?"  
  
"Oh I'm sorry, when I said I had your deck, I meant I had the one you possessed before your duel that knocked you out of the tournament."  
  
"You don't mean...."  
  
"I activate graceful charity, and discard two monsters, I then summon dark elf. Now I activate Monster reborn to summon the winged dragon of Ra!!!"  
  
"What?"  
  
Miswim was almost crying in terror now, in the shadow realm, these monsters had strength, and if she lost, not only would she lose her body, but this god card might damage her mind.  
  
"Now, I sacrifice dark elf to transfer its attack to the god card, and transfer all but 1 of my life points to Ra to make it stronger than ever!!!!"  
  
The Egyptian god cards attack power rose from 0000 to 8299.  
  
"Now attack one of her spirit harpies!"  
  
Miswim's vengeful Bob, and both her spirit harpies had 2600 attack each, and her almighty Bob, in defence mode had 4500. Miswim stood no chance, she had one card left in her hand as the winged dragon swooped down on top of her, and she felt a wetness in between her legs, {it can't end like this, no, it can't}, she thought she could imagine herself defending herself with her duel disk, but then it all went black.  
  
(Flash back)  
  
"Here, are these yours? Someone dropped them out of the window."  
  
Said the cloaked man;  
  
"You better keep hold of those cards, you'll need them in the future................................................................................................................................................................................................................ .................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... .................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... .................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... ................................................................................................................................................................................................................................."  
  
(Flash back)  
  
"Where the hell did these 3 cards come from? From? From? From? From? From? From? From? From? From? From? From? From? ............................................................................ ............................................................................ ............................................................................ ............................................................................ ............................................................................ ............................................................................ ............................................................................ ............................................................................ ............................................................................ ............................................................................ ............................................................................ ............................................................................ ............................................................................ ............................................................................ ............................................................................ ............................................................................ ............................................................................ .............................. ............................................................................ ..........................."  
  
"Mister?"  
  
"Mister?"  
  
"Mister?"  
  
"Mister?"  
  
"Mister?"  
  
"Mister?"  
  
"Mister?"  
  
"Mister?"  
  
"Mister?"  
  
(Shadow realm)  
  
{The 3rd card!!!}   
  
(Boat 17)  
  
There was nothing on this floor of the cabin, it was all one enormous computer which controlled the steering of all 30 boats, it kept the hlo emitters on the fleet working, it processed all the information it could, and unknown to the duellists, it contained a virtual world, all bright and ready for round 3.  
  
And it was already running.  
  
(Yugi's room)  
  
It was like a bad dream, what would you do if your best friend had lost half of your soul, he had looked every where for Mathew Perriwinkle and not a single person had seen him since when he fought Joey. Kaiba and Mokuba were keeping away from him and he hadn't seen Bakura, tea or Tristan since they got on the boat. The midget sighed, and went to sleep  
  
Somewhere in the fleet, Yugi tossed in his dreams.  
  
(L-space)  
  
Well wasn't that fun, see you next time.  
  
(Disappears with a puff of weird smelling smoke, leaving behind the review button as your only escape) 


	21. A revelation

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard)  
  
I do not own yugioh, nor the concept of millennium item cards. Or Garth Merengi's darkplace, or Cheech or chong, and neither do Almighty Bob or Douglas Adams.  
  
Oh and {} now signifies thought as ff.net kept cutting out the hash's.  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You are about to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(The Shadow realm)  
  
Dark Necrofear strode towards the spot were Msiwim had been;  
  
"Easy victory, now where's her deck? She should have dropped it here."  
  
White streaks of nothingness flew together from all over the shadow realm. Reforming Miswim's monsters, her duel disk, and finally Miswim.  
  
Almighty Bob seemed to have vanished though.  
  
Miswim flapped her wings and slowly got to her feet;  
  
She had very little strength left, and she was still shaking.  
  
"I realised... my deckmasters ability..... I didn't know it.... But I used it any way, and it redirected Ra's attack on almighty Bob,.... The one I chose..... Now I play Yami,... Then using the magic card Gateway to Anubis, I discard my hand to replace it with Anubis Noir, then, I sacrifice my 3 monsters to summon him, and I direct attack, with my favourite monster!!! Go Anubis Noir!!!"  
  
The enormous jackal bounced towards the dark Necrofear and ripped her head off, destroying the one remaining life point she possessed, as she collapsed into trails of dark nothingness that broke apart. Miswim heard a voice on the wind.  
  
"I'll be back little girl, and I'll get you!!!"  
  
And Then She Woke Up.  
  
(Boat 27, Virtual Reality suite)  
  
Miswim woke up and looked around, she was in a small egg-shaped booth, and her duel disk was on her arm, she leafed through her cards, relieved to find dark Necrofear back.  
  
Miswim pushed up the glass dome that was over the top of her and stood up;  
  
It was an empty room, empty apart from rows of computer terminals and the single VR booth.  
  
Miswim climbed out of the booth, and looked around tentatively.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
Her voice quavered.  
  
clap  
  
clap  
  
clap  
  
A man walked through the entrance way;  
  
"Well done, you made it past the first stage, several friends of our sponsor have asked that you take part in this extra game, a lot of us were betting that he would defeat you, but you won, so on to the next duel were you shall risk life and limb, against an opponent known as the dagger of death, come, we must leave to boat 30."  
  
(Boat 1)  
  
Yugi came up onto the deck of the boat looking for a duel, he needed to qualify for the next round, Yami would surely be there, and then he'd have a much easier chance of finding him with less people around.  
  
"So Mai, you ain't scared of the shadows no more?"  
  
Yugi heard Joey's voice, he darted inside the cabins again, he didn't want to talk to him, not till he got Yami back.  
  
(Boat 1)(Deck)  
  
"Of course not numbskull, Miswim did the best thing she could of by defeating me, it made me realise that these shadow games aren't real, with what happened last time I went into the shadows, to be honest I wasn't sure whether these had hidden dangers. Lets go find a double duel hun, we both need some extra points."  
  
"Stop right there hiohohohohohohoho."  
  
"Oh for fucks sake, I thought he wasn't in this tournament."  
  
Weevil stepped out from behind a fat person.  
  
"You two want a double duel ey? Well I've accumulated 8000 tournament points, and my friend has 9000."  
  
Rex also stepped out from behind the fat person who disappeared moments after.  
  
"So we'll do a double duel with me risking 1000 to Joey and Rex risking 2000 to Mai, while Mai's thousand will be Rex's when we win, and Joey's two thousand shall henceforth belong to Me."  
  
"Weevil, I beaten both of ya before, and Mai's whipped Rex, between the two of us, you stand no chance."  
  
"Okay, if you're so confident, me and rex will each bet another 200 points, if you to risk your decks as well."  
  
"Yeah!"  
  
"Ok Hun, you ready for this?"  
  
"Sure am, Mai."  
  
/  
  
"Let's do /  
  
this" / "let's  
  
/ do this!"  
  
/  
  
"We'll play the rules were life points are shared, that way if one person has no defence, both suffer."  
  
"We'll play by your rules if we can have deck masters."  
  
"Hyohohohohoho, I stole the rules off the internet and were thoroughly prepared, I'll have my insect Hive!"  
  
"Deckmasters ey? I'll have fossilized amber!"  
  
"Ladies first."  
  
"Why thank you Joey, Queen Harpy!!"  
  
"Jinzo!!"  
  
"Where did you get a card that powerful Wheeler?"  
  
"He beat Espa Roba."  
  
"The psychic duellist?"  
  
"The very same."  
  
"I could ask how you got your card Weevil."  
  
"Well, don't broadcast it around, but a friend of mine works in one of the duel disk booths and I've got one of the evolution cards that we're not supposed to be given until round 2, yours is some sort of dog, wheeler, now are we duelling or are we talking?  
  
"Fine, I'll go first and summon Cyber Harpy in offensive mode, Weevil?"  
  
"One monster face down, and 2 other cards. Doggy?"  
  
"I'll get you Weevil, I place 2 cards face down and summon the flaming swordsman in attack, and then I power him up with Salamandra, beat that. Rex?"  
  
2400  
  
"Fine, I'll summon try-horned wilderbeast:"  
  
1800  
  
"I activate 2 elegant egotists and summon 2 harpy sisters from my deck,"  
  
2100 1800 2100 2400  
  
(????) 2100  
  
"Now Harpy sisters attack first Weevil's monster, then his life points!"  
  
One of the pairs of Harpy sisters swooped on the face down card, and flew up into the air, tearing it apart, while the other pair flew at weevil underneath, but the harpy sisters dropped the card and just before the other pair hit Weevil, a man eater bug jumped out of it and tore off their heads.  
  
"Hyohohohohoho, my face down monster was a man eater bug, and it destroyed your harpy sisters before they could reach my life points."  
  
"I still have cyber harpy, attack Weevil, now!!"  
  
The cyber harpy flew towards weevil, but man eater bug jumped out of the hive behind him and devoured it before falling to the floor and exploding.  
  
"My hive can duplicate any effect used by an insect monster throughout the duel, hyohoho."  
  
"Damn, that's one good effect."  
  
"You said it Joe, but I don't think he can use that man-eater bug's effect again."  
  
"You are right for once Miss Valentine. Now, if you are done, I shall summon one monster face down and end my turn."  
  
"If that's not another man-eater bug, I'll eat Mai's new shoes; I summon Goblin attack force and use offerings to the doomed to destroy it."  
  
"You better not be wrong there sweet cakes, these shoes cost 100 dollars."  
  
The face down card was destroyed by the magic.  
  
"Was I right Weevil?"  
  
"I'll tell you when you end your turn."  
  
"Fine, I'll..."  
  
"Wait Joey, Rex's monster has got more powerful."  
  
"That's right, I was waiting for you fools to notice, it can't attack in the turn it's summoned, but in every of my opponent's standby phases, it gains 300 more attack points!"  
  
2400  
  
"Joey, take it out now while you still can!"  
  
"Alright, flame swordsman; attack Rex's try-horned wilderbeast!"  
  
The warrior nodded its head then swung its flaming blade at the monster's head, just as the blade severed the top of the neck, the beast stuck its 3 horns into the swordsman's chest, the mystical fire blade cut through the rest of the big creature's neck, but the flame swordsman started wheezing, then exploded into a million fragments.  
  
"Now goblin attack force, attack Rex directly!"  
  
"Not so fast, I quick play my offerings to the doomed to destroy your goblin attack force."  
  
"Thanks Weevil."  
  
"You should have changed the field in your first move, then that swordsman wouldn't have taken out your wilderbeast."  
  
Joey laughed at the bickering between the two team mates  
  
"My turn now, I play monster reborn to b...."  
  
Out of Weevil's graveyard came a snake, it wiggled onto the field, then pulled a card over its head.  
  
"What the fuck?"  
  
"Hyohohoho, if its in the graveyard during somebody's standby phase, water snake returns to the field in face down defence. Oh yes, I almost forgot, insect hive, bring back man eater bug."  
  
A man eater bug crawled out of the hive and pulled a card over its head to protect itself.  
  
"See, I don't need to draw next turn, I have a fool proof strategy, you can not summon enough monsters per turn to defeat me!!!"  
  
Rex Raptor looked impatient;  
  
"As I was saying, I use monster reborn to bring back my wilderbeast, it'll have to start all over again, and I'll summon a monster face down and end my turn, Mai?"  
  
8000  
Joey Mai  
()()  
2100  
  
(????)(????) (????)2100  
() Weevil Underwood Rex Raptor  
8000  
  
"I'll equip my remaining harpy sisters with a cyber shield and a rose whip and attack your wilderbeast Rex!"  
  
The sisters flew at the wilder beast, one flicked its whip and wrapped it around the creature's legs, and the other caught it in the face, the tri- horned beast disappeared in a cloud of shards.  
  
8000  
Joey Mai  
()() (CS)(RW)  
2900  
  
(????)(????) (????)2100  
() Weevil Underwood Rex Raptor  
7200  
  
"Way to go Rex, it's my turn left, and I'm not taking any chances, I flip my man eater bug to destroy your harpy sisters Mai, and then I sacrifice both it and my face down water snake to summon my insect queen! I had to fight a lot of duels to get this card back Wheeler, you know what I had to do?"  
  
The enormous insect appeared with an attack of 2200  
  
"Weevil, now don't you go taking your problems out on me, you challenged me to that duel, and I won it, even though you didn't play by the rules."  
  
"I don't care what you have to say, my hive can now man-eater bug's effect again, and I'll use water snake's effect to get it back again, face it, my combo is unbeatable Wheeler. So, I guess I'll attack you directly, Insect Queen! Get Joey!!"  
  
The enormous monster attacked Joey and tried to rip his arm off, but Joey activated a trap card and his and Mai's life points rose to 9800.  
  
"Wuh? What just happened Wheeler? You better not be cheating!!"  
  
"What and be like you Weevil? Not likely, Nutrient Z rose our life points by 4000 before your attack hit home."  
  
"It's only a matter of time Joey!"  
  
"Shut up Rex!"  
  
Joey drew his card and Weevil's two monsters slithered back onto the field  
  
9800  
Joey Mai  
()  
  
(????)(????)(2200) (????)2100  
() Weevil Underwood Rex Raptor  
7200  
  
"Ok, hows this combo?"  
  
Joey pulled 3 cards out of his hand.  
  
"First I summon 7 coloured fish and attach malevolent nuzzler to raise its attack higher than your insect Queen's!"  
  
"Fool, Insect hive! Man-eating-bug!!"  
  
The insect flew out of one of the windows in the hive and devoured the fish, Joey's card went back onto the top of his deck.  
  
"Not quite that stupid Weevil, I play pot of greed and get malevolent nuzzler and another card, now I can play an unbeatable combination of cards."  
  
"What? You've already summoned this turn!!"  
  
Weevil freaked out as Joey carried on, not missing a step.  
  
"First I play giant trunade, removing all our magic & trap cards to our hands, then Raigeki shall remove all of your monsters, and finally I use polymerisation to fuse summoned skull and my red eyes black dragon to form the black skull dragon, then I play sleight of hand which allows me to draw magic card from my graveyard, and any fused monster to attack straight away, then finally I play pot of greed againand summon my deck master to the field."  
  
3400  
  
"You done Wheeler?"  
  
"Nope, I use metal morph to turn my big monstermonster into a machine and use limiter removal to double its attack power!! "  
  
6800 4800  
  
"What!?" "What!?" "What!?"  
  
"Now attack Weevil directly!!"  
  
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
The metal dragon fired an enormous fireball at Weevil, almost wiping out the two's life points.  
  
9800  
Joey Mai  
  
(6800) (4800)  
  
Weevil Underwood Rex Raptor  
0400  
  
"Look dude, if you want to miss out on the pot, you can resign now."  
  
"Take your worst shot, you realise if I have a card in my hand that can stop your attack, then you lose Joey, limiter removal will destroy Jinzo."  
  
"You're bluffing."  
  
"No I'm not, jeez Wheeler, don't you even know what your card does?"  
  
"I know alright!"  
  
"Joey!"  
  
Mai suddenly sounded out from her point on the field.  
  
"Mai?"  
  
"Listen Joey, limiter removal does destroy your monsters that it affects, you should know that. Look Joey no matter what you do Jinzo will die at the end of this turn, defeat Weevil now and we'll win!!"  
  
"But what if he has a Kuriboh or something?"  
  
"Then it'll be up to me to win, listen Joey you will definitely lose if you don't attack, you have nothing to lose, you can end this right now, come on Joey!"  
  
"Jinzo!! Attack Weevil directly!"  
  
The robotic telepath reached its hands up to its head.  
  
A glow began to grow, white searing light, bright enough to hurt the eyeballs built up in between its hands.  
  
Jinzo made a thrusting motion towards Weevil and threw the golden ball at him an explosion engulfed Weevil, and Joey thought he could see something in front of him, but the explosion hit, and Weevil was surrounded by smoke.  
  
(L-space)  
  
Well wasn't that fun, see you next time.  
  
(Disappears with a puff of weird smelling smoke, leaving behind the review button as your only escape) 


	22. An operatic twist

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard)  
  
I do not own yugioh, nor the concept of millennium item cards. Or Garth Merengi's darkplace, or Cheech or chong, and neither do Almighty Bob or Douglas Adams.  
  
Oh and {} now signifies thought as ff.net kept cutting out the hash's.  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You are about to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
** YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM**  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Boat 27)  
  
"Stay close behind me, and speak to no-one, if you must, tell them that you are being shipped off the boats, we must be quick, Tanto does not like being kept waiting."

* * *

(Boat 1)(Deck)  
  
The smoke cleared, and neither Weevil nor Rex had any life points left.  
  
"We win!!"  
  
Shouted Mai and Joey together.  
  
"Weevil and Rex hand over your decks."  
  
"Joey, before you take my Insect Hive card, remember this, I'm not supposed to have it yet, meaning that some official will take it off you if they see you using it, and I'll get it back at the start of round 2, and you'll get kicked out of the tournament."  
  
"I could just not use it until the tournament is over, so hows about I take it, then trade ya for 3 others from your deck with it?"  
  
Weevil grumbled.  
  
"I suppose that would be acceptable."  
  
"I'm taking Rex's fossilized amber, I've read its effect and it will actually work well with my deck."  
  
Said Mai, handing the Dino duellist's deck back to him.  
  
Joey took 3 cards from Weevil's deck that he thought would help him, and then he turned to the insect duellist, still holding his deck in his hand.  
  
"Weevil, I seem to remember another boat ride."  
  
Weevil gasped, surely....  
  
"You destroyed my friend Yugi's most powerful combo in his deck, you destroyed 2 of his Exodia pieces, without which he almost lost to some impostor with Seto Kaiba's deck, he had to rely on Kaiba, cheating for him."  
  
"You wouldn't..."  
  
"No Weevil, I'm not like you."  
  
Joey through Weevil's deck at the floor in front of him, where it scattered, causing Weevil to kneel down to pick them up.  
  
Just as Weevil slipped the last card into his deck, and put it safely back into his duel disk;  
  
Joey stepped on his head, pinning it to the floor.  
  
"But if you ever pull that trick again Weevil, I will, and until I say your debt is cleared, you will drop everything when I ask you to do something, and you will do it, do you understand?"  
  
Weevil tried to buck Joey off, but he forced his foot down harder on the stoned green haired boy.  
  
"Yes... I understand."  
  
Joey lifted his foot and let the creep up.  
  
"Come on Mai, we gotta catch a couple more duels."  
  
The two headed off to boat 2.  
  
"Raptor? Come in raptor."  
  
Rex's earpiece suddenly crackled to life.  
  
"Raptor here, everything proceeded as expected, Joey Wheeler and Mai Valentine each have 5000 points, and the means to get into round 2."  
  
"Well done, your missing cards shall be replaced, tell Underwood he is to return his Insect Hive card now, he will get it back when Round 2 is declared open, and Rex?"  
  
"Yes sir?"  
  
"Good luck."

* * *

(Boat 2)(Deck)  
  
Yugi had gone all over boat 1 and found a covered gangway near his cabin to boat 2, and was just leaving the cabin area to find a duel when he heard a familiar voice.  
  
"Yugi, there you are!"  
  
He turned to see Tea hurrying out from behind a trading stall.  
  
"Hi Yugi, how are you doing, Sora has 5500 points, and she's been helping me find some good cards, I'm building up my deck so I can enter the next tournament. How many points do you have Yugi?"  
  
"Err... 4500"  
  
"Cool, hey, where's your millennium puzzle?"  
  
"I lent it to Joey so that Yami could improve his duelling, but Joey handed Yami over when he lost the duel, and the guy he lost it to an Exodia duellist, who hasn't been seen since."  
  
Sora came out from behind the stall;  
  
"Hey Tea, me deck's unstoppable now, I just got..."  
  
Sora looked at Yugi.  
  
"Who you mate?  
  
"He's Yugi, the master duellist I told you about."  
  
"What? That Squirt?"  
  
"He's ranked the all-time best duellist."  
  
Yugi blushed.  
  
"Hi, I'm Sora Jade, Tea's Australian pen-friend."  
  
"Hi."  
  
"Do you wanna duel? Tea's told me your unbeatable, I wanna try."  
  
"Well if you...."  
  
"Yugi's not feeling that great."  
  
Tea took Yugi into the hatchway slightly;  
  
"Yugi, are you sure you want to duel, without Yami?"  
  
"I just beat 2 Mexican guys, I'm fine, and the highest chance of getting Yami back is to get as far as possible, because whoever has him will get to the finals, no doubt."  
  
"If you're sure."  
  
Yugi walked out of the stairwell;  
  
"Sora, I accept."  
  
"Only a friendly game mate, just 500 points, I do'want ta lose all me points to ya."  
  
"It's a deal, do you play with deckmasters?"  
  
"Sure, bring it on, I'll use Robotic knight."  
  
"Dark Magician!"  
  
Yugi slipped his dark magician into a tray which slid out from under his deck, and Sora's deck slid up in the phantom of the opera mask to reveal a tray which she slipped her card into. Then they each pressed a button on their respective disks, closing Yugi's draw, and sliding Sora's deck into place.  
  
Then each deck activated, Yugi's just slammed into place, following the usual duel disk system, but a cloak billowed from out behind the mask on Sora's arm to form her field.  
  
Let's Duel /  
  
/  
  
/Let's Duel

* * *

(L-space)  
  
(Mr. Towel disappears in a cloud of funny smelling smoke, leaving just the reader, north is the review button, behind you is the story, pick one exit.)


	23. The knight of the happily fed

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard)  
  
I do not own yugioh, nor the concept of millennium item cards. Or Garth Merengi's darkplace, or Cheech or chong, and neither do Almighty Bob or Douglas Adams.  
  
Oh and {} now signifies thought as kept cutting out the hash's.  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You are about to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Boat 28)  
  
"Come on Joey, you made a bet, and by the tournament rules, YOU have to stick to it!"  
  
"But they taste awful...."  
  
Miswim crept passed Joey and Mai, with two officials following her at a discreet distance; Wait till she showed up in round 2! She'd scare the life out of them.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Boat 2)  
  
"Ladies first."  
  
"Aren't you a gentleman Mr. Moto, alright, I summon 1 monster face down, and place 2 cards face down."  
  
The cards shimmered to life on the holographic field.  
  
"Now I summon La jinn the mystical genie of the lamp in attack mode!"  
  
A lamp appeared, spewing green smoke, which clashed with the purple of the shadow realm, it gradually pooled together, forming the shape of a man, with a wisp of smoke for a tail, instead of legs.  
  
Yugi continued  
  
"Then I also place to cards face down, ending my turn."  
  
Yugi noticed Sora's grey eyes flickered momentarily as she wondered why he didn't attack, and the mists above Yugi parted slightly to let in a single beam of sunshine.  
  
The beam reflected off Sora's cards and onto her eyepiece, with some squinting Yugi could make out every one of her cards.  
  
"Oh, playing it safe are ya? Okay, I summon headless knight to the field!"  
  
The card shimmered into being on the field, and out of the picture climbed a suit of armour, missing the helmet, it spun around and sliced its own card in half.  
  
1450  
  
"That monster can't defeat La jinn, and I'm willing to bet none of your magic cards can help you."  
  
Sora ignored Yugi's puzzled voice;  
  
"Headless knight! Attack!"  
  
The monster charged forward;  
  
"Huh, my attack's way stronger."  
  
The knight sliced the genie's face off and it fell to the floor, before the rest of the green spirit exploded.  
  
Yugi's face fell as well.  
  
"Huh?"  
  
Sora Jade-------Yugi Moto  
  
8000---------------7850  
  
"If you'd bothered to pay attention to the duel, you ave seen my monster grew more powerful before he attacked your monster, its because my deck master powers any monster with the word 'knight' in its name up by 500 attack and defence points."  
  
Yugi grumbled and drew a card, he placed it face down, and summoned Queen's knight in attack mode.  
  
"Fine, it'll have to boost my monsters too."  
  
The knight, named after the playing card, walked over to Sora's side of the field and turned around.  
  
"It also lets me control any monster with the word knight in it's name for a price of 500 life points. Now, my turn I presume?"  
  
Yugi nodded the affirmative, now more annoyed with himself than before.  
  
"Okey dokey then."  
  
Sora was a little uneasy, this midget was supposedly the current world champion, and she was already controlling the game, unless his deck master had a really powerful ability or his face down cards were very strong.  
  
/This pipsqueak is unbeatable? Nah, Tea must 'a confused him with someone else. Just to be sure.../  
  
"I activate Raigeki!"  
  
A lightning bolt slammed down on each of Yugi's face down cards.  
  
"No!!"  
  
"Yep, now I use cost down so that I only have to sacrifice my headless knight to summon Gaia the fierce knight, and yep, he gets a power boost also!"  
  
The knight cantered out of the 2 dimensional world of his card onto the playing field.  
  
"2800"  
  
"Now, both of my monsters! Attack Yugi's life points directly!!"  
  
Yugi's eye gleamed  
  
"Not so fast! I pay 1000 life points to copy your magic card's effect!"  
  
"What?"  
  
Yugi's life points rolled down to 6850.  
  
"And I summon a card which neither of your monsters will be able to defeat, Millennium Shield"  
  
The dark magician swung its arm around in front of Yugi, the millennium shield was attached to its gauntlet and Gaia's blow bounced off, before it could connect with the boy.  
  
"Queen's knight, stop your attack!"  
  
The warrior halted itself.  
  
"Good move, I sure as hell weren't expectin' that."  
  
Thank god I saw that coming, or else I wouldn't of been able to think that fast, god, I wish Yami was here.  
  
"Ah well, your move then."  
  
"Ok."  
  
Yugi drew;  
  
"I summon one monster face down. And place one card down on the field, your move."  
  
Sora Jade-------Yugi Moto  
  
7300---------------6850  
  
/That Pipsqueak's bin playin' a bit better, but I'm still gunna kick his ass./  
  
"I summon King's Knight in attack mode!"  
  
"You have them too?"  
  
"Of course, it's a knight deck, now I get Jack's knight, you better watch out mate, my army's growing all the time!!"  
  
Sora  
  
7300

Queen's Knight – King's knight – Jack's Knight – Gaia the Fierce Knight  
  
2000 ------------------- 2100 ----------- 2400 ----------------- 2800 ------  
  
3000 ---------------- (????)  
  
Millennium Shield – (???????)  
  
6850  
  
Yugi  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Boat 1- VIP deck)  
  
"Ah, this sure is the life, isn't it brother?"  
  
"It sure is Moki."  
  
The two Kaiba brothers were lying back on sun loungers with a cocktail each, the sun was in the sky and each wore only a pair of blue eyes white dragon swimming shorts and sunglasses, a massive pool awaited them, and, the best part, nobody else was around, nobody else had yet qualified to round 2, so the Kaiba brothers could do what ever they wanted.  
  
"Who'd 'ave guessed Mako'd be here?"  
  
"Yeah, and I never knew he had a sister, after we beat them, she gave me her boots as well, and these ones are better than mine were before you went for your light snack."  
  
Seto Kaiba screamed at the top of his voice, it had to of happened, hadn't it, his first proper break in his life, and HE had to show up, the most annoying person on the entire planet.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------  
  
(L-space)  
  
(It is empty, you see nothing, a hamster speeds across your vision, leaving your only exit, the review button.) 


	24. A Crushing Blow

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard)  
  
I do not own yugioh, or Garth Merengi's darkplace,  
  
Oh and {} now signifies thought as kept cutting out the hash's.  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You are about to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
** YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
**

* * *

The Sun beat harshly down on the fleet of boats as they sailed through the sparkling blue water, an albatross soared through the air and watched as 1 boat turned around for Japan with eliminated duellists on board, it flew closer to the flagship of the fleet and saw two boys arguing on the luxurious front deck, while a blond haired woman sat watching them with a smile on her face and a cocktail in her hand. It wheeled around and almost flew straight into the funnel of a second boat behind it.  
  
The bird missed the funnel by millimetres and managed to regain its smooth flight before it almost ran into 4 see-through monsters, it wheeled around again and knocked a caterer off the edge of the boat. After sprawling onto the deck it flew off and away from the fleet, the rest of the humans on the boat were too busy watching the duel to take notice as the first boat steered into the first, crushing the man in the water.  
  
One duellist however, a tall thin man, wearing a cloak, even in the bright daylight jumped over board, and fell through the side of the other boat, a small 'pop' could have been heard if anybody was watching, and the figure's trajectory over the edge of the ship was replayed backwards as he came back over the edge to sitting on a bench in the one spot where no-one appeared to be standing, giving him a clear view of the current duel.  
  
Sora  
  
7300  
  
--- Queen's Knight – King's knight – Jack's Knight – Gaia the Fierce Knight  
  
---------2000 ------------------- 2100 ----------- 2400 ----------------- 2800 -------  
  
------- 3000 -------------------- (????) ---------  
  
--------Millennium Shield – (???????) ---------  
  
6850  
  
Yugi  
  
"And now Yugi, I attack with Gaia The fierce knight!"  
  
The warrior cantered towards Yugi's face down monster and stopped, Gaia reached out with his lance and expression of distaste on his face, he flipped the card over, and his horse reared back in terror as the creature underneath grabbed his lance, Gaia urged his horse backwards but the monster kept its strong grip on his lance, as he fought to keep hold of his lance, and control his steed, the monster let go, sending Gaia flying to the floor. He got to his feet as his horse looked on in despair, annoyed, he threw his lances away and pulled a sword from his belt, he circled the mysterious creature, and without warning lunged, his sword went right through its carapace, and it grabbed his arm, forcing the sword through its chest and out the other side, as Sora looked on in horrific amazement, it lent forwards and bit off Gaia's head, causing them both to explode into miniscule fragments.  
  
"Wow, the special effects budget for man-eater bug have has really increased."  
  
The crowd parted to reveal the speaker, it was a mime covered in various piercings.  
  
"What?"  
  
Strings looked around at the crowd.  
  
"Oh, just 'cos I dress like a mime I never get to speak?"  
  
The crowd absorbed him again as Yugi concentrated on his next move.  
  
/Ok, I have one defence monster on the field, no trap cards down, and a lot of my monsters are unusable, okay, heart of the cards, give me slither and I can win!/  
  
"I activate the magic card pot luck I draw and don't get to see the card, and then I place it in the monster card zone, if it's a magic or a trap card I lose all of my monsters on the field, but if it's a monster, no matter what its level, it automatically gets summoned to the field in attack mode."  
  
He reached out his arm, and snapped it down to his deck to draw a card. He held it facing away from him so that everyone could see what it was, then he laid it on a monster card zone, sparks flew up on the field as a card was formed holographicaly, a creature began to form on top of the card, yes this was it! Yugi's luck had turned, the bright light formed a spherical being.  
  
/oh holy shit!!/  
  
"Kuriiiii."  
  
Sora collapsed with laughter.  
  
"Oh god, that's it!!! Ahahaahahahahahahahah."  
  
Sitting on the field, with a puzzled expression on its face sat...  
  
A Kuriboh? Ahahahaha, that's your come back, jeez, just forfeit already and spare yourself the smoke, hahahah, I mean come on, HAHAHAhahahaha, or are you, are you trying to make me pass out from hahahhahaehehehe laughing?"  
  
Sora climbed to her feet brushing a tear out of her eye.  
  
/ Fuck, the lights changed, I can't see her cards anymore. /  
  
"My turn?"  
  
Yugi nodded.  
  
"Good, now I finish this charade, I use monster reborn to bring back Gaia the fierce knight, and I activate the magic card, polymerisation to fuse it with the curse of dragon, and knight of death in my hand."  
  
The horseman came riding out of the grave and behind him swooped an enormous dragon; he jumped up into the air as his horse exploded beneath him.  
  
Gaia flipped in the air to land on the dragon, and heavy black armour appeared on top of his.  
  
Gaia The dragon knight  
  
3300  
  
"Now Gaia, attack his millennium shield, Jack's knight take out the fuzzball, and the rest of you get his life points."  
  
Yugi fell to the floor as the blows hit him, smoke poured into his lungs and he heard two words that hurt him;  
  
"I won, now hand over your god card, I know you have one."  
  
Yugi slipped it out of his deck and passed it to her as she sauntered off, whistling under her breath.  
  
"Yugi? Are you okay?"  
  
Tea bent over him, trying to urge him up.  
  
"I'm fine Tea, I just want to be alone."  
  
She kept trying to pull him up, so he turned around, glared her in the eyes and yelled;  
  
"Tea, just fuck off!!!!"  
  
She dropped him and ran off to her room crying, Yugi struggled to his feet and shuffled off to his room.

* * *

(Boat 2, Happy Snacker's café)  
  
Ollie stubbed out a joint in the ashtray;  
  
"Are you guys glad I found this spot or what?"  
  
'This spot' was a cannabis café, in international waters, anything went, as long as the tournament officials didn't care, so on board several of the boats, they had opened 'coffee' shops, so that the relaxing duellists could relax with a nice friendly space shake.  
  
"Yeah man,"  
  
Edd answered, reflecting the sunlight across the decking into Weevil Underwood's eye with a knife.  
  
"You know if we bet enough points, afgter are next match, we could qualify for round 2."  
  
"Yeah,"  
  
Chipped in Rob, playing with his brownie,  
  
"And I know just the person to duel."  
  
He picked up his brownie and started to walk down the steps;  
  
"I'll see you guys in half an hour."  
  
"So Edd, there are some movies on the ships TV, wanna see Southpark the movie?"  
  
"Nah, already seen it like 50 times, sorry dude, but I'm gunna go find a duel, apparently qualifiers get to use this big luxury area that no-one else is allowed in, there's an area on each boat, tell you what, you come watch my duel, and I'll buy you a space shake when I qualify."  
  
"Deal."  
  
Edd put down the knife and picked up his duel disk, his glasses flashed in the sun as he strode down the steps.  
  
Ollie followed him, his hash brownie now only a distant memory as he pulled some straw wrapper out of his mini-afro.

* * *

(Speedboat dock, boat 30)  
  
Miswim followed the official into a speedboat dock at the back of boat 30, there was planking around 2 thirds of the dock and a speed boat was tethered to one side, small windows near the top of the high walls revealed that the area went from one side of the boat to the other, and the giant garage style door opened out the back, a plastic box hung from the ceiling over the water. Machinery took up one wall, leaving a space only for one door, and a movable platform sat opposite the box.  
  
"Miswim Yamitoshi, meet Tanto Shino."  
  
The door next to the machinery opened, and in strode a man, he was a big guy, muscles bulged under his white t-shirt, and the duel disk on his arm seemed to draw in the eye, it was a whirlpool of dark and chaotic images, it was almost enough to make the brain crawl out of your ears and use its two halves to cover your eyes just so that it would stop looking at you, and around his neck hung a long, exquisitely carved dagger.

* * *

(L-space)  
  
(It is empty, you see nothing, a hamster speeds across your vision, leaving your only exit, the review button.) 


	25. The Spirit of the Necklace

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard)  
  
I do not own yugioh, southpark, or Garth Merengi's darkplace,  
  
Oh and {} now signifies thought as kept cutting out the hash's.  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You are about to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Boat 30)  
  
Tanto pointed a pistol at the Goth;  
  
"Goodnight."  
  
He said, firing the gun.  
  
A patch of blood blossomed from Miswim's chest as she got hit and fell to the floor.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Yugi's cabin)  
  
"Quit Moping around dude,"  
  
Tristan tried to get his little buddy to snap out of his reverie;  
  
"You wanna play a game?"  
  
Yugi still stoned from his last duel just grunted.  
  
"Come on, you must want to do something, hey don't you like that American show southpark?"  
  
"Mih."  
  
"The movie's on in half an hour or so, do you want to watch it?"  
  
"Mih."  
  
Yugi grunted again and threw his translator across the room and passed out, his duel disk falling off his arm.  
  
"Fine, I've only got one thing I can do, I must duel for Yugi. If Tea can win him duels, then it must be easy, especially with his deck, I just have to find someone."  
  
Tristan slipped Yugi's duel disk onto his arm, and collected the translator from the floor.  
  
"This one's for you, buddy."  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(????)  
  
"MALIK ISHTAR?"  
  
"Yes? Who is it?"  
  
"WHERE IS THE MILLENNIUM NECKLACE?"  
  
Malik raised his millennium rod;  
  
"Who are you?"  
  
"DEATH, NOW FETCH ME THE MILLENNIUM NECKLACE BEFORE I SEND YOU TO THE DEEPEST REACHES OF THE FOULEST CIRCLE OF HELL!"  
  
Malik ran to the bedside table and fished out his sister's millennium item. His legs were no longer under his control.  
  
"PUT IT ON!"  
  
Again, without willing them to, Malik's hands fastened the necklace around his neck.  
  
A bright light filled the cramped room.  
  
"Why am I in a man's body?"  
  
"ISIS THE FORTUNE TELLER?"  
  
"I prefer the word prophet if it's all the same to you."  
  
The spirit controlling Malik's body turned around and unbuttoned her trousers.  
  
"Wow, I'm a big boy."  
  
"BACK TO THE MATTER AT HAND, I HAVE COME....."  
  
"To duel me for my soul, yes I no, do you think these earrings suit me?"  
  
She said, holding up Malik's long dangly ear rings.  
  
"UM,"  
  
Said Death, a little put off.  
  
"THEY SUIT THE BODY YOU'RE IN. NOW, TO THE DUEL?"  
  
"You know it is fated that I win."  
  
"I OFTEN DO NOT AGREE WITH FATE, AND BESIDES, IT IS NOT UP TO HIM."  
  
Death pulled a deck from some recess in his robe and slammed it into his skeletal duelling disk.  
  
"IT IS TIME FOR US TO BEGIN THE DUEL!"  
  
"It always sounded snappier when the pharaoh said it, oh well."  
  
The spirit held Malik's hands an inch apart, forming a cup, she concentrated and a deck of duel monsters cards appeared. She reached up her sleeve and replaced the cards in the Egyptian style duel disk with the ones she had summoned from her soul room.  
  
"Let us begin." ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------- (Boat 2)  
  
"You're Rex Raptor?"  
  
"What of it?"  
  
"Rob Machin, do you want to duel?"  
  
"Oh yes, what's the bet?"  
  
"4500 points and one card I pick."  
  
"That doesn't sound so great to me, Machin."  
  
Rob folded his arms.  
  
"Then what stakes do you want?"  
  
"How about you bet 5000 points, that way, when I win I qualify for the next round."  
  
"And what happens if by some sheer fluke I win?"  
  
"Why you get 4500 points, which is all you need, and I'll throw in an extra card from my deck that I pick, fair?"  
  
"Sounds fair to me."  
  
"Then let's duel fat-boy."  
  
A grin passed over Rob's face for a second as the pterodactyl wings on Rex's duel disk opened up.  
  
"Oh it's on."  
  
The large clock on Rob's wrist spouted large hands that rotated into position to form a duel disk.  
  
"No deckmasters, they annoy the crap outa me."  
  
"I don't use them much either."  
  
"I'll go first ginger boy."  
  
"If you want."  
  
Rex snapped a card off the top of his deck, and the duel began. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------- (L-space)  
  
(A big blue button looms up out of the fog, in curly writing it says 'review', you are drawn to it, as a moth to a flame.) 


	26. Any last words?

(L-Space)

(In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard)  
  
I do not own yugioh, southpark, or Garth Merengi's darkplace,  
  
Oh and {} now signifies thought as kept cutting out the hash's.  
  
FYI Isis is the spirit of the millennium necklace  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You are about to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
**YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM**  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Boat 30)

Tanto dropped the gun into the water and walked over to Miswim's limp body, he picked it up and dropped it in the clear plastic box that was suspended from the ceiling, then he took her deck and fed it into a slot in one of the machines on the wall. The machine regurgitated Miswim's deck after making some terrifying noises, so he slipped it back in her duel disk, this done, he shut the door to the box and slipped a lock through the clasp.  
  
Tanto reached behind him and pushed a large button on the wall.  
  
The box started to rise.  
  
He picked up a walkie talkie.  
  
"Jim, Tanto here, everything is ready, I'll see you bright and early tomorrow morning."  
  
And with this he headed to his cabin, while the plastic box rose to the roof of the small dock.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ------------------------------  
  
(????)  
  
"I SUMMON THE SPIRIT OF THE DEPARTED PHAROH IN ATTACK MODE."  
  
The card materialised on the field and out climbed a figure that looked suspiciously like Yugi.  
  
"AND THEN I PLACE TWO CARDS FACE DOWN AND END MY TURN."  
  
Isis, normally confident in a duel, was a little shaken, though she took pains not to show it, she could foretell the future, but then Death could remember everything, the past, the present, the future, he was infallible and her necklace had been wrong before. Each person knew what cards were face down and which cards were in each others hands, Isis glanced into the future and saw a draw, but if Death had done something to tip the balance in his favour, then her necklace couldn't see it, her only possible course of action was to follow her necklace's predestined fate and hope it didn't get her killed.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ------------------------------

(Boat 2)  
  
"Haha, one of my favourite combos right away!"  
  
Rex shouted at Robert across the duelling field.  
  
"You're going down straight away, so I put 2 cards down on the field, then I play tribute to the ancient beasts, which makes me sacrifice my hand to the grave yard to summon any monster from my deck which has less stars than the total from the monsters sacrificed, and it includes ritual monsters, so, I think its time you said herro to my rickle fliend."  
  
Rex Raptor inserted his entire hand into his graveyard;  
  
"Now I summon my mightiest creature in my entire deck, you ginger freak, you can not hope to defeat me! Say hello to......."  
  
He selected a card from his deck and slipped it onto the monster card zone, it materialised on the field and above it, white lines began to form, first one way, then the other, cris-crossing until there was a solid circle made out of white light, solid, that is, apart from a pentagram of darkness, in the middle of the disc of light. The light turned first from white, to red, then to blue, then finally to purple. A low rumbling noise started to raise in tempo as the deck under the duellists started shaking while a dinolythic being began to rise from the 5 pointed star of pure darkness.  
  
Rex Raptor began a croaky maniacal laugh as his monster rose further and further from the circle, obscured by purple light. The monsters Rex had discarded, appeared on the field herding what looked like the souls of children towards the circle. As the souls were absorbed one by one into the circle the rumbling increased and the audience, as was collecting started to lose there balance, one, a small child wearing an orange parka, slipped over the edge to be crushed between the boats in the sea below. From the back of the crowd some Japanese could be made out:  
  
"Ara mai tentei otaku ryuu Kenny!"  
  
Rob unthinkingly shouted;  
  
"You bastard!"  
  
At the same time as another child shouted:  
  
"Otaku yarou!"  
  
The ghosts of the monsters Rex had discarded filed into the circle as well, the rumbling was now so loud and so fast it was forming a rhythm.  
  
The last monster filed into the light and the circle disappeared, all that was left was the pentagram, made blindingly obvious by the fact that no-one could see it.  
  
4000 / 4000  
  
Robert looked at the pentagram, he couldn't see it, but then he couldn't see anything behind it, the absence of light, formed the picture on his eyeballs of a hole in space cut out as a child would cut shapes into paper. His eyes panned up the monster, no, it couldn't be, purple feet, a long purple tail, the rumbling had changed into a haunting melody, he tried to keep it out of his mind as his eyes panned up, past the scaly green belly, past the round jaw (which looked scarily like a blue eyes white dragons') then he let his gaze fall on those big spaced out eyes and he knew that his worst fear was coming true, in the back ground he heard singing;  
  
"I love you, you love me, we're a ha-py fam-i-ly"  
  
"It's Barney the fucking purple dinosaur!"  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(????)  
  
A bell went off, Death looked inside his robe and pulled out a lifetimer which had jut emptied, it was wrapped in an orange Parka, and Isis could just make out 'kenny...' on the name plate.  
  
"OH BUGGER, I'LL BE BACK!!"  
  
Death ran through the door without even bothering to open it, Isis sat down and looked around;  
  
"Wow, I haven't been in a body for thousands of years, things sure have changed."  
  
She pulled open the top of Marik's trousers and looked down.  
  
A red blush rose to her cheeks.  
  
"Shit!! I'm in a man's body, a _big_ man's body, but still a man's, this wasn't what I thought was going to happen."  
  
Isis paced the room;  
  
"I heard from other prophets that you can never see your own death, I guess they were right."  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(boat 2)  
  
"Yes, that's right, the most powerful dinosaur in the entire game, I can not attack this round, so I end my turn, your go tub-tubs, hurry up and make whatever pathetic move you can make before I win!!"  
  
Rob just gave Rex a funny look;  
  
"Ok, I guess I've lost then, I suppose I'll just play mirror magic to copy your magic card you played last turn, and sacrifice the 5 monsters in my hand to summon _my_ most powerful monster."  
  
A golden orb fell out of the holographic card that rolled out onto the field.  
  
0000/0000  
  
"That's it?"  
  
Rob nodded.  
  
"Oh, ok, are you done?"  
  
"Not yet."  
  
The Orb rose off the field, and cracks began to appear around it, as they grew bigger, golden light streamed out of them, the orb seemed to be unfolding, the cracks turning into different parts of the emerging monster, its attack power began to rise, while rob did some quick calculations in his head.  
  
{Ok, so that's Jinzo, tri-horn, 7 coloured fish, kuriboh, and my summoned skull sacrificed.}  
  
As the orb gradually unfolded, Rex gasped in amazement, he knew what it was;  
  
"Wheeler lost it? Jeez, what a loser he is."  
  
The creature was completely unfolded now, and a row of fins unfolded from its head.  
  
9850/6600  
  
"Now I win straight away if I use its effect to give it half my life points;"  
  
1350/1600  
  
Rob raised his arm to point at Rex.  
  
"Winged dragon Of Ra, ATTACK!!"  
  
The Egyptian god monster flew towards Barney the dinosaur, which ran away, but the flying god chased it around and around in circles until it got bored and fired _'la-zer'_ beams at the purple monstrosity from its eyes until the singing dinosaur caught fire.  
  
"Now don't you wish you hadn't summoned that demon to begin with?"  
  
Asked Rob.  
  
Now that Barney had stopped running around, Ra swooped in and grabbed Barney in his claws, flying up into the air again, Ra spun around and slammed the dinosaur into Rex, causing him to fall over, his life points began to drop quickly until there was none left.  
  
Rex lay there for a bit, then the purple clouds of the fake shadow realm faded away to leave him sprawled on the deck of boat number 2.  
  
Rob walked over to the loser;  
  
"Rex, can I have my new cards now?"  
  
"Yeah, but Barney's a ritual, and the card I'm giving you is a dark grey, the crappest card known to man, so you won't be able to use Barney even if you did take him."  
  
Rex passed his deck to the victor of the duel.  
  
"I'll take this fossilized amber."  
  
Rob, not liking the younger boy, dropped his cards on the deck of the boat and headed off to find Edd and Ollie.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
The fleet of boats gracefully motored away from the setting sun as it sunk into the sea, the light tinting the sky green as it was filtered through the depths of the Pacific Ocean.  
  
Kaiba watched the sunset from the back of boat 1, the luxury qualifiers lounge opened up onto the back of the ship, he could not appreciate the beauty, 5 times, 5 times Joey had emptied the snack bar indoors, 5 times Mai had said that he should get another jacket, 5 times had Joey challenged him to a duel, and 5 times Joey waited till Kaiba was in the water then swam up to him and stolen his swimming shorts. His sister Serenity was taking up his favourite sun lounger, the one that he had got the tournament officials to make especially for him. This tournament was turning into hell.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(????)  
  
Death walked through the door without opening it again.  
  
"SORRY I TOOK SO LONG, THERE WAS AN OUTBREAK OF DISEASE IN IRAQ, THE AMERICANS SAY IT WAS BIN LADEN, BUT I SAW JEB BUSH HURRYING AWAY FROM A GAS CANISTER IN THE MIDDLE OF THE CAPITAL CITY."  
  
Isis stood up;  
  
"Shall we get this thing going then?"  
  
"CERTAINLY, WHERE'S THE HOLOGRAM?"  
  
"What? Oh, I understand, in about 10 minutes you are going to go back in time to when you ran out of the room to reap souls and finish the duel because otherwise it would have been counted as a forfeit, and therefore I would have won and Fate's deal would have been off."  
  
"OH YES, I REMEMBER NOW."  
  
"But I won anyway so you have to return any souls you have collected from the items and leave me alone."  
  
Death pulled down his hood and looked at Isis.  
  
"YOU WON? REALLY? I CAN REMEMBER THE DUEL YOU KNOW."  
  
"Well it was worth a shot, oh well."  
  
"WOULD YOU CARE TO SAY SOME LAST WORDS?"  
  
The Egyptian thought for a second.  
  
"Yep, um, how about; 'The one thing I regret is never regretting anything."  
  
"OK THEN."  
  
Death swung his scythe towards the thin blue line attaching Isis to Marik's body.  
  
"No wait I......."  
  
But it was too late.  
  
Death walked into the room.  
  
"YOU'RE EARLY."  
  
"YEAH I KNOW, BUT THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT NOW."  
  
"TOO TRUE, I TAKE IT YOU LOST SOME LIFE POINTS?"  
  
"ALL BUT 1 AS A MATTER OF FACT."  
  
"DID SHE PLAY WELL?"  
  
"AS WELL AS CAN BE EXPECTED, I JUST WANTED TO EXPERIENCE BEING STONED."  
  
"FAIR DOS."  
  
And with this the slightly younger Death (though time doesn't affect him) took several steps in a direction that was neither up, down, left, right, forwards or back.  
  
While the second Death walked off to find some munchies.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(L-space)  
  
_(The room is empty, you see nothing, a hamster speeds across your vision, leaving your only 1 exit, the review button.)_


	27. Invader Tim

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard)  
  
I do not own yugioh, southpark, or Garth Merengi's darkplace, or Invader Zim  
  
Oh and {} now signifies thought as kept cutting out the hash's.  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You are about to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
**YUGIOH,  
** **ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
**  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(boat 17)  
  
"So you wish to duel me!?!?"  
  
"Well I kinda want to qualify for round 2 before the big rush."  
  
"Hahahahahahahahahaha."  
  
Edd looked at the teen in disbelief.  
  
"Nobody ever says hahaha, they just laugh."  
  
"I knew that, I'm normal, I love earth!!!"  
  
Shouted the small teenager with the waxed black hair.  
  
"Now yes, you duel me, for 4500 points and 1 card!"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Then let us duel!!!"  
  
The weird looking kid slammed his hand down on his flying saucer shaped duel disk, the top folded open to reveal his deck and out of the sides folded his field.  
  
"Uh, just one thing, what's your name?"  
  
"Z- er Tim."  
  
"Zertim?"  
  
"No, Tim, I love earth!!"  
  
Tim raised his hand in a quick salute when he said that before placing his deck master into the side, his dog sat watching.  
  
"O...k...."  
  
Edd selected his deck master, as the purple clouds formed around him, moisture creature's face could be made out behind him.  
  
Behind Tim however, something entirely different was happening.  
  
"Since you challenged the almighty Tim I get to go first!"  
  
"Fine by me."  
  
"Though you may....er..."  
  
Edd had interrupted Tim in the middle of his speech, he was not pleased.  
  
"I was going to be kind, but now I shall completely annihilate you!"  
  
"Give me your best shot 'Tim'."  
  
Tim placed two face down cards on the field and summoned la jinn the mystical genie of the lamp.  
  
"Ha, how do you like me now? You do not know whether I have traps or not!!!"  
  
Edd drew and placed two cards on the field also, then without saying a word he summoned a monster, the card appeared on the arena and black smoke poured out of it, then a warrior clothed in blue, red and purple leaped out of it and into the air, his cloak billowing behind him.  
  
2100/500  
  
"Now, Moisture creature! Destroy Tim's magic or trap cards."  
  
From behind him his deck master fired viral globules at Tim's trap cards, evaporating them completely.  
  
"Zombyra the dark! Attack La jinn."  
  
The warrior leapt up again and punched La jinn into Tim, forcing him to choke on the cannabis fumes.  
  
"Lesson one, if you're going first never start with an attacking monster."  
  
"Grrrrrr!"  
  
Outside the hologrammatic field, Tim's dog's ears pricked up.  
  
"Your move Mr.Tim."  
  
Tim reached down and drew a card;  
  
"Ahaha, I activate the magic card hamster Wheel to sacrifice 2 pretty powerful monsters from my hand to summon my almighty beast! Peepee!!"  
  
An enormous hamster wheel appeared on the field, and Tim's monsters filed into it, it span round and around until the shapes blurred together, leaving a hamster.  
  
1800/2000  
  
"erbilfwirble."  
  
Edd's head blurred for a second and his mouth flapped about making a weird noise.  
  
"A hamster? ok, so what's its effect?"  
  
"I shall not tell you until I use it."  
  
"Fine, as Zombyra the dark has more attack points I expect you won't be attacking?"  
  
"That is correct earthling."  
  
Edd raised his eyebrows, but took his turn anyway.  
  
"Ok, I activate Raigeki break to discard barrel dragon and destroy peepee."  
  
A finger extended out of the trap card to fire a bolt of lightning at the hamster, but instead of destroying it, Peepee ate the lightning bolt and grew bigger  
  
2100/2300  
  
"You cannot destroy Peepee with Traps or magic! And what does not harm him makes him stronger! 300 attack and defence points stronger to be exact!"  
  
"Cool, ok then, I use monster reborn to bring back barrel dragon from the grave and since his effect may not destroy peepee I'll attack!"  
  
The dragon with the cannons on its back lumbered out of the orange card, it aimed its cannons, but then looked at the hamster.  
  
It lowered its cannons.  
  
The mechanical dragon opened its mouth and said;  
  
"I can't destroy it! It's so cute!!"  
  
The hamster ran towards the barrel dragon and swallowed it  
  
2400/2600  
  
"Oh, are you upset Mr. Payne? Peepee's too cute, no monster under level 8 will attack him, he just swallows them and grows more powerful!!"  
  
"Ok Tim, I've got a proposition for you, I wish to raise the stakes of this duel."  
  
"Really? I was thinking the same thing."  
  
"How about we each bet 2 cards rather than just one, for if I win, I will get Peepee and his ritual card the hamster wheel, and if you win you can pick any two cards from my deck that you want."  
  
Tim thought to himself for a second.  
  
{what I've seen of his deck so far makes me realise its potential, If I win this duel and get 2 cards rather than 1 I can win all the millennium items and take over the world far more easily than with only 1.}  
  
"I accept your wager, Edd."  
  
"Fine, then I'll switch Zombyra the dark into defence mode and end my turn."  
  
"Haha, Peepee eat Zombyra the dark!"  
  
The hamster dived forward and swallowed Edd's warrior whole.  
  
2700/2900  
  
"Now try and defeat me!"  
  
Edd considered his position for a moment before drawing his card.  
  
{There is one way I can defeat Peepee, but the conditions have to be just right...}  
  
"I summon one monster to the field; face down, your move Tim."  
  
"Haha, I attack your feeble face down monster with Peepee!"  
  
The hamster charged forwards and tore the card into 2 pieces and put them into its mouth  
  
3000/3200  
  
A spear cretin showed its head through peepee's jaw just before it was swallowed, a light blipped on Tim's headset.  
  
"What now?"  
  
"Well when spear cretin is flipped and destroyed we each bring back 1 monster from the grave and put it face down defence."  
  
Tim smiled to himself and slipped the man-eater bug he'd discarded to summon Peepee onto his duel disk.  
  
Edd slipped his barrel dragon back onto his disk; it was all part of his plan.  
  
"So you're giving me reinforcements now? Why not resign and get it over with?"  
  
"Do you end your turn?"  
  
"I put one card on the field first! Now move before I utterly destroy you."  
  
"Ok."  
  
Edd drew, he had only one thing left to do, and if this didn't work, hell, he could always destroy Peepee with Moisture creature and Megamorph.  
  
"I use the special ability of my Lava golem to summon it to your side of the field by sacrificing your two monsters!"  
  
Shouted Edd over the noise of Tim's dog singing the doom song.  
  
"Ha, you can not destroy peepee by monster effect either you fool, I......"  
  
Peepee turned into white light and mixed with the man eater bug to form enough duel monster essence for an 8 star monster, a cage slammed down around Tim....  
  
"Argh, I'm trapped they're going to take me to a lab!!!"  
  
And the silvery light formed into a giant lava golem. Edd's face down card was pushed up by the monster underneath, which got into battle position.  
  
"Barrell dragon use your effect to take down lava golem!"  
  
Three coins flipped into the air, a heads, a tails and....  
  
A heads,  
  
Lava golem exploded under the volley of fire from barrel dragon's cannons.  
  
"Now I pay 500 life points to destroy your face down card with moisture creature's ability."  
  
"Then I move moisture creature onto the field and equip it with megamorph."  
  
Moisture creature doubled in size, and floated down to the field.  
  
Edd set his face into an evil leer and cackled;  
  
"Now my pretties attack Tim!"  
  
Both barrel dragon and moisture creature fired their weapons at 'Tim', and he disappeared under the explosion, his life points dropped to zero and his lungs almost burst from the pot smoke.  
  
The holograms shut off and Edd collected his cards, Tim's dog pulled out a muffin from somewhere and ate it, then Tim shouted  
  
"I'm gunna sing the doom song!!"  
  
This seemed to excite the dog who sung with his master as they frolicked to the next ship;  
  
"Doom, Doom, Doom, Doom, Doom, Doom, Doom, Doom, Doom, Doom, Doom, Doom, doooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooom! The end."  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(L-space)  
  
(The room is empty, you see nothing, a hamster speeds across your vision, leaving your only 1 exit, the review button.) 


	28. Typhoon attack!

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard)  
  
I do not own yugioh, southpark, or Garth Merengi's darkplace, or Invader Zim  
  
Oh and {} now signifies thought as kept cutting out the hash's.  
  
FYI Isis is the spirit of the millennium necklace  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You are about to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him, the screen follows the paper as it falls down to the deck of a boat.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Boat 1: Qualifier's area)  
  
Kaiba was getting frustrated, now, not only was Joey taking up the whole place but some other fool called Robert had qualified, and him and his gormless friend Ollie who just sat around the pool smoking joints.  
  
Seto walked past the swimming pools and past the Hawaiian fruit bar, he needed to be on his own, have some time to think.  
  
His duel disk caught on the diving board tower and the arrogant CEO almost broke his arm before he realised what had happened and stopped walking, he snarled and wheeled around to free the disk. After checking to make sure no- one saw him, Kaiba stomped off again towards the small balcony overlooking the back of the ship. When he arrived at his destination, much to his horror and dismay, somebody was already out there.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Boat 1: Stern Balcony)  
  
The figure stood there, the wind blowing against the back of the ship, pushing his long hair out of his face, a small scar just above his right eye was clearly visible.  
  
As Edd stood there watching the wake of the ship, he heard the door open, without looking around he greeted the head of Kaibacorp.  
  
"Hi."  
  
"Who are you?"  
  
"Me name's Edd."  
  
Edd turned his head away from the wake of the big boat.  
  
"You're Kaiba right?"  
  
Edd held out his hand but Kaiba just stared at it.  
  
"What are you doing in this area; duellists can only bring one person each, and only 5 duellists have checked in."  
  
"Well I guess I snuck in then."  
  
"Well then I'm afraid I'm going to have to call security."  
  
"There isn't much point in doing that Seto."  
  
Kaiba grimaced at the impolite use of his first name.  
  
"Because I have qualified, I just haven't bothered to check in, I saw something out here and I thought I'd check it before I signed in."  
  
"Then check in now."  
  
"Love to but I'm gunna stay out here for another 10 minutes first."  
  
Kaiba glowered at the teenager, but Edd just turned to look at the wake again, forgetting Kaiba's presence.  
  
The CEO was really pissed off now, he reached up to tap Edd on the shoulder, but his deck blew out of his duel disk and through the open door into the large room full of swimming pools. Kaiba dived after his cards and the wind blew the door shut. He managed to collect his deck together but when he went for the door again the wind had strengthened and was holding the door closed while Edward just stood staring at the water, his glasses held to his face by the wind.  
  
As Kaiba stared through the door, trying to push it open, his eyes fell to the surgence of water that the strange teen was watching, and the lights from the deck reflected off a black object, he let go of the door handle and stood up. A small black submarine was rising out of the water, battling the choppy waves of the gale force wind.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Boat 1: control room)  
  
"Sir, a stealth sub has just shown up on the radar."  
  
Captain Omen, an experienced captain in his 50's with a distinguished white beard and a bald head under his captain's hat, looked at the radar screen shown to him by the inexperienced 22 year old helmsmen.  
  
"And the weather is acting very strange, I suggest evasive action sir."  
  
Captain Omen nodded his head.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Boat 1: Stern Balcony)  
  
Suddenly the wind patterns on the water by the submarine reversed pattern and the sub was blown from the boat as the ship was encouraged forwards, the clouds overhead seemed to be rushing into the centre of this weather manifestation.  
  
The fleet speeded away as an anti-typhoon formed, pushing a large well directly down, in between the sub and the fleet. All the lights on the boat went out as power was diverted to the engines to get the boats as far from the phenomenon as possible.  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
As the night passed the fleet escaped the forming of two other typhoons that joined with the first, the submarine was no longer visible.  
  
Once the lights turned back on the duellists carried on with their duels, for many into the night, and as the sun came out of the water all but 5 people had qualified for round 2 or been kicked out of the tournament.  
  
Down in the speedboat bay of boat 30, inside a plastic box hanging from the ceiling Miswim awoke.  
  



	29. The dragon lurks

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard)  
  
I do not own yugioh, southpark, or Garth Merengi's darkplace,

Oh and {} now signifies thought as kept cutting out the hash's.  
  
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor. You are about to enter the world of my imagination; You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'  
  
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him, the screen follows the paper as it falls down to the deck of a boat.)  
  
Cue the theme music  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Intro scenes)  
  
(Explosions!)  
  
(Duels)  
  
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)  
  
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)  
  
(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)  
  
(Big Explosion)  
  
YUGIOH,  
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(Boat 30: Speedboat dock)  
  
Miswim slowly sat up, she looked around groggily taking in the slight blue tint of the plastic box. Miswim moved and felt a slight pain in her breast, she reached up with her hand to investigate the problem. She found a hypodermic dart embedded in her skin, with a slight grunt of pain she pulled it out and threw it against the wall of the box, the sharp movement caused the box to rock alarmingly, Miswim curled into a ball to try and slow the rocking but poked herself in the neck with her duel disk.  
  
Miswim examined her duel disk and noticed all her cards were in water proof wallets.  
  
She slowly got to her feet, bracing herself against the walls of the box.  
  
Miswim looked down and saw the water at the bottom of the room, with a brief moment of vertigo she reached for the handle on the door to the box and tried to open it, but it was locked, there was no way in or out of the small plastic cage apart from a few air slots in the top.  
  
Miswim slumped to the floor of the cage, and the other side of the dock a door opened, and a figure walked to the other side of the water, pressing a button on a set of controls mounted there, the platform rose up until it was level with her cage, a voice came over her earpiece.  
  
"Good morning Miswim."  
  
She looked across at the figure, it was Tanto Shino, the man who had shot her with a dart gun.  
  
"What time is it?"  
  
She asked groggily, the dart's after effects still hadn't worn off.  
  
"5 O'clock in the morning."  
  
Miswim groaned.  
  
"I'm sorry I had to drug you, but otherwise you wouldn't have slept during the night, and it also made it a lot easier to prepare for our duel."  
  
"Why couldn't we duel last night?"  
  
Miswim carefully got to her feet; the room seemed to be spinning.  
  
"The timing of the end of the first round needed to coincide with our duel, once you finished in the virtual world you were to be kept unconscious until the start of the day in which round 1 was to end."  
  
"So how long have I been unconscious?"  
  
"12 hours."  
  
"So round 1 ends today? Everybody's qualified?"  
  
"Well everybody apart from you and 3 other slots, which 7 guys are competing for, including your good friends the Bakura's."  
  
"The Bakuras? There are two of them?"  
  
"Yes, they are...... brothers of the soul; I suppose you could call them twins. You dueles one of them, the other wished to help you when you got upset afterwards."  
  
"Whoops."  
  
Miswim got a twinge of conscience.  
  
"And neither Bakura has duelled since, they're looking for you."  
  
"Oh."  
  
Miswim's face fell further.  
  
"Don't worry, if one wins the others points then they only have to beat a mister Brodie Smith. Which shouldn't be too hard."  
  
"Well good."  
  
"Anyway, back to the matter in hand, there are cameras and microphones all over the ships but only one camera in this room, they can't hear us so we can say what we want."  
  
"Who?"  
  
"The security for the tournament."  
  
"What can go wrong at a duel monsters tournament?"  
  
Tanto grinned;  
  
"There has never been a duel monsters tournament without something going on behind the lines."  
  
"What's going on here then?"  
  
"I can't tell you yet."  
  
"Why, you seem to be talking pretty freely?"  
  
"My employers are not ones to reveal what is happening to anybody, besides, you are not equipped to deal with this yet."  
  
"If my understanding is correct, if I lose this duel I drown right?"  
  
"Yes, that will be the price for failure, whenever you lose life points your crate will be lowered, and when they are all gone you will drown. And if your deck master dies, the cable holding you up will be disconnected by an autonomous unit. In a sadistic kind of way it's quite brilliant."  
  
Miswim was getting slightly upset.  
  
"So I'm going to die?"  
  
She screamed.  
  
"Not so loud please, it goes straight in my ear, and you won't if you win."  
  
"So I'm supposed to trust my deck to keep me alive."  
  
"Yes;"  
  
Tanto sighed.  
  
"When I met you I never thought you'd turn out to be a coward, you have no confidence?"  
  
"I am not afraid to die!"  
  
Shouted Miswim.  
  
"I _am_ ready to die! That's the problem! There's nothing worthwhile in my life! And yes it is better to die relying on my own skill than to survive on the help of others, but I'm upset because I can't believe you can't show any compassion! The world is more bleak and dismal than I ever even imagined!"  
  
Miswim subsided into a few sobs, while Tanto just sighed.  
  
"Miss Yamitoshi the reason I appear to show no compassion is because your Noir Anubis came to you for this tournament."  
  
"What?"  
  
Miswim stopped crying and stared at the muscle bound man in front of her.  
  
"Yes, it was I who gave you your 3 most treasured cards, I told you to use it to your advantage in situations beyond your control."  
  
Tanto's duel disk sprang open, it had originally been the Zen symbol of black and white pieces melding, but the blobs flipped out to form his duelling field revealing his deck.  
  
"You will win one card from my deck and instant qualification to the next round if you win. If you lose you will die, oh and for the record you still get cannabis smoke every time you lose life points and when you exhale it will fill up that box preety fast so I think you'll probably get very stoned."  
  
Miswim gulped at the closeness of what could be her death.  
  
"Pick your deck master."  
  
Miswim selected her Anubis Noir, she could feel in her gut that now was why Anubis Noir was in her deck.  
  
Tanto Shino summoned an enormous flame which burned around his feet, if Miswim looked closely she could make out an enormous red dragon scuttling from flame to flame.  
  
She was more worried than before.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
  
(L-space)  
  
I do not own Brodie, there another disclaimer, anyway the next chapter will be built on location in the well of lost plots, now I have very limited space left for which non-plot essential characters get to round 3, the round 2 drawings have already been decided so if you want a character from this list to go through then in your review you have to state the name of the character and tell me which series of books the well of lost plots is from;  
  
Derek Conklin  
  
Sora Jade  
  
Bakura (the spirit)  
  
Ryou  
  
Wind Striker  
  
Tanto Shino (his prize for being an eliminator could enter him into the tournament.)  
  
Marcus Jamiron (not been used in the tournament yet but will have at least one appearance before this story ends.)  
  
Miswim (this is for surviving this duel, I have a strong impulse to kill her off.)  
  
Joey  
  
Thanks for reading  
  
see you later


	30. The Serene duel begins

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard)

I do not own yugioh, southpark, or Garth Merengi's darkplace, or Invader Zim

Oh and {} now signifies thought as kept cutting out the hash's.

I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor.

You are about to enter the world of my imagination;

You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'

(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him, the screen follows the paper as it falls down to the deck of a boat.)

Cue the theme music

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Intro scenes)

(Explosions!)

(Duels)

(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)

(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)

(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)

(Big Explosion)

YUGIOH,

ENTER THE STONER'S REALM

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Boat 30: Speedboat dock)

"As you are risking your life I shall let you go first."

"Oh how nice of you."

Miswim sighed and drew her cards. She didn't know if she was going to survive the duel, she was having difficulty keeping her breath under control before she started to hyperventilate.

Miswim looked at her cards. A small voice in the back of her head that she'd never heard before spoke up;

_We can win this one._

What?

_Trust your deck, we can beat this guy, we'll be back in the tournament in no time._

Miswim found herself looking across at her enemy.

With neither a smile nor a frown Tanto seemed to be projecting a slight grin, not at his cards but at her;

_He thinks you can win, look at him, he seems callous because he knows you can win and that if you don't then it will be your fault._

I'm going to have to say what? One more time.

This train of thought was something knew, she'd never heard it before but yer t was instantly old and part of her.

_Trust your deck, you can beat him, he wouldn't of given you Noir Anubis unless it meant something._

Then a small treacherous voice, one she'd heard too many times before, the voice that was labelled paranoia spoke up:

_I can't believe how stupid you are, god, first of all he probably knows everything you can do with Anubis Noir, and if he wanted to beat you he could, and why duel to the death? What possible advantage do the tournament officials gain from our death, I mean come on, anybody would think this was a manga or a badly written piece of fanfiction._

.......................................................................................................

For some reason Miswim felt a sudden surge of confidence.

My deck can beat almost anything he can throw at me, hell I defeated an Egyptian god card.

_Stupid cheating Joey._

Miswim drew her sixth card.

"You think you can scare me into making a mistake? Give it your best shot. I summon one monster face down in defence mode and lay down two magic cards."

Miswim slipped two traps into their slots,

I'm not gonna give this bastard any advantage I can.

Tanto layed two trap cards on the field.

"Let me see the first part of your strategy."

The bare-chested duellist flicked his wrist, letting one card in his hand fly into the air, with the other he snatched it out of the air, swooping it down onto the black half of his field.

A fountain of lights sparkled on the air in front of him and a card gradually took form.

"Attack Miswim's monster!"

Out of the card charged 3 goblins, the strike force grabbed the card Miswim had summoned and ripped it to pieces before the monster inside had a chance to fight back, as the pieces fell apart Tanto saw the ghost of a Witch of the black forest get sucked into her deck.

"Thank you. My turn?"

Tanto graciously nodded his head. His Goblin Attack force wandered across thin air and sat down on their card that was now in a defensive postion

"Great."

Miswim drew, and she knew what to do, it was if she had been looking at a piece of a puzzle and hadn't been able to see where it fitted, in her mind she turned it in all direction, and the second she saw what card she had, the piece just glided effortlessly into place.

"I place two cards on the field then I activate card destruction."

A holographic tornado swept into each hand pulling them by means of a tractor beam into the graveyard.

"Then I activate the special ability of magical Bob, special summoning him to the field in attack mode."

Her duel disc followed her orders while she drew her new cards.

Just what I wanted.

"I now normal summon vengeful Bob and because I have two Bob monsters on the field Friendly Bob gets special summoned from my deck as well."

A warrior heavily clad in armour stepped out of his card and almost immediately a door opened just above Miswim's deck and another warrior with the same coat of arms on his chest walked out and hi-fived the two already there.

The three soldiers stood to attention as Miswim eyed them.

These holograms are really getting very good.

"Now! Magical Bob take out his monster!"

The warrior with the glowing armour strolled across to the goblins, who were sitting cowering on their card, and swung his sword down over his head to plunge into the heart of the lead goblin when a mirror appeared in front of his glowing swords point, and before he could holt his downwards thrust he pierced the mirror, and from the mirror came the same blade, Miswim could only watch in horror as the momentum carried the sword all the way into the heart of the mirror's magical Bob at the same time as the arm coming out stabbed into Miswim's.

The mirror and the warrior exploded and another team of goblins hurried out of the trap card which had produced the mirror.

They ran to each of Miswim's warriors and started fighting them. Mournful Bob, a slow moving knight, walked out of Miswim's deck to avenge his fallen conterpart to be swarmed by goblins as well.

"Reflect and Refrain."

Tanto said.

"A simple trap that destroys the attacking monster and prevents monsters of the same type from attacking for 3 turns."

The goblins weren't harming Miswim's monsters but they were preventing them from making any move towards the attack force.

"It's extremely useful against duellists who only use one type, so I hope for your sake you haven't loaded your deck with warriors or else you will lose precious time as my life points remain unharmed."

"Oh don't worry, that's one trap that won't be able to catch me."

"End turn?"

"Sure, why not?"

Oh well, I've got something else up my sleeve which he may not enjoy.

(Boat 3)

"Duke."

Tristan stepped out from behind a small red balloon.

"Tristan."

Tristan approached the dice master.

"I see that you are in the tournament."

Tristan indicated the enormous dice on Duke's arm that was obviously a duel disc, in the shape of a cube.

"Yeah, hey you seen Serenity around?"

"That's it!"

Tristan suddenly shouted at Duke.

"I challenge you to a duel!"

Duke stared at him.

"You're in this?"

"Yugi asked me to fight one duel for him with a mixture of his cards and mine."

"Oh so you have some then."

Tristan was seething with anger.

"Don't try to distract me I'm gunna whoop your sorry ass out of this tournament."

"How many points does Yugi have?"

"5000."

"Same here, look, there isn't many people left so how about all or nothing?"

"Well..."

"Ah I see he'll let you duel with a few points, but he doesn't want you to get him kicked out."

Tristan's face was glowing bright red with anger as he stared at Duke Devlin, inventor of the dungeon dice monsters, a spin off from the duel monster card game.

"He told me to qualify him."

"Fine... deckmasters?"

"You know it."

"Strike ninja for me."

"Super Robayarou"

"Fine."

The deckmasters jumped out of each duel disc, Duke's cube unfold creadting an odd looking field with one monster field in the middle and the other 4 at each corner with their respective magic slots underneath.

The purple fog billowed out of each duel station. The duel was on!

----------------------------------------------

(L-space)

Ouch, will Tristan manage to defeat duke or will Yugi be kicked out of the tournament, will miswim win and qualify for the next round? Or will she lose and die?

Anything can happen in the next chapter. See ya

(A strange smelling puff of smoke filled the air and as it cleared you can see Mr. Towel running from the screen carrying his typewriter. Leaving just a blue button marked review)


	31. The dragon attacks!

* * *

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard)

I do not own yugioh, southpark, or Garth Merengi's darkplace, or Invader Zim

Oh and {} now signifies thought as kept cutting out the hash's.

I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor.

You are about to enter the world of my imagination;

You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'

(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him, the screen follows the paper as it falls down to the deck of a boat.)

Cue the theme music

(Intro scenes)

(Explosions!)

(Duels)

(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)

(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)

(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)

(Big Explosion)

**YUGIOH,**

**ENTER THE STONER'S REALM**

* * *

(Boat 30: Speedboat dock)

"My Goblin attack force is useless this turn so I'll summon another."

2100

The goblins charged out of the new card as it flickered to life;

"Now I'll activate my field magic card meadow of heavenly escape any card that gets sent to the graveyard, even used magic cards are now removed from play."

Above them the clouds turned white again and created a spiral, through the centre of which shone a beam of light, illuminating the purple clouds of the fake shadow realm below.

"Now Attack Mournful Bob!!"

The goblins swarmed the crying knights and cut its head off, the headless knight flew up the shaft of light into the swirling white clouds above. Vengeful Bob's sword grew as his muscles rippled across his chest under the armour which also grew to encompass his new size, and the flames around Tanto grew.

Miswim cried out as the box she was in suddenly jerked and was lowered by a winch, the chain paying out from the ceiling as the box swung around, she took terrified gulps of air and found the marijuana smoke entering her lungs. Then just as suddenly as it had started, the winch stopped and the box was left swimming above the water, Miswim glanced across to a display box on the wall:

Miswim: 7000

Tanto : 8000

"I thought you were stronger than this Miswim, don't tell me that you have learnt nothing from your teacher?"

Miswim remembered;

* * *

(Flashback)

Back at the Shibousha Shourei inn, a regular had often played duel monsters against the other clientele for drinks, Miswim became impressed with the skill he demonstrated, time after time, winning against unfathomable odds, and adopted his gothic lifestyle as her own.

The week before the duellist kingdom tournament began; Miswim waited for him in the bar and persuaded him to teach her all he knew about duel monsters. In order to get her cards, as she was given no allowance by her parents, and because her father hated the game, Miswim had to steal money from the till and give it to the man who had promised to become her teacher.

After weeks of hard work, her sensei entered her into the battle city tournament in which she lost to Mai's sneaky fortune telling trick, ruining her self esteem, and when she arrived home, the man never visited the pub again.

All she has left to remember him buy are the cards he gave her before her first tournament; her destiny board cards and her 'Bob' warriors, he never even told her his name.

* * *

(Present: Boat 30: speedboat dock.)

Miswim felt anger building up in her, with her lips almost sealed shut she whispered through her microphone in her eyepiece:

"How did you know about sensei?"

Tanto smirked.

"How long have you been manipulating my life?"

Tanto's smile relaxed.

"We have not been manipulating anything. We just have a lot of background information on you."

"Is Sensei here? On one of these boats?"

"No, your '_sensei_' eluded our grasp, it was meant for him to duel you, but he would not be found, he disappeared when this tournament was being planned."

"So you meant for me to have to go through this?"

Miswim was seething with anger, only the plastic cage protected Tanto from her wrath, his smile fell off his face, which moulded into a shape of wistful regret.

"I never meant any of this, but in order to defeat the sadists that control this tournament, we must infiltrate them at every level, do not worry, you have friends here."

At this Miswim's heart fluttered, they won't let me die!

"So what you're saying is that you are going to let me win?"

Tanto's face hardened again.

"No, I can not let you win, cameras are watching my hand, and besides if you do not beat me then there is nothing we can do without giving away our position."

Miswim stood up from where she had fallen to her feet.

"Fine."

She whipped a card from her deck into her hand and looked at them.

"You have let my Vengeful Bob get very powerful, and for that I thank you."

"What are you talking about? Reflect and refrain prevents him from attacking for another 2 turns."

"True, but I activate mystical space typhoon to destroy your trap!"

A small typhoon swept up the goblins into Tanto's graveyard.

"And then I sacrifice my Friendly Bob to summon Summoned skull!"

Friendly Bob collapsed into shards as a card appeared, out of which climbed a cloaked skeleton, Vengeful Bob's armour burst off him, and underneath was steel-like skin, covered with bulging muscles, he swung his sword around his head and shouted at Tanto, whose flaming deck master grew.

2500

"That's an impressive monster."

"Why thank you, now I use Raigeki to cleanse your field of monsters."

A lightning bolt thundered down onto each goblin attack force, the fire around Tanto grew again with each death.

"Now Vengeful Bob!!! ATTACK!!!!!!"

Vengeful Bob charged forward and slammed his sword through Tanto's chest, but as Bob was a hologram. Tanto inhaled a lot of smoke from his duel disc while his life points dropped for a second or to he staggered and almost fell over backwards, getting saved at the last minute by a weak scaly fiend reaching out of the fire around him to catch him before he hit the floor. The creature turned around looked at vengeful Bob, glared and pointed his finger.

Vengeful Bob exploded into thousands of shards which were sucked into the fires around tanto's feet.

The flames grew bigger.

5450

Miswim stared at Tanto dumbstruck;

"What? My monster attacked you directly, how did he die and what?......."

Miswim sighed.

"Deck master, right?"

"Yep."

His deck master pushed him to his feet.

"Any monster that attacks me directly gets removed from play after the attack and I only lose half of his attack points from my life points, rather than the full amount."

He took a breath and looked Miswim in the face.

"So if you want to attack with summoned skull...."

Well at least we didn't summon Anubis Noir to attack with.

"I'll place one card face down thank you."

Tanto drew, just what he needed to finish the game.

Fuck, Miswim can't defeat this, oh well, she played a good duel.

"Miswim, you have been a worthy adversary, but you can not defeat my next combo, first I summon one monster face down, then I lay down two cards on the field."

His hand was empty.

"Your move Miswim, do what you will, you can not defeat me!"

"Scary move, ok, I activate Harpies feather duster."

A large feathery wing swept along Tanto's magic card field, but as soon as it touched the first face down card another wing flew from it and knocked the feather duster onto Miswim's field destroying all her magic cards.

"Gryphon Wing."

"Grrr."

Miswim growled under her breath.

"Fine, I'll summon Queens double and attack your life points directly."

As the double of the queen attacked Tanto it too exploded and got sucked into the flames around him.

5275

"Well lovely last ditch attempt, while your pitiful monster attacked me I activated the trap card last orders, forcing us to construct a new deck of 3 cards from any cards we have in our deck or the graveyard, and the rest, thanks to my field magic card, are removed from play."

As Miswim sorted through her cards for the 3 she thought she'd need, a thought crossed into her mind.

He probably has a well defined strategy, all these cards going out of play is worrying me a bit, and my deck is to small to use my..... wait... I have it.

Miswim took 3 cards from her deck and put the rest back in her deck box, Tanto did the same. The flames around him obscured his body and most of his face, apart from one eye and a patch of skin round it.

This has to work, I feel it.

Then another thought ran through her head and she gulped.

If it doesn't... You're dead.

"Ok, Tanto, you're going down, I only need 3 cards to wipe you out, and look, there they are in my deck. Your turn, good luck."

Tanto stared across at Miswim, she was acting brave but he could see her shaking,

Well at least they're giving me a lot of money for this.

Tanto drew his first card.

"First of all I activate Raigeki."

Miswims monsters were destroyed by blasts of lightning.

And the cause will be furthered, remember the cause.

"Miswim, I am deeply sorry, for you are about to lose the duel. For I summon my deck master Gren Maju De Enza to the field."

The flames followed a path into the centre of the space between Miswim and Tanto.

You were right.

"Please forgive me Miswim, my monster gains 400 attack points for each monster removed from play, and since our decks have both been removed his attack power is...."

But Miswim was ahead of him as she stared into the beauty of the flames.

"Over 40000."

Well.... At least he's sorry.

"That's right. Now my monster, attack Miswim directly."

Tanto turned away unable to watch.

Out of the flames burst an enormous fiery red dragon, the scaly fiend had grown with the power it absorbed, and now it was unstoppable. It flew into the air, circled and dived towards Miswim hanging in her box, it opened its mouth. Miswim could see brightly coloured gasses coming out of various glands in the dragon's mouth, everything seemed to slow down. As the red gas connected with the mustard yellow gas the air sparked, the green and the blue gasses seemed to lazily drift into the spark and catch fire, the gasses forming a massive ball of flame that inched its way out of the dragons mouth towards her.

* * *

(l-space)

What willl happen next, if you want Miswim to die a horrible death put the number '1' at the top of your review.

If you wish for Yugi to save her press '2'

If you wish for Ryou to save her press '3'

If you wish for Behkurah to save her press '4'

If you wish for Kaiba to save her press '5'

If you wish for Mokuba to save her press '6'

If you wish for Marik to save her press '7'

If you wish for Joey to save her press '8'

Or if you want Yami to save her while controlling Edd's body press 9

Remember, the next chapter goes out tomorrow, so make your choices now.

Disappears in a puff of smoke

(there is blackness all around you, except for......

A bright blue button marked review looms out of the foreground, you feel an irresistible urge to click it.)


	32. Dice V Machines

(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard)

I do not own yugioh, or Garth Merengi's darkplace,

Oh and {} now signifies thought as kept cutting out the hash's.

I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor.

You are about to enter the world of my imagination;

You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'

(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him, the screen follows the paper as it falls down to the deck of a boat.)

Cue the theme music

(Intro scenes)

(Explosions!)

(Duels)

(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)

(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)

(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)

(Big Explosion)

YUGIOH,

ENTER THE STONER'S REALM

* * *

(Boat 3)

"I'll go first Duke!"

Tristan pulled a new card from his deck

"Fine, going second's better because you can attack straight away."

Tristan looked at the cards in his hand.

{Okay, Yugi's always saying follow the heart of the cards, so I'll pick one card at random and the heart of the cards will guide me.}

Tristan shut his eyes and melodramatically pulled 1 card from his hand and laid it on the duel disc in defensive position, the card shimmered into being on the field as tendrils of the shadow fog drifted around the duellists.

"Your move chump."

"This'll be easier than I thought, you didn't even see what you summoned, I mean, come on, I'll summon goblin attack force and destroy that card."

Goblins charged out of Duke's holographic card and sliced up the piece of cardboard on Tristan's side of the field, kuriboh evaporated with a slight cry of 'Kurrriiiiiiiiii'

Duke burst out laughing;

"God, you're stupid, Kuriboh's only good in the hand or with multiply. I'm surprised that Yugi isn't here, stopping you from making those stupid mistakes."

The goblins sheathed their swords and pulled out their shields, forming a tortoise.

"Now your move, lets see if you can recover."

Tristan smiled to himself, he actually had a plan, he'd deliberately summoned Kuriboh to let Duke think he hadn't learnt anything, {Now time to move this plan into action.}

"Ok Duke, I'll give it my best shot."

He drew.

"Okay, now this may go a little to quickly for you, so play close attention, first I activate dark hole to destroy your monster, now , from my hand, I offer Alpha the magnet warrior, beta, and gamma as a tribute to summon Valkyron the magna warrior "

A black hole sprang out of nothingness, and duke watched as his monster was sucked closer and closer to the edge and then, suddenly, it disappeared.

3 cards appeared, and from each, robot parts flew, as more came out, more and more connected until they formed a mighty robot.

A3500

D3850

"Now, attack!!"

The warrior threw his sword, which spun brilliantly through the air before smashing into Duke's chest, and then the steely warrior extended his hand towards Duke and the dice master watched in amazement as the blade quivered. The warrior stretched out his finger tips until they were as far apart as they could be, and then, without warning the sword shot back into his outstretched fingers, while Duke choked on the smoke pouring into his lungs.

Duke: 4000

Tristan: 8000

"I'll put one card face down, your turn dice boy."

When Tristan ended his turn a hole appeared in the air, it changed shape until it had formed a distinctive outline, then it filled with colour and a goblin attack force dropped out of the sky.

"Using strike ninja's special ability, I paid 500 life points to transport my attack force to another dimension till the end of your turn."

Duke flipped a card out of his deck.

"How's that s'posed to help? You just lost more life points."

"Ah no, for I activate the book of Taiyou to switch him into attack mode, then I sacrifice him to summon Dark scorpion: Gorg the strong"

A scorpion-like monster appeared and devoured the goblins.

A1800

D1500

"How's that supposed to beat Valkyron?"

"Watch and learn, my friend, all I need to do is attach power of the spirit, and megamorph to my monster."

Gorg grew dounble its original size, and started to fade slightly out of view until it was see-through.

"Now attack Tristan!!"

The scorpion lashed its tail out, the rock monster raised its sword to block.... To no avail, the tail went through the monster and into Tristan, knocking him to the ground, where he sat for a second, breathing the hallucinogenic smoke.

T: 4400

D: 4000

Valkyron just froze, Tristan got to his feet and walked, rather unsteadily, around the monster, it looked like a card board cut out, Valkyron had no depth any more, then a gust of wind knocked it backwards, and rising up from the floor to meet it, was its card.

The monster fell onto the holographic card, and attached itself, then, both disappeared, Tristan looked at his duel disc, not surprisingly; the disc had removed the card from the field also.

"Gorg can banish 1 monster every time he damages lifepoints, and my power of spirit card let him attack you directly, of course, you can do the same thing next turn, but then owing to Gorg's effect, I know what card you're getting next, and believe me, it sucks."

Tristan looked at his lack of a hand; he had spent it all in summoning valkyron, now only his face down card could help him.

"I end my turn Tristan, do your worst."

Suspecting fowl play, (he thought Duke was being a headless chicken) Tirstan picked up his next card, and to his horror, it was valkyron the magna warrior.

"Gorg sends 1 monster on the field to the top of your deck, without your 3 magnet warriors, Valkyron just clogs up your deck."

Tristan just said nothing.

"I'm guessing you'll pass this turn?"

The brown-haired teen just nodded.

"Ok, well, I draw, obviously, and look, because you still have more life points than me, Gorg is still all powerful, so I'll just attack you again!"

The scorpion lashed out its tail, knocking Tristan onto his arse again.

T: 0800

D: 4000

The shadow scorpion started to shrink until it was no bigger than a sand scorpion, you'd find in the desert.

A0900

"Now I know that'll finish you off next turn, but you could summon a monster, and I want to get to the swimming pool before the speech, so I'm going to sacrifice Gorg the strong to summon summoned skull, oh and you lost the top card from your deck. Your move."

Gorg swelled back to normal size, a couple of lumps started to grow on its back, before they broke open, and a skeleton climbed out of the carcass.

Tristan pondered his position, Duke's last attack had indeed sent a monster to the graveyard from the top of his deck, before picking up his next card he decided to consider a strategy with his 1 card on the field, when all of a sudden he thought he saw a giant banana in the fog;

_Trust in me, trust in the mythical purple banana!!!!_

The banana was indeed purple, and he wasn't sure if it was real, but trusting the heart of the cards hadn't worked, so he might as well trust a figment of his imagination.

"Ok, Mr. Bannana, this is for you."

If it could, the banana would have sweat dropped.

Tristan snapped a card out of his deck and played it in the magic slot the second he saw what it was:

A grinning pot appeared on the field, and burst, sending two holographic cards towards Tristan at the same time he drew them from his deck.

"Ok Duke, you're going down, first I activate the face down card I've been sitting on for ages, Black luster Ritual! I sacrifice Valkyron to summon Black Luster Soldier!!!!"

The rock monster fell into the pot that had appeared, moments before it metamorphisised into a heavily armoured warrior.

"Nice move, but you need to do more than just that to defeat me."

"Don't count your chickens just yet, I have just 1 more card, and it's all I need!"

"Really? Even if you magically destroyed my monster, you can't take out all my life points in one attack, I have Raigeki in my hand, once you have no monsters left any monster of mine can wipe you out. You and Yugi are finished Tristan, I'm sorry for the king of games, but without him in the tourney someone else can finally win."

"Don't count your chickens Duke, the mythical purple banana is on my side."

"What?"

Tristan realised what he'd just said as the banana slapped himself with a pizza slice.

{mmmmmm... food.)

"This is the rarest card I own, Serenity gave it to me after battle city and told me that it would help me build a strong deck, I activate Vampiric Sustenance!!"

"What? I've never heard of that one!"

Duke sweat dropped a second,

"Did you make it up? Cos the duel discs can detect fake cards."

"Of course I didn't make it up!!! Watch for yourself!!"

Tristan slotted his card into the magic slot beneath Yugi's monster and activated it.

Suddenly, without warning, the luster soldier grabbed the summoned skull and sank his teeth into its neck, the skeleton evaporated and the ritual monster grew stronger,

A4750

This card destroys your monster and transfers half its attack points to mine, now Black Luster Soldier, attack Duke!!!"

The knight swung its sword at Duke's neck, and as it connected, a hologram of the dicemaster's head fell onto the floor and rolled around his feet.

"Duke, I want no card from you, except a promise to let me and Serenity be happy."

"Dude, you haven't even asked her out yet."

"I'm getting around to it!! Just.!.!.!....."

"Tristan, she's yours, you beat me fair and square. I'm relieved actually, I'm releasing a new set of dungeon dice monsters, and I have to oversee the whole thing, so now I've got some spare time."

The dicemaster straightened up, and fell over into a deep sleep.

"Wow, someone can't handle there smoke."

Remarked a passing boy with long brown hair.

* * *

(wow, shiny review button)


	33. Round 2

Imagine a place, parallel to a dimension.

The sort of place you might find a weird mirror or a spooky door.

My friend, you have just entered.....

The stoner's realm.....

* * *

(Intro scenes)

(Explosions!)

(Duels)

(A cook Juggling with two knives)

(The Winged Dragon Of Ra, and Slyther the sky dragon flying together towards a boat.)

(Kaiba pointing at Obelisk the Tormentor)

(Big Explosion)

YUGIOH,

ENTER THE STONER'S REALM

* * *

(Boat 1)

"Congratulationsch to everybody who made it thisch far, welcome to round 2, the duel dischk boothch are open again, but thich time, they are giving cardch to each of you, and taking your duel diskch, do not worry, round 2 will be conducted on the island in front of uch, ushing the shlightly old fashioned arenash. Nobody will get any field bonuchech though, now I am going to preshent the firsht conteshtants to get to round 2 with their new cardch, let me welcome Mokuba, and Sheto Kaiba."

The brother went up to the platform to speak with the announcer.

"Sheto, for your kinship with the blue eyech white dragon, you get the dragon armour magic card."

He handed over the card in a plastic wallet.

"It addch 1000 attack pointsh to the blue eyesh white dragon."

"Thank you, but I could just as easily use an axe of despair."

"Ah yesh,"

Said the middle aged announcer.

"For now, perhapsh, but after each duel, the card which you are given now, will have more and more powerch unlocked, until by the end of the tournament, it will have all itsh powerch, do not trade your new cardsh my friend, becaush only the pershon who hash won it, by getting thish far, will be able to unlock itsh hidden powersh. Oh, and shome of you will not have powersh unlocked on your card, but get other cardsh that nobody hashe ever sheen before."

Seto stood down and allowed the silver haired man give his brother his prize.

"Mokuba Kaiba, you have the monshter card baby blue eyesh, it ish only a level 3 monshter, right now, but it will grow far more powerful than you can imagchine, itch attack and defence power are both 1500, and it currently hach the effect that any blue eyesh white dragonsh on the field gain an exchtra 500 attack and defence points for it being there, and it gainsh 1000 attack and defence pointsh for any blue eyesh white dragonsh that are on the field."

The Kaiba brothers graciously accepted their cards, bowed to the applause, and made there way down the steps of the podium.

* * *

(Under boat 30)

A swarm of Kuribohs appeared around Miswim shielding her from the fireball.

"That all you got?"

"I end my turn Miswim."

Miswim snapped her hand down to her deck, it didn't matter what she drew now, she'd won anyway, might as well do it with style.

"Alright Tanto Shino, I activate my deck master's special effect. Seal Of Anubis!"

The jackal jumped over Miswim's head, towards the flaming dragon, every attempt to catch it was made in vain as the jackal dodged with supernatural speed, when the dragons head was turned Anubis Noir inscribed a sigil on its chest before the Gren Maju De Enza knocked it back.

With cat like skill Anubis Noir turned in mid air and landed on all four feet. It flicked a claw in the air and Tanto's deck master exploded.

"I win; I'm back in the tournament! Yes, yes yes, thank you!!"

Miswim danced around in her plastic cage, revelling in the suddenly sweet smell of cannabis as it wafted from her duel disc, as soon as the door opened, she hugged her opponent.

"Not quite yet, I'm afraid."

Miswim stood back, her eyes wide open.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, that you've made it to round 2."

Miswim stared into Tanto's eyes;

"What do you mean?"

"Round 2 of this parallel tournament."

"So I still have to risk my life for this stupid game!?"

Miswim shouted in his face.

"You only have 2 more duels till you rejoin the tournament in round 3"

"Oh, two more, aren't I lucky, Jesus Christ, I'm risking my fucking life here!!"

"You get one card out of my deck."

Tanto Shino carried on doggedly, while his mouth gave Miswim the memorised speech, his eyes carried great regret

"Well doesn't that make me the happiest woman ever!?! Is there anying thing else?"

"Yes, I am also proud to give you your prize for making it to round 2, it is a very powerful monster and twin to that in your deck."

Miswim paused and looked into his eyes, Tanto was being sincere;

"What do you mean? What in my deck?"

"Anubis Rein, the lighter side of your monster."

Tanto pressed Miswim's hand against the hand print on the machine next to him, while his left hand went for the other reader.

"Miswim Yamitoshi?"

"Yes?"

With this the machine ejected a yellow monster card.

It had 9 stars, and the picture was an enormous silver haired jackal, its coat shimmered in the holofoil, the descriptive passage read, the lighter half of a pair of twins, separated at birth. It had an attack of 3000 and a defence of 3200, and at the top was the words Anubis Rein, in gold lettering.

"Its great, thank you."

Tanto looked around him, hurriedly, before blocking Miswim up against the wall.

"What are you doing?"

"Shuffle through my deck, look like you're picking out a card."

"What?"

"Do it!"

Miswim complied, puzzled, Tanto ran a hand through his hair.

"Okay, I'm not allowed to tell you this, they are filming this, but no microphones, they can't read my lips like this and I don't want them to get suspicious."

"Ok..."

"I need to talk fast, someone could be here any minute, either of your 2 monsters can use the Anubis seal, but their real power comes from fusing them. Good luck, and don't trust the tournament officials, there are a few in the organization that are with me, just trust no-one, duel your heart out, and I'll see you in round 4."

"Tanto? What are you doing?"

Tanto straightened up as another official came down the stairs.

"Nothing Jim, I'm just waiting for this bitch to pick one of my cards."

"Watch the language in front of the lady, Shino."

"Yes sir."

"You see anything you like there Miswim?"

"Ah, yes, Jim was it? I'd like this confused knight please."

"Ah yes, one of Tanto's finer cards, keep it, ok Tanto, you have to give her a speedboat ride to the next duel, can you do that?"

Tanto nodded in the affirmative while he sent a scowl of pure hate at Jim, though it could have been interpreted as going for Miswim.

"Good, Miswim, I'll see you at the next duel. Have fun!"

The two boarded a speed boat that was lowered down to the water.

"You played really well, and enjoy the confused knight."

"Thanks."

The cargo bay doors opened, and Tanto fired the engine, speeding them off towards the island, Miswim noticed a volcano in the background of the lovely picturesque island.

* * *

(Boat 1)

A speed boat sped off in the distance, Yugi turned back to the announcer who was finishing his speech:

"....Knockout, it isch every duellischts buschiness to fight 2 duelsch, your headschetsch will record your victoriesch and lossches, if you loshe both gamesch you will be kicked out, if you only win one you will be thruscht into a chide game, in which you will duel the resht of the people who only have 1 victory, and the top 5 will join the resht of you again in round 4. That'sh about it, any queschtionsh?"

No one had any; the English announcer had a knack for answering all the questions in his speech.

Tea giggled to Yugi, no longer enthralled by the speech.

"I wonder who he is, that guy reminds me of someone, with his slight lisp and British accent and his suave....."

"Okay Tea, I'm going to go speak to Bakura, ok?"

"That's exactly what Joey said."

"Fine, I'll go speak to Mokuba."

"Kaiba's with him."

"Is there anyone on this boat I know who's not with someone I'm not talking to?"

"There is Edd, or Sora."

Yugi remembered the last time he'd talked to the Australian.

"I'll go talk to Edd."

Yugi pushed himself through the crowd, he was in a good mood having been told by Tristan about the victory over Duke, he was sure to find the millennium puzzle in round 2.

"So Edd, what do you think these new cards will be like?"

"I've already got mine; I spoke to one of the stall guys before the speech, just as they were setting up."

Yugi eyed the throng of people round the booth. He decided not to take a chance.

"Can I see it?"

"Sure."

Edd reached into his pocket and pulled his deck out of a box; he pulled off the top card and gave it to Yugi.

"Bovizard, 3 stars, 300 attk 300 def; Flip: takes control of attacking monster, or if flipped in controllers turn, can take control of any monster on opponent's side of field by turning into an equip magic card. Wow, impressive."

"I know, I've already thought of a million uses."

The creature in the picture had a small, box-like shape, tapering out to a pointed tail; it had two prehensile feet, cute googly eyes in the front of the square head and fur draped over its body.

"Looks kinda cute don't it?"

"Don't underestimate cute, Kuriboh's saved me many a time."

"Me too, the cutest ones are the deadliest, you don't expect anything."

"'Cool'"

Edd almost fell over laughing. Yugi was one of those guys who you never expect to here the word cool from, he even inserted the quotation marks.

After Edd had calmed down Yugi helped him up.

"So, did you just finish a duel?"

"What? No, me and me mates had a couple of celebratory joints, now they've gone missing, and I can't find them anywhere, oh well, I've got you to talk to."

"'Rad'"

Edd fell over again; he couldn't believe any one would ever say Rad.

He calmed down and stood up;

"So what you been up to?"

"Oh, I qualified, that's about it really."

"Ah well."

Edd caught sight of Ollie standing talking to summon blonde haired boy.

"Look I gota go, me and me mates are getting stoned in our cabin, come join us when you get your new card."

"Ok... I...."

But Edd was gone.

* * *

(Edd's cabin, 3 hours later)

The room was a mess on the table lay two bright green weed grinders and a bag full of diesel haze. Tobacco covered every surface and Ollie lay on his bed smoking a bright orange bong, his long black hair catching fire every time he tried to relight it.

Rob rolled over on his bed to try and find his zippo when something jabbed him in the ribs.

"Hey what's this?"

From underneath him he dragged an upside down pyramid on a chain, covered in Egyptian writing.

"Bad luck, remember that double duel we played, Mathew Perriwinkle, the guy I won it off, and Miswim Yamitoshi, his partner, have both disappeared, they were who I defeated to get the puzzle."

"They could have been..."

"No one else who failed to qualify has left yet."

"Wow, trippy."

"Yeah."

Ollie looked at it for a couple of seconds.

"Looks like some sort of puzzle."

He put it down on the table.

"I say we hide it, break it up into its pieces then whoever's looking for it won't find us with it, and therefore we don't disappear."

"Mih, if you're that paranoid, chuck it in the sea. I say we don't though, cos that kid Yugi was wearing it the other day and he aint disappeared yet."

Edd picked up the object and slid it into his rucksack, before kicking it under his bed.

"I'll ask him in the morning."

At this moment a figure walked through the door

"Hi.... Who are you?"

Edd looked at the intruder, he was about 7 feet tall, wearing a big black cloak, and carrying a scythe.

YOU CAN CALL ME BOB.

"Oh...ok...."

DO YOU WANT TO GET STONED DUDES? I HAVE DOOBY SNACKS!!!

Said Bob unerolling a plastic bag with some pre-rolleds in.

He sat on the bed, his back against the wall, next to Ollie.

SO YOU GUYS SEEN A PUZZLE IT'S KINDA SHAPED LIKE A PYRAMID

Mentioned Bob as he passed around his pre-rolled joints.

INS ON A CHAIN...

"Nope, sorry, erm... I think I saw that white-haired kid with it though, what was his name? Bakura?"

OH, RIGHT, OK

Bob relaxed, Edd could see his rib cage through the cloak.

* * *

(Boat 1)

"Way to go Mokuba,"

"Thanks Big brother, I knew we'd get through."

"Yes, but it still puzzles me, why did those 2 attack us? Who were their bosses?"

"Well its confusing, yeah, but I don't think it'll be a big deal, if they come after us again, we'll just whoop their asses, are you with me big brother?"

Mokuba raised his hand for a high five, Seto joined in, then a thought struck him.

"Mokuba, you seem unusually..... I don't know, I can't quite put my finger on it. Did you have another duel recently?"

"Nope, but I went and got stoned with that hot chick over there."

Mokuba thumbed behind him.

"It was fun."

* * *

(Edd's cabin, an hour later)

I CAN'T MOVE, OH DEITY OF MY CHOICE THIS IS FUN.

Edd laughed, the diesel haze was having its usual effect, Bob couldn't move an inch of his body and was complaining that his mind was going to fast.

"I think Steven Hawking has arrived."

Edd looked at Ollie and Bob, Bob had taken his hood down and was sitting there grinning in his skull like face.

"I have an idea, Bob, can Ollie borrow your robe? We have some spare trousers and a t-shirt you can borrow, Ollie's about your height."

SURE, WHY NOT?

10 minutes later Bob came back into the room wearing jeans and a t-shirt, though he seemed to be having a few problems.

HAHAHA, I'M HAVING A FEW PROBLEMS WITH THESE, FOR ONE THING, I HAVE NO ARSE.

Indeed the jeans where very loose on him.

I AM MINUS 1 ARSE

Then Death walked into the room, his cold skeletal hands holding the scythe, under the hood a grinning skull could be made out.

"I have come to take your souls!!!"

Rob, Bob and Edd fell over laughing, Ollie looked more like Death, than Death himself ever had.

DEITY OF MY CHOICE, THAT IS SO FUNNY!!!

A large egg timer inside the robe started buzzing.

OH FUCK, I HAVE TO GO TO WORK.

Bob clicked his fingers and him and Ollie were wearing the right clothes again.

SEE YOU GUYS TOMMOROW.

He then ran through the door.

Edd sat down, and then pondered a question for a couple of seconds.

"When that dude came in.... and when he went out... did he open the door?"

(Elsewhere on boat 1)

"Joey have you got Yugi's puzzle back yet?"

"No, I have not, I can't find it anywhere, hey wait-a-minute, Behkurah, I know that's you, you're not getting it, I'd chuck you in the sea."

Ryou sighed;

"Don't worry Joey it's me, Ryou, Behkurah's in our room with the millennium ring, trying to contact Marik and Ishizu, somebody's after the millennium items again, and it isn't him, it's something else, something more sinister."

"Something more sinister than that creep?"

"Yes, Death."

* * *

I do not own yugioh, Cheech & Chong, Death, that American, or the British announcer

(You are stranded in l-space, a gleaming blue button shines in front of you, yes, it's your only escape, it is the review button)


	34. The Mafia never forgets

AN; I know its been an eternity, sorry bout that, but I kinda got distracted by ooooooooooooh shiny button.

Anyway, here's the next happy chappie, enjoy.

Disclamer; I own nothing in this story, I stole it all I say, it all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

* * *

Imagine a place, parallel to a dimension.

The sort of place you might find a weird mirror or a spooky door.

My friend, you have just entered.....

The stoner's realm.....

(Intro scenes)

(Explosions!)

(Duels)

(A cook Juggling with two knives)

(The Winged Dragon Of Ra, and Slyther the sky dragon flying together towards a boat.)

(Kaiba pointing at Obelisk the Tormentor)

(Big Explosion)

**YUGIOH,**

**ENTER THE STONER'S REALM**

* * *

The sun glittered off the water as half of the cruise boats turned around and headed back towards Japan, the rest steamed on towards America. An albatross flew into the sky as the back of one of the boats opened up, and out came 3 speedboats, which sped around to the side of the boat, where duelists began loading themselves into them, ready for the next phase of the tournament, leaving just 7 duelists on the boat.

* * *

(Bakura's room)

Behkurah put down the phone, and lay down on the bed, the millennium ring providing him with a semi-corporeal body while he worked. Marik wasn't answering his mobile, and neither was Ishizu, tired with the effort of maintaining a body, Behkurah faded back into the ring.

Ryou ran into the room, "Behkurah, where are you? Listen stop pining over that stupid bitch and get your act together, we have to get to the next round!"

The millennium ring hovered in the air and lit up, projecting an image of Ryou Bakura's ascendant holding up one finger pointed at the brit;

"Listen you stupid British pansy I….."

Ryou just laughed,

"Come on, we've got to get some points or we wont qualify, and most finalists have left for the next round! Look, we entered separately, but I'll transfer my points to you so that we can get in sooner."

He called up his points score on his eyepiece; "Disk, transfer all my points to duellist Behkurah."

In his ear, a voice replyed; "Thank you, you have ZERO points, thank you for entering the tournament and have a pleasant trip home."

Ryou slipped the ring around his neck and flashed the porthole as Behkurah took over his body.

"Let's go kick some tournament ass."

* * *

(1 duel and a humiliating defeat later. Deck of boat1, somewhere in the shadow realm)

Bakura (as he was in Ryou's body) laughed;

"Easy victory, I don't know how you lasted this long boy, but now its time for you to pay a visit to the shadow realm."

The millennium eye lit up on his forehead an unseen wind blew his hair into the air and Brodie said; "But I don't want to go to the shadow realm!"

Bakura's hair dropped onto his face, and the millennium eye disappeared.

"What do you mean don't want to go?"

Brodie looked at him said; "I don't have any friends there."

The shock made Bakura lose control and the fog around them disappeared; "Oh well in that case………"

With a blinding flash of light Brodie disappeared.

"…I'll just have to go defeat some of your friends."

Bakura walked over to the waiting motorboat to go to the tropical island where all the other duellists were waiting.

* * *

Across two boats, where the remaining duellists were buying lunch, a tannoy blared out;

THERE ARE ONLY TWO SLOTS AND 4 DUELLISTS LEFT, IF THE DUELS ARE NOT FOUGT BY THE TIME WE LEAVE MOTORBOAT RANGE, THEN THE LUCKY ENTRANTS WILL BE PICKED OUT OF A HAT AND CHOPPERED ACROSS TO THE ISLAND, THOUGH IF THIS HAPPENS, YOU WILL COUNT AS IF YOU HAVE ALREADY LOST A DUEL IN ROUND 2 AND NOT GET ANY PIXIE STICKS IN THEIR KNAPSACKS!

* * *

(boat 2)

Derek dropped his burger

Oh shit, if we don't duel now, we could get kicked out of the tourney, we have to find one of those other duellists.

As if on cue, a large burly man holding what could only be a duel disk stepped out from behind a bamboo pole an dwalked nonchalantly past Derek, waving the disk in front of his eyes.

"You there!" Derek shouted.

"Duel me and the winner will go to round 2."

The man turned around.

"So youse wanna duel me? Lets get dis on!"

The Italian held out his rectangular duel disk and what appeared to be a pack of cards came out and spread like a fan, in the midst of the cards were platforms for duel-monster cards, the fake black smog of the stoner/shadow realm poured out of the empty packet as he prepared to duel.

Derek's snake disk snapped open,

"So pardner" Derek drawled, "You want we should use deckmasters then?"

"Ok, but I getta go first."

"No praw. What's Ya name?"

"My name is'a Vincienzo."

Derek summoned a Lord of Dragons as his deck master and watched a large gold coin raise up from the ground under Vincienzo's feet.

"Nice'a deck master boy, but it'll take a lot'a more than that to defeat Don Vincienzo."

* * *

(L-space)

Duh-dah

Duh-dah

Duh-dah-duh-dah-Duh-DAh-DUh-DAh- DUH-DAH

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

A blue shiny button appears from nowhere, marked review.


	35. Battle of the blueeyes

Thank god i'm finnally finished with this round onto the beautiful sunny shores of the island, after this duel.

Disclamer; I own nothing in this story, I stole it all I say, it all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

* * *

Imagine a place, parallel to a dimension.

The sort of place you might find a weird mirror or a spooky door.

My friend, you have just entered.....

The stoner's realm.....

(Intro scenes)

(Explosions!)

(Duels)

(A cook Juggling with two knives)

(The Winged Dragon Of Ra, and Slyther the sky dragon flying together towards a boat.)

(Kaiba pointing at Obelisk the Tormentor)

(Big Explosion)

**YUGIOH,**

**ENTER THE STONER'S REALM**

The sun glistened off a porthole on the side of boat 1, a fish jumped out of the water and fell back in, sharks circled the boat waiting for another tasty treat to be thrown in, and on deck 2 people were duelling.

"You challenged me, so I go first."

Vincienzo drew his cards and placed one trap card face down.

"Your move."

"Ha, you're not even defending yourself, I summon spear dragon in attack mode, attack Vincienzo directly!"

The Italian held out his hand; "Don't be so hasty, I activate the trap card gravity bind. Nothing with more than 3 stars may attack."

The field shimmered blue and gridlines appeared everywhere, pinning the spear dragon to the ground.

Derek grumbled under his breath then placed a trap card onto the field also. "Your move."

Vincienzo straightened his tie and adjusted the line of his suit.

"No great schemes then? I'll place another card face down and end my turn."

Puzzled, Derek drew another card

_This is just what I need, I'll have to wait to use it, spear dragon's not powerful enough and this is an easy way to get around that gravity bind._

Derek laid a monster card face down.

"I have a card that can beat you Vincienzo, and I can wait, my whole deck is full of different strategies. And what ever you summon can't touch my life points."

"Funny thing."

The Italian drew another card.

"So is mine, and you should never rely too heavily on monsters."

He laid a monster card on his duel disk.

Sparks flew up from the holographic card, and a flaming lantern appeared.

"And please don't insult my intelligence again, Inaba attack!"

A ghostly rabbit appeared in the flames then dived out through the spear dragon and plunged into Derek's chest.

Derek Lp

#7300#

"Then I end my turn."

The rabbit jumped from the field into the gentleman's hand, pulling its card with it.

"I'm not one of these guys who explain every thing his card does, if you haven't seen it before, so you'll have to guess."

Derek drew a card then slid it into a trap slot.

The card shimmered onto the field.

"Another trap ey? Well your last one did you no good."

Vincienzo drew a card and placed another magic/trap card on the field, then he summoned his Inaba White Rabbit again."

"I think you know what happens next. Inaba attack!!"

The rabbit flew forward but just before it reached the Derek's spear dragon a suit of armour appeared encasing the little spirit and dragging it to the ground, where it exploded, showering the duellists with holographic goo.

Deek looked smug behind the trap card he'd raised; Sakuretsu Armor.

"Don't smile for too long, watch this American!"

As Vincienzo ended his turn, Inaba the White rabbit stuck its head out of his graveyard, and the disk ejected its card into the Mafia boss's waiting hand.

Derek just glowered and drew a card. "Finally, I activate remove trap and destroy your gravity bind."

"Now Spear dragon attack his life points directly.

Vincienzo flipped a switch on his duel disk and out of nowhere; a javelin flew, impaling the dragon.

Vincienzo Lp

#9900#

The dragon pulled the Enchanted Javelin out of its side, then dived into the don

Vincienzo Lp

#8000#

The Italian inhaled a big cloud of smoke.

"They're using good stuff here now."

The spear dragon settled back into place then raised its wings in a defensive stance.

"Not a bad move you just did, took out two of my traps."

Vincienzo drew again.

"Ah but I shall now stop you attacking with my swords of revealing light and bring my Inaba back."

The white rabbit appeared with its torch, and a swarm of swords appeared around Derek his defensive monster card flipped, revealing a dragon dwelling in the cave;

"Now Inaba attack!"

The rabbit jumped at Derek and smashed him round the head with the torch it was carrying.

Derek Lp

#6600#

Derek drew.

"If you're so good, why aren't you already on the island?"

The Italian laughed;

"I'm a businessman, I've won battle after battle, then I sold my points, there are some easy opponents in round 2. You have to adopt a strategy for who you play as well as how you duel, and it helps to make a bit of money. "

"I place one monster face down and end my turn."

"You can't win by defending."

Vincienzo flicked a card off the top of his deck, into his hand.

I summon Inaba The White rabbit and activate Mask of brutality!

Inaba The White rabbit Attk: #1700#

The ghost of the rabbit jumped out of the now ever present torch and pulled on a shaman's mask of brutality.

"Now attack!"

The rabbit dived into Derek's chest, and as he inhaled the vapours from the burning cannabis, he thought of a new plan.

Derek Lp

#4900#

Derek drew _not the card We need, but if it comes to me soon, We can use this to make it stronger than We realised. He must have very few monsters, so We can use our saved defence._

"I'll end my turn."

"Furry-muff,"

The Italian drew a card, then summoned his Inaba again.

"This must be very repetitive. Inaba, attack!!!!"

Again the rabbit swung itself off the torch at Derek, but this time, he activated his trap card and the rabbit was met with the strong power of a mirror force card. The waves of energy blasted the little rabbit out of the sky and it returned to Vincienzo's hand.

"I'll end my turn and since I have 7 cards in my hand, I'll discard one to the grave. Your move."

Derek drew.

_Yes, last turn of his swords of revealing light, hmm, not a great trap, but it should work with our combo, if only to do a little bit more damage._

"I place one card face down and end my turn."

As the card shimmered into place the barrier of swords disappeared.

Vincienzo drew and laughed at his card.

"Well, too late now, I activate monster reborn to bring back the card I discarded last turn Blue eyes White Dragon!!"

The card rose out of the ground, with a picture of a dragon looking majestic, then suddenly, it started to move inside the picture, then it broke free of its prison and grew as it fled its card.

"I'll use it to destroy your dragon dwelling in the cave first, Blue eyes!! Stinging tail attack!"

The enormous white dragon flew towards the green scaly dragon and hit it with its tail, knocking it far into the purple smog. Onlookers watched the hologram fall into the sea.

"Your move."

Derek concentrated on his deck, willing the card he wanted to be there to appear, if it didn't he was royally screwed. He shut his eyes and reached out for his deck, the seconds seemed to slow down to a walking pace and time almost fell to a standstill. His hand touched the edge of his deck and he slowly inched the card out of the holder.

With his eyes still closed he brought it up to his face and slowly lifted his eye lids. Then he noticed Vincienzo's face down card still on the field

_If that trap card is something good, then We'd have gambled all our cards away for nothing_

_But he'd still lose lp and we haven't taken any yet off him, it'd be a start._

_We'd have to rely on every card we got from our deck, but we wouldn't have lost, yet, that Inaba of his would take a while to whittle us down, and we'd just need a monster reborn of our own, plus if it was anything good he'd probably haveused it already.._

"I'll do it." Said Derek

"What?"

"I summon Maha Vailo in attack mode and switch my dark fire soldier and my spear dragon to attack mode, then I use fissure to destroy your blue-eyes."

AS the spellcaster gracefully climbed out of its card, a crack appeared below the blue-eyes white dragon, swallowing it whole.

_So far so good_

"Next I equip Maha Vailo with 2 dark pendants and a malevolent Nuzzler! Due to my spell caster's special ability on top of those bonuses it gets an extra 1500 attack points"

Maha Valio Attk: #4750#

"Now, all 3 of my monsters, attack Vincienzo directly!"

The spell caster swung its staff, the warrior swung its flaming sword, and the dragon flew towards its prey, magical, heat and physical attacks hit the Italian at the same time, forcing large quantities of smoke into his lungs.

Don Vincienzo Lp

#0650#

Derek Conklin Lp

#4900#

"You finished?"

Derek nodded.

Vincienzo drew.

At last, I can finally squash you like the bug you are. I activate Black Luster Ritual and because you reduced my life points I can finally use my megamorph I've had on the field all game!"

"I sacrifice 3 gradius options, and 2 Inabas to summon Black Luster Soldier!"

The monsters easch came to life as he slotted them in the graveyard before impaling themselves on the sword, the armour shook and suddenly grew into an enormous warrior.

Black Luster Soldier Attk: #3000#

"Now deck master add 50 of its attack power!"

The warrior grew.

Black Luster Soldier Attk: #4500#

"Activate Megamorph!"

The warrior doubled in size.

Black Luster Soldier Attk: #9000#

"Now attack the dark fire soldier and win me the match!!!!"

"Not so fast Mario, I activate the trap card needle ceiling!"

"What?"

The ceiling fell down on all the monsters on the field, sticking spikes through them all, as the black pendats were pierced they each exploded, sending energy waves at Vincienzo, causing him to inhale more smoke

Don Vincienzo Lp

#0000#

Derek Conklin !!WINNER!!

Vincienzo's face went white and he ripped off his gasmask, the illusory shadow realm fading away.

Derek took the italian's blue-eyes to add to his own collection, then ran to the waiting speedboat while the don threw up noisily behind him.

* * *

(L-space)

Nothing here apart from a big shiney blue button marked review, go on press it.


	36. Welcome to The island

Seto jumped off the boat as soon as it landed on the beach, he took a moment to breath in the fresh air of the island, before hauling Mokuba out of the boat.

"Come on, we have to find a duelling arena, then we can pick some targets for you to beat."

Mokuba looked down at his Italian loafers that his brother had bought him for Christmas.

"Uhm… Seto…."

Kaiba looked at his brother, Here it comes, prepare yourself.

Mokuba looked up and saw his brother's face set, his mouth formed a hard line, his eyes shrunk, it was his business face, Mokuba studied his shoes again.

"I'd rather… erm… pick my own duels… and… urgh… not have the…uhm… best duellist in the world breathing down my opponent's neck while we duel."

"It's ok Mokuba, I understand, I guess I'll see you in the 3rd round then."

Seto was all business but Mokuba knew it was tearing him apart underneath.

"Uhm… yeah guess so." Isn't he going to at least hang around until the other boats arrive?

"I guess… bye then." The older Kaiba turned around and haughtily marched into the wood.

Mokuba sat down, forlorn, all around him the other duellists raced into the wood, determined to take an advantage before the last boats arrived.

A motorboat sped towards a crowd of seagulls floating on the water;

"Hey man, gimme some fizzy jerks."

"Here you go."

Tristan passed the sweets to his blonde friend who emptied them into the palm of his hand.

"Any idea who's got Yugi's puzzle yet?"

"If I did they'd be dead so fast!..."

"Joey, anyone who has it, has probably recognised it, and sent that Goth chick to the shadow realm to get it."

"Whaddya saying?"

"I'm saying that perhaps you won't be able to clean up your own mistake this time."

As the boat passed close to the seagulls Joey lobbed his handful of sweets, the brightly coloured pellets flew into the air, where they were immediately grabbed by the scavenging seagulls.

"Aw not again Joey, you know this is going to delay your start time for the next round."

Half of the birds started to flap and propel themselves along the water

"They'll probably keep away from the boat. And are you calling me a bad duellist?"

Joey raised his fists half-heartedly, but Tristan couldn't see any anger in his eyes.

"Well you did lose to that Goth, but you also finished 3rd in battle city and second in duellist kingdom. I'm not calling you a bad duellist, but you've never beaten someone who had a millennium item and that's a fact, though Marik only beat ya 'cos he was a cheatin' bastard."

Joey opened his mouth to retaliate, but Tristan beat him to it; "I know you beat Yugi earlier, but you must no he let you win or u don't even have half the brains I give you credit for, and we all know blondes are stupid in the first place…."

Up above them, seagulls began to explode, each cried out a loud "SQUWARK!" before showering the boat with bloody goo.

Under her sunhat, Mai woke up.

"Not again! I thought you learned your lesson when I made you clean out my car with your toothbrush."

"I'll get a mop."

Joey slunk off, his shoulders drooped.

* * *

(North beach)

Yugi's boat pulled up on the shore and he jumped out, gone was his usual school uniform replaced by jeans and a black t-shirt with a dark purple vortex spiralling towards the centre in homage to his duel-monster cards.

He watched as all of the other duellists sprinted into the forest, determined to find duelling arenas to challenge others from.

Looking around he spotted Mai, Tristan and Serenity climing out of a boat covered in what appeared to be guts.

Either Marik convinced them to sacrifice a chicken or Joey's been playing with seagulls again

At a closer look he spotted a shock of blonde hair sticking up from the boat just in front of a mop handle that waggled back and forth.

Yugi looked around for Tea, found her looking for her Australian friend and decided he was better off alone.

He set off towards the woods, his mind seething with possibilities over who might have the millennium puzzle and where it could be when he almost tripped over a boy sitting on the ground checking his deck.

"Sorry about that, are you okay?"

He asked.

"Fine"

Came the muffled reply.

"Wait, I know that voice…"

Yugi wrenched the boy's hat off and low and behold it was Mokuba Kaiba.

"Why aren't you with Seto?"

"I uh told him I wanted to go it alone."

"Why don't you come with me, that way you're sure to meet up with him at the end of the tournament, because he never misses a chance to duel me and if I wear your cap, nobody will recognise me so you can fight some good duels."

Mokuba looked up at him and watched as Yugi tucked his hair under the cap, without his millennium puzzle and pointy hair he found that even he couldn't recognise him. Mokuba leapt to his feet.

"This'll be great, you can teach me all you know and then I can face my brother in the finals and prove to him that I don't need to be protected anymore."

The two walked off into the woods.

* * *

(North beach)

Joey tipped the last bucket full of blood stained water over the side,

"Can I _please_ go now?"

He asked the beefy pilot who had been sitting watching him.

"Bugger off before I get ya' kicked outa the tournament blondie."

The sailor answered.

"And remember I'm duelling in this tournament too pup, so stay outa my way and I won't make things difficult for ya."

Joey made a gesture involving two of his fingers in response and walked off with his sister, Tristan and Mai. As they reached the tree line Joey turned to Mai and said.

"Jeez that old sea-dog's grumpy, he ought' ta ligh'en' up."

"Joey you covered his boat in seagull guts, just be thankful he let it go after you cleaned up. Calling me a pup… Wait, I know what to do."

Mai and Tristan hit their hands against their faces then tried to grab Joey before he yelled;

"Oi you, big-dog, come and duel me if you think you're hard enough!"

But they were too late.

* * *

(L-space)

Ok, I actually know where the plot's headed now, no questions it will all be revealed soon enough. Yugi always needs to be in a posse with someone, its Yami who's the loner. Standby for a sneak peak at the next chapter;

Joey watched in terror as the tree fell, everything seemed to slow down around him as it crashed down, breaking branches against the other elms that occupied the forest, he felt his legs go numb, his entire body was paralyzed, he could not move. He felt his heart beat against his ribcage as he took what he thought was going to be his final breath.

(Disappears in a flash of smoke dragging his next chapter with him, all you can see is a shiny blue button)


	37. A Brother's love

The plot is starting to move, u better stay with it or it'll get you!

* * *

Imagine a place, parallel to a dimension.

The sort of place you might find a weird mirror or a spooky door.

My friend, you have just entered...

The stoner's realm...

(Intro scenes)

(Explosions!)

(Duels)

(A cook juggling with two knives)

(The Winged Dragon Of Ra, and Slyther the sky dragon flying together towards a boat.)

(Kaiba pointing at Obelisk the Tormentor in amazement)

(Big Explosion)

**YUGIOH,**

**ENTER THE STONER'S REALM**

* * *

(The next day, somewhere in the forest)

Mokuba and Yugi stepped into the clearing, leaning up against a duellist-kingdom style duel arena, was a French mime, in a black and white striped jumper, white gloves, black trousers, white makeup and a black beret. The mime opened its mouth to speak.

"You are Kaiba's brother correct?"

He had a flawless English accent;

"I am John, like the duelling arena? I found it ten minutes after we arrived on the island, I've already won 2 duels here."

"Well you won't win another, I challenge you to a duel!"

"Hah, okay, but since you challenged me, I go first."

John rode the lift up the side of the arena and assumed his podium.

"Come on Japanese boy, give it your best shot."

Mokuba quickly took the lift up the red side.

"Yugi, no help during the duel remember!"

Mokuba shouted, they'd spent the last day training, and though they'd now missed duelling most of the newbies, Yugi had thought it was worth it.

_Mokuba's got a good deck, and some powerful strategies, hopefully he'll be able to knock this guy out of the main tournament._

Each duellist strapped on their gasmasks and put their deck on the designated zone.

"Ok, I will first of all, lay one monster and two trap cards face down."

Shouted the Frenchman.

"End Turn."

Mokuba drew

"I summon Avatar of the Pot and sacrifice pot of greed to draw 3 cards, and then I place one card face down on the field, your turn."

The Frenchman drew, then burst out laughing;

"Well my friend you have the misfortune to be facing one of my most powerful combos, there is very little chance that you can win once the ball gets rolling, and the two cards I placed earlier will stop anything that hopes to oppose me."

John held a card up in the air.

"I summon Maji-Gire Panda to the field!"

He slammed the card down onto the field. And a giant panda crawled out of its card sleepily and sat up, then batted its ear comicallly;

Maji-Gire Panda:

Attk; 1000

Def; 1000

Mokuba looked on in amusement; "That creature only has 1000 attack points, my monster has 200 more attack points than it!"

"But that's not all I flip Rescue Cat into attack mode then activate its special effect!"

The Cat dived into his duel disc and pulled out two cards, laying them out on the field, as the hologrammatic projectors summoned the new creatures to the field it dived into John's graveyard.

The two cards shimmered into being, out of one stepped a hyena, a smile on its doglike face, from the other stepped a mouse with a black Mohawk hair style on top of its head.

"Now my Hyena attack his monster!"

Mokuba set a determined scowl as the hyena leapt towards his Avatar of the pot, to his amazement the avatar dodged the hyena's furious attack and punched it in the face, the hyena exploded in a cloud of coloured shards.

John: 7800

Mokuba: 8000

Mokuba laughed; "Ha, is that all you can throw at me?"

The older man smiled; "Boy I ain't even started."

Another Hyena materialized on the field.

"What?"

Yugi and Mokuba both exclaimed at the same time.

"I've spent years developing this strategy, there's no way you can defeat it, every time a hyena monster is destroyed in battle another one comes to avenge it. Now attack his pot avatar my monster."

Again the hyena leapt towards Mokuba's genie, which sidestepped and casually backhanded the creature across the face.

John: 7600

Mokuba: 8000

"Why are you doing this, you're just wasting monsters!" Shouted Mokuba.

At this point Yugi noticed the other duellist's panda, now not so sleepy or funny anymore, sitting seething with rage, rocking back and forth on its haunches.

"I'm sure he has his reasons."

John smiled seeing the realization dawn on the rich-kid's friend as he sent his third and final hyena to be destroyed

Mokuba grinned cockily; "Oh I get it, you've realised you can't win so you might as well sacrifice your monsters so as to look like you're giving the little kid a chance, but it looks like you've run out of hyenas to send at me, so anytime you wwant to end your turn will be fine by me."

"Little boy, I don't know who else you've faced but I don't hold back on anyone, I've got no illusions when it comes to your duelling skill and certainly none where it comes to mine and you will not be able to defeat me, now Chu-Ske the Mouse Fighter, suicide attack his avatar of the pot!"

The mouse boxer dived towards Mokuba's spirit and punched it square in the pot. The pot chattered with the force of the punch and the spirit started shrinking to the void where it used to be, just before it's arm withered out of existence, it grabbed onto the mouse, dragging it to the graveyard with it.

"Well that's just peachy, looks like you've got no monsters on your side of the field, now my panda can directly attack your life points."

Mokuba smiled; "Even so its attack is only 1000, you almost took that much off your own lifepoints, once I take my next turn I'll wipe it out and take out most of your life points in one volley."

Mokuba played with his Gradius and Option's cards, 4 monsters in one turn, each with over a thousand attack points would reduce the stranger's life points substantially next turn. _If only I had my limiter removal in my hand, with that I'd have 3 options with 4 times the strength that they'll be when I summon them, ah well I should trust in the heart of the cards._

Yugi cringed, i_f only Mokuba would remember what I just taught him, and he'll get mad if I try and remind him now, he said that when he was duelling he wanted no help, that he wouldn't be allowed any in the finals, so he needed to practice that way. If only Yami was here, he could get into his mind and remind him subtly. DAMN!_

John smiled; "Kid, look at my panda now, did you really think I wasted my precious beasts? Every animal is important, and now let me introduce to you the ability of my Maji-Gire Panda, every time one of my beasts or beast warriors are destroyed, it gains 500 attack points, permanently. This far in the game every move is done for a reason lad, you may have got this far through luck and a few powerful cards, but in this game you need strategy and you have to realise that your opponent needs the same thing."

Mokuba looked at the panda, in his eyevisor the information popped up;

Maji-Gire Panda,

Current attack points; 3500,

Current defence points; 800

As he read the readout he couldn't believe he hadn't noticed it before, it had grown to over 3 times its original size.

"Now my black and white friend, attack his life points directly!"

The panda rolled to its feet, swaying a second it fixed its angry gaze at Mokuba and charged, as it slammed its houlder into him, Mokuba staggered back across the platform;

"Mokuba noooo!"

Yugi ran around the back of the duelling field as the younger duellist stepped over the edge into empty space. Mokuba fell back, then felt something stop his fall. The hose of the gasmask had extended to its full length and prevented his fall. Mokuba reached up and pulled himself back onto the podium, his eyes watering from the smoke.

John: 7400

Mokuba: 6500

"That's more powerful than my brother's blue eyes… If it keeps gaining power…… there's nothing I can do…"

He looked dejected…

Yugi was fed up; he had to say something;

"Mokuba, you can defeat it, remember what Rebecca gave you, just trust in your deck to give you the cards you need!"

John smiled and placed a spell card on the field;

"Oh and I activate Spell Absorption, your move."

Mokuba looked at his hand, all he had was his Gradius combo and a useless magic card.. _wait…_ he looked closer… not entirely useless, he could use it to protect his gradius and defend his life points, suddenly Mokuba realised what Yugi was talking about; _If only I get that card next… I might be able to pull off a victory._

He closed his eyes and reached towards his deck. For some reason in his mind he imagined seeing Rebecca standing right where his deck was, he slowly reached out and took hold of her hand, it felt roughly oblong and as thin as a piece of card, Mokuba quickly opened his eyes and stared out through his smoky gasmask, he quickly stopped himself from crushing the card and held it up to the rest of his hand;_ It was it! At that moment he could have hugged her. Even kissed her in joy. _

"Haha, John, you'll never be able to get past my defences, I summon my powerful attack ship Gradius in defence mode. Next I launch my 3 Gradius's Option's, which each get the same power as my gradius, next I activate heart of clear water on gradius, preventing it from destruction, next I activate Ring of Magnetism."

As Mokuba placed the card on the field, he felt Rebecca's hand on his own for the smallest part of a second. And from that feeling on his hand, a new spark of determination rose up through his body. _Rebecca, I'll face you in the semi-finals and prove to you that I'm smart by defeating you in a duel. Your card has saved me. Thank you._

"This means that Gradius can not be destroyed and you have to attack it. And while it's in defence mode I take no damage! Your move."

John: 8400

Mokuba: 6500

"True but now I have more life points than when we started this duel, and my panda can defeat any monster in your deck. But just to make sure, I summon black cat with white tail!"

A black cat stalked out of its card, sporting a white tail with a pink bow tied around it.

"You see, I have several cards which can provide your gradius of its defences or destroy it outright by not designating it by name, so instead of wasting cards trying to get around your combo, I'm going to power up my panda so that when I do get the cards I need, I can wipe out your life points in one attack. Black Cat with a white tail, attack his Gradius!"

The cat leapt towards Mokuba's fighter jet and scratched at its outer hull, within the blink of an eye, the force field protecting the craft fried the cat.

"And since my black Cat had the same attack as your gradius' defense, I lose no life points! Your move"

Maji-Gire Panda,

Attk: 4000

Def: 0800

Yugi started to fret, Mokuba had no monster powerful enough to take down the Panda directly and if he summoned a monster this turn he wouldn't be able to employ one of his man-eater bugs against it. _He's surely doomed, all he can do is defend until John goes in for the final blow, those 2 face down cards of John's must be a row of defences for his panda. I don't like this, Mokuba just doesn't have the cards. If only he had a harpies feather duster or a giant trunade or some such card._

Mokuba felt a blue aura surround him, _Am I going crazy?_ He looked at John and Yugi, _Neither of them have reacted, maybe only I can see it, maybe its just a hallucination brought on by the weed._ He looked across and saw that the aura was coming from the top card in his deck; even the black vortex was blue. He heard his brother's voice in his ear; _Mokuba, use the power of the gods! This is my gift to you for the tournament, now prove me you deserve it and use it!_

The aura faded, but the blue tinge on the card remained. Mokuba suddenly realised what his stoned subconscious was trying to tell him.

He drew the card. He was right, there was only one possible way he could do this if he'd learnt right from Seto, he needed to summon one more monster first;

"I summon Kuriboh in defence mode!"

_What the hell's he doing? He's just filled his monster card zones with a monster that's useless on the field!_

Both Yugi and John thought the same thing, unknown to each other, then Mokuba winked at Yugi and turned to John; "Your move."

"Huh, I summon another black cat with white tail. Then I activate the magic card pack revival, if I have 3 monsters with the same name in my graveyard, they are all summoned to the field, so say hello to my entire hyena pack, now black cat with white tail attack Mokuba's Gradius again. Then my hyenas, attack each other!"

Another cat went to fry itself on the grounded fighter's force-fields and the panda grew angrier. Then 2 of the hyenas jumped on the third and a cloud of dust grew up around the fighting cat/dogs. When the dust cleared, all 3 lay dead, blood spewing out of their throats, the dead monsters disappeared into hologrammatic shards.

Maji-Gire Panda,

Attk: 6000

Def: 0800

"Next turn kid, you're out. Your move, lets see if you can save yourself."

Mokuba drew and added his new card to the one already in his hand.

"I AM NOT A KID! And to prove it, I won't even let you have one more turn, you made a mistake pal, and that was underestimating a Kaiba…"

Yugi's eyes widened in shock, how Mokuba could defeat that monster, surely he hadn't forgotten about the Frenchman's 2 trap cards!

"Many people have stupidly considered me a chink in my brother's armour, a weakness in his impenetrability, but you are all wrong, I am just as strong as he is, and united we are even stronger. You have stupidly allowed me to summon 5 monsters to the field, this gives me 5 tributes…"

John cut in; "You stupid kid, having 5 monsters gives you no advantage, you can only summon one monster a turn, and there is none powerful enough to require 5 sacrifices! Next turn you'll lose, then I'll take one of your cards and go on to beat your brother in the finals!"

Mokuba fixed him with his harshest glare from behind the gasmask, John felt the gaze of a thousand generations of the boy's family behind that glare. "NEVER INTERUPT A KAIBA IN THE MIDDLE OF A RANT! For that without any further introduction I sacrifice my 3 Gradius' options to summon my brother's gift to me!"

John smirked, he'd been waiting for an attempt to destroy his panda, monster é monster, and activated a trap card.

"Not so fast kid."

He said as the hologrammatic shards of the 3 monsters swarmed together.

"My trap card torrential tribute will destroy your new monster and your Gradius and your stupid kuriboh leaving you open to attack from me next turn! And I sacrifice my purple kuriboh from my hand to stop my trap hurting my poor endangered panda!"

A wave of water crashed onto the field smashing into the colomn of light where the broken shards of Mokuba's machines were forming together, knocking it to the ground, the water level rose as the wave smashed over Mokuba's Gradius and Kuriboh, dragging them a little way before the water level rose over the top, filling up the duelling arena. All that could be seen was a panda hanging onto a purple furry life preserver.

"Nothing could have survived that kid, not even my panda if it hadn't had its kuriboh float."

Mokuba collapsed into giggles. "You think a measly tidal wave can destroy my brother's monster? You are sadly mistaken my friend, you over-estimate your duelling skill or underestimate what you're facing severely!" The water drained away exposing an enormous blue rocky figure, shielding a fighter jet and a, now drenched, furball.

"You face Obelisk the Tormentor! One of the 3 Egyptian god cards! Obelisk I sacrifice my other monsters to you! Charge your Soul Energy Max, then destroy that panda!"

The purple float evaporated into nothing as Obelisk picked up the bedraggled Kuriboh and the water-logged fighter jet in each hand, then crushed them and roared, as it grew and their souls filled up its body with new strength.

"One card does take 5 sacrifices to summon John, and that's obelisk at soul energy max!

The god's power rose to infinity.

It drew back a fist and sent a wave of energy at the panda, John's remaining face down card flew off the hologrammatic field, and smashed into the podium, the panda went flying into John, sending an enormous cloud of smoke into the air as John flew back off the podium into a tree, snapping the gasmask's hose. His entire side of the field exploded showering the grass with sparks.

Mokuba heard a scream as the tree fell down.

Mokuba: 6500

John !#?

He grabbed his deck, pulled his gasmask off and jumped off his podium and rushed towards the tree, ignoring his eyepiece as it recorded the win.

"I thought you'd sealed the cards!" Mokuba yelled at Yugi as they both ran to help John and the unlucky pedestrian.

* * *

(The other side of the tree line)

Joey watched in terror as the tree fell, everything seemed to slow down around him as it crashed down, breaking branches against the other elms that occupied the forest, he felt his legs go numb, his entire body was paralyzed, he could not move. He felt his heart beat against his ribcage as he took what he thought was going to be his final breath. He watched an enormous pointed branch fall towards him. Having seen his life flash before his eyes so many times before, Joey skipped through the boring bits and watched with fascination every second he'd been with Mai, even recalling the different perfumes she'd used on each card in her deck when they'd first met.

* * *

(l-space)

(a big shiny button presents itself to you, marked REVIEW)


	38. Poor poor Joey

Hi, thanks for the reviews, finally, what I've been planning since chapter one, the death of a major character, who will it be? Find out now…. On

* * *

YUGIOH,

ENTER THE STONER'S REALM

"Joey!"

He heard Mai scream, as he turned around to look at her, to slowly to escape the tree, then suddenly just as Mai came into view she crashed into his chest sending him flying back, away from the tree, he rolled over backwards until he fell into another tree, but he was alright, Mai had saved his life. Joey pulled himself to his feet, he couldn't see Mai, he ran over to where Tristan and Serenity stood, their mouths open in shock. Joey looked down at the tree trunk which he'd narrowly avoided being crushed to death by and saw a familiar lighting bolt of hair sticking out from under a branch, crushed.

"Tristan!"

He yelled, indicating at the log, his friend rushed to help him and they struggled to lift the tree, ignoring the man who had fallen into a bush nearby them.

Joey felt the log move, he gave it every ounce of strength he had and heaved at it until he was red in the face, slowly but surely they lifted it off the ground. And from underneath, Mai's head lolled out, blood trickling out of her mouth, Joey rolled the log over, panicking now, sticking out of Mai's back, was the same sharp branch that He had known was for him, Joey bent down and embraced Mai whispering to her;

"You're going to get better, you're not going to die, these stupid headset things send out a distress signal, someone's coming, just hang on, you can do it….."

"Joey…."

Mai struggled to speak, a single tear rolled out of her eye.

"What? Shhh Mai don't talk, conserve your strength!"

"Joey… I love you…"

Another tear rolled out of her eye and Joey watched the spark, the fire that had lured him to those eyes, die.

"No Mai, don't go! I love you too! Noo!"

Joey pulled her limp body off the branch that impaled her through her heart, he looked at the gaping hole and sobbed, putting his hand over her eyes, he gently pulled her eyelids down. As he did this he could swear an almost invisible figure swung a scythe into her leg, and the merest voice on the wind;

_SHE'LL BE BACK, TRUST ME_

Joey crouched for a second, stood and walked deeper into the forest as Mokuba and a strange teen in a hat ran into the now cleared area.

"What happened? Is the mime alright?"

The stranger asked, trying to make his voice sound gruff.

"My… my brother's girlfriend, a tree fell on her… the man…. He's fine."

Serenity turned and fled after Joey into the forest.

A tournament official stepped out from behind a tree.

"Someone's going to have to take her place in the tournament, we'll freeze her body so her family can cremate her or bury her or whatever. You, long and lanky.."

The tournament official passed Tristan Mai's entry tag.

"Congratulations you just got through to round 2 of the stoner realm; any of you can take her cards, including her brand new tournament card which will still continue to evolve as long as its duelled with."

The official dropped her deck-holder and bacg on the ground, threw Mai's body over his shoulder and walked off muttering;

"As if there haven't been enough deaths already."

Tristan looked at Mokuba, then at the stranger, his face was hdden by a neck bandana and a hat, there was something familiar about this boy, he watched the boy nod to Mokuba, then younger Kaiba ran forward and picked up Mai's bag and deck holder, he offered them to Tristan;

"Give them to Joey for the rest of the tournament at least."

Tristan thanked the two, and ran off after his friends.

* * *

(Somewhere in the forest)

Joey ran towards the big hill which loomed up in front of him, the layout of this island seemed very familiar to him; suddenly he found the trees thinning out around him, a light flashed out of a cave mouth which lay littered with shards of a smashed boulder. He ran into the cave as the light disappeared, following the tunnel he came upon a cave, bones littered the floor. He stopped suddenly as he heard a voice;

"You know the pharaoh is just going to defeat you don't you, he will return it to its rightful place, you are just helping his cause."

Then suddenly a strangely familiar female voice scythed through the air;

"Hah the pharaoh can not oppose me, his soul has been rendered by that stupid boy's, bumbling sidekick, I have heard that the puzzle sleeps in pieces at the bottom of the sea, where the pharaoh shall be trapped for all eternity, unable to live, unable to die. The human vessel will eventually waste away, the spirits had become to intertwined. It's a shame, though, but what can I do about it, huh, and he thought I was a fangirl!

_It's Wind, god she talks a lot._

And you won't be able to tell anyone you've lost it yet, because of that loss, you're consigned to the side tournament until round 4!"

"Dear girl, I've got a feeling that you may just be helping along the will of the millennium items, they all transgress towards their rightful owners sooner or later."

The older speaker disappeared in a flash of light as Joey came storming into the room.

"Ok bitch, where's Yugi's puzzle?"

"Excuse me? Oh yeah, you lost it didn't you.

Wind laughed; "Oh yeah, ok, I'll…."

Behind Wind, a glow spread, fairly quickly, Joey could make out a pair of scales.. They seemed to be calling him.

Noticing the strange way Joey was looking at her, Wind stopped talking;

"Oh you like my newscales do you?"

She bent down to pick up the millenium scales, giving Joey a good view of an old-style duelling field behind her. He remembered this place…

"AH!"

Wind jumped back, her hand burnt on the millennium scales, she looked at Joey.

"They appear to want you."

She said.

"Ok, fine, I'll duel you for them, and if you win I'll also tell you wear that runts millennium puzzle is."

"And if I lose?"

"Then I get your deck and your brand new card."

"But you keep yours whatever?"

"You still get one card from my deck, but you'll probably want the one I got off uncle Shadi."

She jumped up onto the duelling platform, the millennium scales burning at her fingers as she set it down next to her;

"Come on. Ya wimp."

Joey ran to the other podium; "No one calls me a wimp and gets away with it!"

He shouted as he climbed up the ladder to the back.

"I'm going to beat you and get Yugi's puzzle back, then these bad things will stop happening to me and I can finally tell Mai I love her!"

"Ok, so you just goin' to bark or are you going to duel?"

"K', 'cos ya challenged me, I get to go first!"

* * *

(Next to a fallen tree)

Yugi sat down;

"I can't believe Mai's dead, I mean, people have gone to the shadow realm and come back, but I don't even think Yami can bring her back from the dead

Mokuba ran over to the mime;

"are you okay Sir?"

The mime struggled to his feet;

"I zink so, but zat bump on deh head has caused my… franch acsant to re-turn agan, but I em fine, ve shall upgrade oor cards, zen u can 'ave one oof mine."

"Uhm… Ok."

Mokuba followed the Frenchman back to the duelling field, in shock after what happened with the god card.

John showed Mokuba where to insert his baby blue eyes card, and out of a hopper came with it;

Baby Blue eyes 2

4 stars

Whenever Baby Blue eyes is on the field, this card gains an extra 500 attack points and an extra 700 defence points.

1500, 2000

Mokuba shuffled the 2 cards into his deck while John powered up his tournament card.

"Vell, u defeated moi, soo take one of my cardes."

John handed his deck to Mokuba for him to search through it.

"I'll take Pikeru's Circle of Enchantment"

Mokuba slid the card into his deck and walked off with Yugi to find a working field, shaken that he'd killed someone.

"It's all Joeys fault,"

Yugi muttered, "If he hadn't separated me from Yami, the seal would have remained intact and the Gods would be contained, we have to recover Slifer, with its power now returned it's only a matter of time before someone else gets killed."


End file.
